Post # 61
Member
2509 posts
Sugar bee
VictorianChick: I hear you on the “who will take care of you when you’re old?!” thing.
Honestly if I said to someone “I don’t really want kids but we’re going to go ahead and have a few in hopes that one of them will take care of us when we’re old!” I’d be a horrible person lol that is a lame ass reason to have a child.
I sometimes think “I wonder what our babies would look like” but again, that doesn’t justify procreating as that curiousity would be solved pretty quickly lol
Post # 62
Member
108 posts
Blushing bee
I understand where you’re coming from. You shouldn’t have kids if you don’t want them. I know a few couples that decided this was the way to go and they are extremely happy. It’s your decision and no one else’s business. Personally, I always knew that I wanted to have children, starting in my twenties. Funnily enough, I got pushback from people about that saying that 25 is too young for children. I just ignored them. I think it’s something that you know early on and that you most likely wont change your mind later on.
However, I was really disturbed that one of your main concerns is getting rid of a child after 2 years old if the child has a problem. If you don’t have the capacity to love a child unconditionally, then you have definitely made the right choice.
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This reply was modified 5 years, 2 months ago by ellie17.
Post # 63
Member
45 posts
Newbee
ellie17: its not that I would want to “get rid” of the child. Part of my decision to not have children stems from the fact of having a baby that isnt just right is too much of a gamble for me. Me and Darling Husband both work in shift work jobs where we would be unable to provide the care necessary for a special needs child and to take the roll of the dice on my child being special needs the odds are simply too high. I like my life as it is, I do no want to share it with a child too. Nor do I want a peeing, pooping and puking life to take care of
Post # 64
Member
477 posts
Helper bee
- Wedding: The castle at stagecoach
no you are not, im 26 mu husband is 31….we have been married 2 and a half years (civil) 2 years and a few months religious and we DO NOT have kids yet. we dont want children til i finish my ph.d. its a personal choice for everyone
Post # 65
Member
555 posts
Busy bee
I’m 28 (husband is 29) and we both do not want children. We said it to each other relatively early in the relationship, around 5 years ago. I constantly have people telling me I’ll change my mind. Some people even go so far as to start scolding me. Others take a more gentle approach and insist that we’d have “such cute kids” or we’d be “such good parents”.
How in the world would they know something like that?!
Haha I don’t know – people are pretty pushy about this topic and most of the time, I think it’s just because it’s too unfamiliar and outside the norm. To be honest, I have had trouble with it from time to time and sometimes I almost DO start to believe that I’ll “change my mind” but I don’t think it’s fair for people to be so aggressive about it. I should be able to make my own decisions.
Post # 66
Member
3092 posts
Sugar bee
Well, I have two children but never wanted kids prior. However, I honestly cannot imagine my life without them…OMG
However, if I did not have kids, I believe I would have a very fulfilling life as well. And yes, with children as I am sure you already know, your life will no longer be your own. I am glad that you are aware of the sacrifices and it is not for everyone (and that’s more than okay)!
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