(Closed) Am I overreacting??-rant

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1135 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

Oh, I’m so sorry you’re dealing with so close to your wedding (congratulations, btw!)!  I think at this point you just have to let it go.  Yes, they’re being totally inconsiderate and rude.  BUT.  You have bigger things to worry about right now, and you can’t spend your energy worrying about these girls and whether they will be hoping your wedding festivities end soon.  YOU enjoy YOURSELF and if they can manage to do that too, great, but if not, NOT YOUR PROBLEM!  You’ve done an awful lot to accommodate them, which is very lovely of you, and now you just have to let it all go.  They will do what they’re going to do and feel how they’re going to feel, and hopefully they will really be there for you and be supportive and excited.  My guess is that you will be so excited, happy, and busy, that you won’t notice one way or the other.  Have a beautiful wedding!!

Post # 4
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Sometimes people just think about themselves.

I was in a friend’s wedding years ago.  It was an out of town wedding, so my now Ex and I drove down for it.  There was a portion between the ceremony/reception and an open house at a winery where the bride and groom wanted to spend about an hour with just the wedding party at the winery with them.  The Ex threw a fit at not being able to come.  (I was a BM; he wasn’t in the wedding.)  We were at a wedding full of college friends, where he knew tons of people, but he made a huge deal out of it when I went to respect the bride’s wishes (because it was her day!), and wouldn’t speak to the bride and groom when he finally did come to the reception, and picked a huge fight with me about it in front of everyone.  He wouldn’t let it go – it kept coming up for years, that HE wasn’t included and that I sided with HER.  (On her wedding day! When she asked me to be there to support her! And he had tons of people to hang out with anyway!)

Some people just can’t get over themselves.

Anyway, it’s your wedding.  You’ve already gone out of your way to accomodate her. If she can’t accept what you’ve done, too bad. She can always leave the dinner early if she wants to, go to her man, and then meet you guys at the pre-determined drinks place.

Post # 6
Member
4123 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I’m so sorry. If there is one thing I’ve learned, it’s that unless you’ve had a wedding recently, you just honestly DONT GET IT! Seriously. Un-married younger friends don’t get the cost and let’s face it, etiquette isn’t exactly heavily taught to the level it used to. Then, older married guests don’t get how expensive weddings are… I’m always amazed when people no-show… I work in the wedding industry and for larger weddings it’s the “norm” to have an entire table not show up. So that’s meals and drinks, chairs, rentals, etc for 8 people who just didn’t feel like coming… 

What kind of place for drinks are you going to? Will it be like a bar? If so, then let them socialize with each other, say hello, chat for a few min. and then move on to your next set of friends… 

Post # 7
Member
1940 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I’m sorry you’re having such a difficult time.  I wish I could find a post that someone put up a while ago basically talking about how your wedding will never be as important to other people as it is to you (she said it a lot better than I am).  I would just try to focus on the fact that you and your Fiance are getting married and try not to worry about these last minute things that come up (easier said than done I know).

Post # 10
Member
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Wow; some people just are like that. It makes me sick. Honestly; I would probably reply with just what you said. I would say “I don’t know how long my Wedding Dinner will take. I’m planning on enjoying it & not rushing through it. If your worried about a time restraint I will just see you afterwards for drinks!”

Post # 11
Member
234 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Demo dreamer said it best. You’re not throwing a party and making them attend it is your WEDDING and it is optional for them to attend. They should work around your schedule not the other way around.

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