(Closed) Am I the only bride-to-be that's REALLY enjoying wedding planning??

posted 5 years ago in Logistics
Post # 2
Member
155 posts
Blushing bee

Congrats! So I’ve been engaged 2 months and have done…Nothing! My date is sometime in the the fall of 2017. I don’t know specifically when, I suppose I’ll figure out out at some point (lol). I can’t say that I find the process of planning a wedding fun, I think it’s a personality thing? Perhaps I’ll be more excited once I start planning. My fiancé is wonderful but I think I care more about being married than planning a wedding (Not saying it’s an either/or thing). 

Kudos to you for a small wedding and bridal party. I’m having a small bridal party with just a maid of honor and best man. I’d imagine that the bridal party size and wedding size make it less likely to be stressful? Was it difficult to narrow it down to 60 people? 

Post # 3
Member
1164 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I have heard of maybe two brides that love wedding planning, so it’s not unheard of.  I think wedding stress has to do with several factors: 1) budget.  Wedding planning would be a breeze if I had an unlimited amount of money to spent, 2) how much time you have time to spend on wedding planning, 3) what else is going on in your life, 4) if your partner is helping you, 5) how family members are reacting, and 6) your expectations.  The fact that you don’t have a Wedding Party helps with some of the stress.  However, OP, I will tell you that wedding planning wasn’t that stressful for me in the first two months.  I had a lot of stuff  planned out in the first couple of months like you too, but it got stressful as the time drew nearer.  I had to chase after guests about their RSVPs, and because our wedding was a Destination Wedding, guests started asking a lot of questions about transportation and lodging.  I have a pretty demanding job, so I couldn’t dedicate a lot of time to wedding planning, so it was mainly done after I worked a 10-11 hour day.  Family wasn’t very supportive, but we were going through some pretty bad family illness, so I understand.  Some brides expect help, but don’t always get it, so they get frustrated.  Others expect their wedding to be the perfect day, but when something doesn’t go right, they freak out.    

Post # 4
Member
10487 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Just wait.

Post # 5
Member
9388 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

Some parts of wedding planning have been annoying.. like having to actually pay that much money, or having to deal with vendors who are frustrating for one reason or another..  And it always sucks when you find out something is out of your budget.

But overall, I’m with you.  I don’t find it wedding planning hard.  For the most part its just fun and exciting.

I think there are a few MAJOR factors that contribute to that, and it sounds like you’re in the same boat on these things:

– my parents and in laws don’t have insane expectations.  So many bees have parents/in laws that expect them to jump through hoops backwards in order to make their wedding into a social event for the parents.

– I have a healthy bank account.  When things were more expensive than I anticipated I only had to cut out a BIT of my vision.. and I could simply go a bit above budget to take care of the rest.  Some bees have to cut it down a LOT to fit their budgets.  That’s never fun.

– I don’t have bridesmaids (just a MOH)… bridesmaids seem like a huge headache for some.

 You’re doing it right, you’re just also lucky.

Post # 6
Member
3440 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

I’m extremely happy that this process has been so carefree for you! 🙂 I wish I could say the same. Truthfully I’m really enjoying some aspects of wedding planning but others not so much. I’ll list them below. 

Enjoyed:

venue browsing – narrowed it down to six then settled on one and signing the contract next Tuesday

website design – customizing it withour own personal details was exciting, having a few people that have already RSVP was also great to see

invitation design – found this website that let me customize and save invitations plus they happened to have a theme with our wedding colors so now whenever we’re ready to send the formal invites all I have to do is login and purchase

online dress shopping – loved looking at all the different styles and designers to try and figure out what my preference was for the day

Fiance – He’s been amazing! Lets me run amuck with planning and the only request he’s had is the date of our wedding. A little worried that people are stressing me out but always calms me down.

Stressful:

Maid/Matron of Honor – trying to turn my wedding into her vision of the one she didnt quite experience years ago

Mother – guilt tripped me into asking my older sister to be a bridesmaid, Maid/Matron of Honor and one other bridesmaid are sisters as well but Im not particularly close to this one

Associates – I’m not sure why when you get married everyone whose ever crossed paths with you in life suddenly feels they should be invited to your wedding and are insulted when you tell them you’re having an intimate gathering with a limited guest list. Seriously these are people we rarely even talk to never mind see on a regular basis!

So honestly if it weren’t for others I would truly be enjoying this process. Since the engagement on 06/03 we’ve (me really but he’s helpful if I need an opinion) managed to secure a venue for ceremony/reception, narrow it down to three dresses, pick the photographer, pick the cake artist, choose the bridesmaids/groomsmen, customize invitations, agreed on colors and created a music playlist. 

Some of this is really fun but it can be stressful as well. 

 

Post # 7
Member
1011 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

I’m looking forward to my wedding, April 2017 too!! But since you asked, causes of stress I’ve encountered so far:

1. Money (or lack therof more specifically). We are paying for everything ourselves so planning has not been fun. More like look at all the super pretty things to have at weddings except that we can’t so we have to just settle on what we can afford 🙁

2. The invite list due to family politics and people not getting along in general. 

3. Deciding all the details like the dress, decor, flowers etc. I’m quite a picky person so I agonise over every decision. Plus point #1 keeps hanging over my head.

4. Worrying about if the guests will enjoy themselves and have have a good time because our wedding is being done very bare-bones (see point #1. Again)

 

Post # 8
Member
2550 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I found wedding planning easy because 1. my full-time job really only required about 30 hours a week, at most, of actual work, 2. my parents pretty much paid for everything, and 3. I don’t have a perfectionist bone in my body.

None of these are things to be proud of. I’d kind of rather be a perfect, independent, hard-worker who hated wedding planning.

Post # 9
Member
387 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Rydges Hotel

I LOVE wedding planning. I actually finished getting 90% things ready and I still have 6months to our wedding. There’s not much to fuss about if you know exactly what you want. I think it gets hard when you are not sure about what you want and have too many options.

Post # 10
Member
452 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

I’m enjoying it as well, but I have a planner so I haven’t really felt any stress, yet. I’m a little, okay a lot, indecisive…but I just remind myself I have time. So I weigh the pros and cons and move forward. We’ve booked venue & figured out the date so far. Down to the final two photographers and have an idea of the caterer we want to go with.

Post # 11
Member
1995 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2016 - Sussex, UK

I LOVED the early stages of planning. Looking round venues, cake tasting, trying on dresses. I was ready to kill someone in the month or two before. Issues with dress alterations, guests bitching about their kids not being invited, suits arrived in wrong size, emails and texts from guests asking for info already provided on invitations, chasing for RSVPs.

I too didn’t understand the stress as I Ieisurely leafed through bridal magazines. I think I asked DH to elope a week before….I loved my wedding day but was so glad when we got back to normal life.

I do know people who loved planning and kind of grieved over it after. I hope you too remain upbeat and enthusiastic until your special day!

Post # 12
Member
1942 posts
Buzzing bee

I am really enjoying it. I think a lot of it has to do with my personality. I find it all fun! 

Post # 13
Member
783 posts
Busy bee

I’m honestly not NEARLY as stressed as I thought I would be! I am okay with making big decisions though so I haven’t really stewed over anything long enough to stress me out. My bridesmaids have done a good job helping when neceesary but not making things about them. My mom and sister (MOH) have been amazing. And my Fiance of course has let me take the reigns on most of it but is always there for me if I need/want help, making a major decision, going to various meetings etc. It’s also fun for everyone in your life to be asking how your planning is going and people are genuinely excited to come to the wedding so that makes me even more happy! 4 months to go! 

Post # 14
Member
783 posts
Busy bee

I will say I am not doing anything DIY so thats honestly probably a huge source of stress for people that I dont have. 

Post # 15
Member
593 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

I don’t find it stressful either.

We started planning the wedding and getting the rings made together as soon as we decided to get married last December. We get the rings next week so I guess we’ll be ‘officially’ engaged next week?

We booked our venue, photographer, caterer, celebrant/officiant back in January/February this year, I tried on dresses at two boutiques but ultimately ordered one from BHLDN and really it’s just the little details that we have to sort between now and May 2017. Bridesmaids are all sorted and are just wearing dresses they already had or whatever, I don’t really mind. I booked a vintage caravan this week for the bar (it’s super cute and I think it’ll add a nice touch, especially as our caterer is a gourmet BBQ food truck). 

Im going to make a backdrop of colourful paper cranes and that’s probably the most ambitious thing to do as I live in a different country so will have to periodically post them back to mum.

We pretty much sorted out the guest list very early on so just have to finalise that. 

I feel pretty relaxed about the whole thing, tbh. We’re just planning a nice party that we get married at, as long as there is good wine, great food, excellent company and we get hitched, im not too stressed about the nitty gritty details- my mum can take care of that.

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