Post # 31
Thanks for your input. You’re right – my ILs only have as much power as I give them. I guess I’d just like to avoid their drama as much as I possibly can, because my Mother-In-Law has a tendency to get really ugly towards people if she feels like she’s been wronged.
I would love to get off Facebook completely, but there’s one limitation: I run my own service-based business, and Facebook is a huge marketing tool for me. I have a business page with a modest number of followers, and I use my personal profile to share the content that I create for my biz page in order to expand my audience. I’m sharing less and less on my personal page and it’s been great so far, but as of right now, I’m not in a position to abandon it completely. I try to keep my profile picture current (which is why I’d use one from this shoot, because hey, how often do I get my photo taken by a professional haha). There are quite a few of us entrepreneurs who lament needing a Facebook presence but it’s such an effective way to reach your people.
Post # 32
I concur with everybody else, there is no way any reasonable person could see a private photoshoot, even one with a weddingy theme as upstaging a ( as yet hypothetical ) wedding date.
I might not use a it a FB pic though , or at least only use one of your faces maybe, as I think that might be able to be twisted into use as ammunition,
Post # 33
In some circumstances I am all for lining up preemptive strategies but in this case there is currently no drama and if drama ensues cross that bridge when you get to it. You have IL issues which appear to be making you anxious talk to a professional who will give you specific coping strategies to deal with this. This may help as you navigate SILs wedding. Best of luck.
Post # 34
unless you are doing the photo shoot during their wedding in front of them and their guests I don’t see an issue and how you doing a what sounds like a private photo shoot is upstaging anyone in any way..
Post # 35
- Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom
First and foremost, I LOVE your photoshoot idea!
To be honest, it wouldn’t have even occured to me that my IL’s would view something like a small photoshoot as upstaging a wedding! But if they truly ARE that petty, then it wouldn’t matter when you did the shoot…you could do no right with them anyways. I agree with your Darling Husband, just do it 🙂
Post # 36
Yes, if I do use a photo for Facebook, it would be one that’s just of me. It’s a pet peeve of mine when people have profile pictures featuring more than one person, haha. DHs family is very active on Facebook which is the only reason I mentioned it.
Post # 37
I have a great therapist who is helping me a lot. Years and years of hostility from my Mother-In-Law have left me with residual anxiety and quite a bit of trauma. She doesn’t fight fair, and she knows how to attack a person’s sense of self-worth.
I guess the point of my post was to make sure my instincts were right – that my ILs would be irrational and petty for having a problem with this photoshoot, and that there wasn’t actually a good reason buried somewhere in there for them to get upset over. Hopefully there will be no drama to worry about. I just didn’t want to be the cause of any justifiable rage.
Post # 38
If they get upset about this they are absolutely ridiculous. That anyone could think your photoshoot affects your SILs wedding is completely beyond me. Do as you wish!
Post # 39
I fail to see how your private anniversary photo shoot has anything to do with anyone’s wedding or what difference the color of your outfit makes.
Post # 40
your friend is on crack. that’s just dumb. take your photos. live life. be happy. they’re photos. its not like you’re trying to renew your vows at you SILs wedding! LOL
Post # 41
Unless you choose to hand out flyers of this photo-shoot at your SIL’s wedding, I fail to see the issue. Have your pictures taken, make photo albums of them, post them on social media, send copies of them to whomever might be interested, and have FUN! This has nothing whatsoever to do with your SIL’s wedding.
Post # 42
We booked the photographer officially, so that’s exciting. The photos will be in early October so we can make full use of the gorgeous fall foliage where we live.
Today (AFTER we booked the photographer), we found out that my SIL is moving her wedding up to mid-October/early-November of this year! So our photos will be super close to her wedding after all. Oh well. If DH’s family wants to make something of it, they can go ahead. Hopefully they will be super preoccupied with SIL’s wedding. She’s moved the date up but is yet to book a venue or ANY of her vendors, and October/November is prime wedding season where she lives.
Thanks for all your advice and for reassuring me that my instincts and my DH’s opinion seem correct 🙂