Post # 1
I have 4 bridesmaids and my one bridesmaid is really hurting me with the way she’s acting. When my Maid/Matron of Honor began planning the bridal shower and beach weekend/bachelorette party, she emailed all the girls months in advance to ask them what would work for them. My one Bridesmaid or Best Man has never responded to ANY of my MOH’s attempts to get in touch with her. My Maid/Matron of Honor has called her, emailed her, and even resorted to facebook and has gotten no response. None. My Bridesmaid or Best Man will only reply to me. I don’t mind answering any questions the Bridesmaid or Best Man has, but I’m finding it extremely rude that she is completely ignoring my Maid/Matron of Honor. I’m tempted to ask my Bridesmaid or Best Man about it but I’m not sure if I should.
Right from the start, Bridesmaid or Best Man said she “couldn’t commit” to anything regarding the shower because “the summer is so busy”. Then, after the shower date had been set she told me (via facebook) that should couldn’t come because she had to work. Ok, fine. I understand. However, she didn’t offer ANY help to my other BMs nor did she even bother to send me a card or a text or call me to let me know she was thinking about me. I can’t help but feel hurt by that because I feel like she couldn’t even be bothered to acknowledge me. I know for sure she’s not financially hurting and I’m not sure what’s going on but I feel really hurt. I’d like to address this with her (as well as why she’s not responding at all to my MOH) but don’t know if I should. Thoughts? Also, she’s met my Maid/Matron of Honor once before and they get along really well so it’s not that she has something aganist my Maid/Matron of Honor or doesn’t like her.
Post # 3
Honestly, I don’t know why you haven’t talked to her already. You need to let her know exactly what is expected of her and that she needs to communicate with your Maid/Matron of Honor.
Post # 4
I don’t want to be demanding of her or overstep my bounds.
Post # 6
I would kindly explain to her that there is a reason why there is a Maid/Matron of Honor and in order for things to be planned consistently and via one individual person, it would be most feasable for her to respond to Maid/Matron of Honor. I would then ask if there is a particular reason why she has not responded thus far to the Maid/Matron of Honor. Maybe there is some bickering going on you may not be aware of. Maybe she is jealous that she was not chosen as the Maid/Matron of Honor. Maybe there is some history between the two of them you may not know of.
I would definately delve a little deeper.
Post # 7
Those are good points you bring up. Thanks 🙂
Should I talk to her about how I was hurt she didn’t acknowledge the bridal shower in any way or just stick to talking to her about communicating with my MOH?
Post # 8
You may not need to bring it up depending on how well the conversation flows once you bring up the other issues/questions. Who knows, she may even bring it up herself. If she does comes clean about being jealous or having some kind of history issues with her you can ask “is that why you did not make it to my shower? and see what she says.
Otherwise, if the moment was not right or did not present itself, I would probably would not address it. But…. if she misses another function or fails to follow thru with the going through and responding to Maid/Matron of Honor, then I would definately address it at that time.