Post # 107
@MrsBrown13: thank you. I realized that after all this kinda went down. When I originally posted it was out of anger and fear after I’d read it. So many issues have come out. And again, I had never even thought if looking at his phone until he jumped all over me about mine. And in my mind, for someone to get that upset may be hiding something. And he was. I got upset because he’d gotten upset at me for something he was guilty himself of. None of these things would bother me so much if they were isolated. It’s just all together. Like the issue with the password. It wasn’t a big deal for it being a friends name. But someone he had strong feelings for? That he still talks to on a regular basis? And she is so whiny. “My bf never has money. We always fight and I need money”. It just makes me feel like she’s sort of holding him on a stRing. I’ve been there. I’m guilty of doing that to guys I liked in the Past. Tried to make them feel guilty for only wanting to be friends when I really cared for them. I’ve also been the one on the string. Not good enough to date but good enough to look up when they were “lonely”. I guess a lot of its from personal experience. To whenever a girl complains that’s she’s ugly or stupid or whatnot is wanting to be told different. And if its a close friend that’s one thing but to ask someone you know really cared for you is driving the knife in deep. Or maybe that’s just me.
But also on that note, we have been talking and things seem to be settling in.
Post # 108
@dogloverforever: I completely understand. I remember doing things I should not have in my younger days on the same lines. I personally do not think there is room for exes, unless children are involved, in new relationships. Especially if you are planning a life togehter. I am glad to hear that after some of this came out things seem to be improving though.
Post # 109
WAYYYYYY over reacting!
Also, stop going through his stuff! I agree, it wasn’t right for him to do it first, but you didn’t have to retaliate with a tit-for-tat. Creeping his exes and stuff isn’t helpful to you either. Just stop.
Focus on the two of you, stop being so jealous! He’s with you for a reason!
Post # 110
@Stoich: I am horrified by the lack of privacy on the bee too. I don’t want to know my husband’s passwords and I don’t want to check his accounts. I don’t want to snoop through his stuff. If he (or any guy) wants to cheat and keep it secret, he’ll find a way.
Post # 111
I’ve steered way away from the original post. And my reasons for that are because there are all these reasons to be worried about things going on. I understand its hard to really see what is going on without being in or near the situation. Also everyone seems to think that I track his exes every move. That’s not true. I wanted to know what try looked like. some girls don’t want to know anything, me, I like to not feel like there’s completion because the ex was prettier. I’ve dated a bunch of a**holes who have even said “my ex was prettier or smarter or whatever”. Needless to say that’s why they’re an ex. However those kinds of scars hurt. Feeling inferior is something that has always happened to me. I’ve been taken advantage of by a guys ex. When exes send stuff saying I made a mistake letting you go it makes you feel vulnerable. Wondering if he really wants her back. I’ve been used several times as a rebound. Again, it makes you afraid and hesitant. I shouldn’t base him on exes, but it happens. just as he does to me because of exes. When his mother has said I wasn’t as good as or as pretty as such and such and such n such is the one sounding like she wants him back it all worries me. There’s a lot more to both sides of the story that has been posted.
And to those who say there is no privacy, he logs into Facebook on my computer and leaves it open. His email is programmed to my phone so when bills come in I get the notification. I’m sorry these things pop up and I see them. And yes maybe I was wrong in getting even, but it happened.
Post # 112
I’m happy to say that we have talked about all of this and the issues that we have about it with each other. He also admitted that he talked to a coworker, to say he didn’t understand why I felt this way, and when he answered his questions, the coworker (also male) set him straight (his words, not mine). I think that was what we really needed, to have someone outside the relationship explain what it was that was going on.