(Closed) Am I the only one?! Childfree by Choice in my 20s

posted 5 years ago in Married Life
  • poll: Have you ever been told that when you "grow up" you will want kids?
    Yes : (72 votes)
    81 %
    No : (17 votes)
    19 %
  • Post # 61
    Member
    2509 posts
    Sugar bee

    VictorianChick:  I hear you on the “who will take care of you when you’re old?!” thing.

    Honestly if I said to someone “I don’t really want kids but we’re going to go ahead and have a few in hopes that one of them will take care of us when we’re old!” I’d be a horrible person lol that is a lame ass reason to have a child.

    I sometimes think “I wonder what our babies would look like” but again, that doesn’t justify procreating as that curiousity would be solved pretty quickly lol

    Post # 62
    Member
    108 posts
    Blushing bee

    I understand where you’re coming from.  You shouldn’t have kids if you don’t want them.  I know a few couples that decided this was the way to go and they are extremely happy.  It’s your decision and no one else’s business.  Personally, I always knew that I wanted to have children, starting in my twenties.  Funnily enough, I got pushback from people about that saying that 25 is too young for children.  I just ignored them.  I think it’s something that you know early on and that you most likely wont change your mind later on.

     

    However, I was really disturbed that one of your main concerns is getting rid of a child after 2 years old if the child has a problem.  If you don’t have the capacity to love a child unconditionally, then you have definitely made the right choice.

    • This reply was modified 5 years, 2 months ago by  ellie17.
    Post # 64
    Member
    477 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: The castle at stagecoach

    no you are not, im 26 mu husband is 31….we have been married 2 and a half years (civil) 2 years and a few months religious and we DO NOT have kids yet.  we dont want children til i finish my ph.d. its a personal choice for everyone

    Post # 65
    Member
    555 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    I’m 28 (husband is 29) and we both do not want children. We said it to each other relatively early in the relationship, around 5 years ago. I constantly have people telling me I’ll change my mind. Some people even go so far as to start scolding me. Others take a more gentle approach and insist that we’d have “such cute kids” or we’d be “such good parents”.

    How in the world would they know something like that?!

    Haha I don’t know – people are pretty pushy about this topic and most of the time, I think it’s just because it’s too unfamiliar and outside the norm. To be honest, I have had trouble with it from time to time and sometimes I almost DO start to believe that I’ll “change my mind” but I don’t think it’s fair for people to be so aggressive about it. I should be able to make my own decisions.

    Post # 66
    Member
    3092 posts
    Sugar bee

    Well, I have two children but never wanted kids prior.  However, I honestly cannot imagine my life without them…OMG

    However, if I did not have kids, I believe I would have a very fulfilling life as well.  And yes, with children as I am sure you already know, your life will no longer be your own. I am glad that you are aware of the sacrifices and it is not for everyone (and that’s more than okay)!

    The topic ‘Am I the only one?! Childfree by Choice in my 20s’ is closed to new replies.

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