(Closed) Am i the only Bee who's poor?!?!?!?!?

posted 7 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 3
3875 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I think this varies greatly by region. Where I live that house cost would maybe buy you a shack lol. We make more per month than you but it sounds like our bills are higher as well. We try to save $600 per month when we are able to… Sometimes a little more and sometimes less. Our rent for a 2br/2br apt is about 1400$ per month. We are moving soon and our mortgage for a 2 br/2br house will be about the same.

Edit: after our bills are paid and we put money in savings we don’t have much extra cash just sitting around.

Post # 4
652 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@dirtylittlesecret:  Everything you posted above leads me to believe that you’re definitely not poor, and you should be really proud of your savings! You are also a homeowner, which to me, is one of the greatest achievements that there are. It’s one of my biggest life goals in the future. 

We live/lived paycheck to paycheck with relatively high income in an extremely expensive area, so we have never had this kind of wiggle room that some people have. I am definitely envious of people with big savings. Reading some of those posts was making me feel bad, so I had to stop. You’re definitely not alone. Most of the country lives with incomes like you mentioned, not the other way around. 

You sound like you have a great grasp on your own reality, so be proud. A lot of people have major debt too… There are lots of threads on that, to balance the ones with 50k in savings.

Post # 5
5187 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

@dirtylittlesecret:  I’m shocked by what I read on these boards about money too sometimes. My husband and I moved into our first house yesterday (a rental of course) and we’re pinching pennies like it’s going out of style! I don’t foresee us going out to dinner any time soon, let alone shopping for clothes or other extras. I wish I knew the secret of some of these Bees who are fresh out of school and purchasing homes. 

Post # 6
1181 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@dirtylittlesecret:  Fiance and I live in my parents basement apartment- for free. Im currently in graduate school. My program is very demanding so I cannot work. I will have $70,000 in student loan debt when I graduate. I think I qualify as a poor bee!

Fiance works, has a job and earns similar to you and your SO’s combined- near us the cheapest houses are 200,000 and they are run down, in bad neighborhoods. Our carpayments are both low (under 250). So yeah we are poor. For now. But I think it depends on your situation and region. If houses were 70,000 here I would not consider us poor. 

Post # 7
1769 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I think that sometimes you need to remember that what people say online isn’t fact checked by anyone. Sometimes people might exaggerate or flat out lie. And yeah, there are some people/bees who are young, have great jobs, and make a lot of money (or have family money). But there are just as many (maybe more) who don’t. They just don’t go to the threads and say “HEYYY! I have $100 in my savings account and enough for a happy meal in my checking account!”.


Personally, I would say Fiance and I live comfortably. We aren’t raking in the big bucks (I drive a crappy car with a bajillion miles on it because I feel like I can’t afford a car payment), but we can afford everything we need and a lot of things we want, especially now (FI got a promotion that came with a 50% increase in pay (but we’re still under the 100k combined income mark…don’t get any big ideas ;)))

Post # 8
518 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@dirtylittlesecret:  My finances will give yourself a better outlook on life.

My boyfriend (for many reasons) can only seem to find part time work, so in a year he brings in maybe $10,000 at most. Through summer positions and OSAP I have brought in an extra $12,000 but most has gone to school. 

We can only afford to spend $800 per month – $550 of that is on rent. Our grocery budget is only $120 a month so eating isn’t that fun around our place. My boyfriend is luckly to bring in $800 per month some months so we don’t always get a full months groceries.

My credit card is maxed out from paying for groceries when he was unemployed for 2 months so there is no help from that anymore.

Our total wedding budget is $2000 because I already have the dress purchased and paid for and I have an additional $1000 saved in cash – so we are still $700 away from having enough. 

For me it is just painful when I see people on here budgeting $10,000 just for food or say they have $50,000 for the whole wedding. Now that makes me feel poor when their wedding could cover our living expenses for 5 years!

Post # 9
2195 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

I get shocked on here sometimes too. I would be considered “poor” by how most bees seem to live lol.  I consider ourselves average for these parts.

Post # 10
96 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

You’re definitely not alone. My Fiance and I also make about 3,000 combined. Sometimes a little less because I’m in school now. We don’t have a problem paying our bills but after the bills are paid we usually only  have $100 left over for fun money every month. I wish we could save more every month and hopefully when I get done with school it will be a reality.  

I am very proud/ grateful that we were able to buy a house recently! 

Post # 11
8482 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2014


I have to admit that I often think people are lying or exaggerating about their finances.

I remember one thread about a year ago where people were saying that they wouldnt feel comfortable having a baby if they didnt have at least $20k in savings. I was seriously staring at my screen like :O!! If I had to wait for that, I wouldnt ever have kids.

My dad made $15 an hour when I was a kid and my mom was a Stay-At-Home Mom. We werent rich, but we were never bad off. If they can make it work, other people can make it work.

Post # 12
2653 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@dirtylittlesecret:  Its all relative! While we earn more the cost of living here is very high and our mortgage is over €400,000. 

Post # 13
781 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I’m poor! I live in California and it’s expensive to live here. Although it’s “cheaper” where I live than let’s say, San Francisco, but there’s also a lot less opportunities for jobs. I make $10 an hour and live paycheck to paycheck. Our house was 140,000 and our mortgage is almost 1,000 a month since we put no money down. Since i only make around 800 a MONTH I can only give $250-$300 out of my own money for the house. Then I’m left struggling with all the other bills and whatnot. It sucks. I don’t have any savings but I also don’t have debt so I guess that’s a plus.

Post # 14
1156 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014


I’m not a “poor” bee, but I used to be. I am what Gatsby would call “new money.” One of the reasons I save so much is because I’m still stuck in the mindset that I have no money. I paid tuition my senior year of college and got down to $7 to last me till my next pay check. I didn’t take out student loans, but it meant that I had to work full time and go to school full time to make ends meet. Then live off of $7.22 for 2 weeks in the month of January in -8F weather. Shit froze in my sink.

I think the reason people on the Bee seem to be “rich” is that most of them are in a position in their life where they are starting to make money, getting married, graduating college. I think a lot of us (cough* cough* me) have desk jobs and can spend our time dinking around on the internet and planning weddings.

Me from a few years ago would be waitressing, painting houses, single, tutoring, broke college student… I’m not fully convinced the Bee is made up of a full demographic of ladies out there. Don’t get down on yourself. From your post, it actually sounds like you are doing really well and have your life together. There are plenty of people who have had $50K weddings and are $49K in debt from it.

Post # 15
288 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@dirtylittlesecret:  This is definitly a regional thing. 

We are the “booming” Canada province right now. Things have gone up so much in price, but wages have not.  For years, housing was affordable, but just before I graduated University, it sky rocketed! The previous owner of my house paid $110,000 for it, and 5 years later I paid close to $240,000. On a single girls income. It was tough. But I was determined. 

Truthfully, no matter how much you earn,  it seems like you will spend it. I think back to my student days when I could pay rent, pay bills and party on $1000/month. I remember going down to a dollar in my bank account, saving to buy simple $40 items, and eatting cheap, crappy food and not knowing how I’d pay off my student debt. When I graduated and got a job I didn’t know what I’d do with it all. I was beyond excited. But it goes.. it always goes.

You’re young, and I’m sure things can only get better from there. It sounds like you’re doing just fine!


Post # 16
2831 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

We are living rent free right now but will be looking to move in March or April. 1,200 a month will get us a small two bedroom apartment in not the nicest of areas. Homes in my area are anywhere fron 150K-400K. It’s utterly expensive to live in So Cal/ Inland Empire. We make about 4k combined and that won’t get us very far here. We are bracing ourselves to be broke once we move (we still need to be sure we are able to save at least 4-5 hundred dollars a month.)

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