Post # 1
We were so naive and had no idea what we were getting into with our wedding planning. We are such calm, carefree people and just wanted to throw a party. We don’t care much for material things, but we highly value making others feel good. Our friends are fun and we thought it would be easy! But it’s like weddings bring out the ugly in people. The thing is, my fiancee’s mom has dementia so can’t help, and mine doesn’t help at all. We didn’t realize how hard it would be to 100% handle all the drama and complaints ourselves. Actually, me. Our society is a little sexist so people assume everything is the bride’s fault and complains to me. I had people I hadn’t met complaining via Facebook, email, texting, calls, message via another family member, to complain about the location (a whopping 15 miles away), cake flavor, adult only rule, gift registry, plated dinner, etc etc etc. I was getting a few complaints a day for about 6 months. It just seems like an expensive way to be unhappy. My bridesmaids wouldn’t help and raised Cain over having to attend an engagement party (they showed up for 30 mins and left before dinner because they wanted to eat somewhere else). I know it’s all a sign that I need to reassess the people in my life. Just wish I could have learned this without the bill.
The wedding day was stressful, too. I set up the reception room with 2 bridesmaids because the others were too hungover to help. Of course, the groom and groomsmen finished what we couldn’t. I had to wait until the bridesmaids were done with their hair/makeup to get ready because the bridesmaids wouldn’t give me a spot to get ready. I also had to babysit the flower girls all night despite several attempts to have someone else entertain them so I could get ready. Argh!! And people complained that the 4 course meal was “boring” and many people left before dinner was over and didn’t even said hi. My fiancee got upset because someone wrote in our guestbook “he doesn’t deserve you, but you can teach him.” They meant it as a joke, but this person hadn’t met my fiancee so it wasn’t good taste to write that, you know? My fiancee had a lot of out of town family and good, reliable friends come so he had a good time despite the stress.
There were some good, amazing people who were so helpful, happy, and kind. I will make a conscious effort to keep these influences in my life and gently grow out of the others. Just wondering if anyone else had a similar experience??? So many people have said that their wedding planning was stressful but the day of was perfect!
On a much brighter note, we handled the stress together and I am 100% confident that our honeymoon will be perfect 🙂 🙂
Post # 2
Dude. I am 100% with you on all of this. We’re getting married july 9th and I literally can’t wait to be done with all this planning crap and even the wedding ceremony itself. I also did basically everythign myself with no help. We didn’t even want a wedding but our families freaked out when we mentioned eloping. I am super excited to BE married but all this formal ceremony stuff is not my bag.
Post # 3
- Wedding: April 2015 - Family Farm
My day was beautiful. It went off with almost no problems. Honestly I was a pretty stress free bride. I ate a bunch of food, had a ball.
That said, I am SOOOOOO glad that it is over! I never want to do that again. We have money again! It’s amazing! No more $400 deposit here. $700 there. Just done!
Post # 4
I hated wedding planning!!! I was left all alone to do it because me and DH were long distance at the time. Man, the day after was the best day ever. Freedom!!! And we got what we wanted!! Married. I think weddings are overhyped and underwhelming. Marriages are brilliant! We didn’t get much of a honeymoon because I was really sick. But we had fun in our little hotel room eating ice cream, pizza and pineapple soda watching My Granny the Prostitute. Memorable documentary about pensioners who sell sex! Our kind of weird fun. But yeah no more stress works for this wedded bee!!
Post # 5
I had a great day and wouldn’t have changed a thing, overall very low-stress. BUT I was still so relieved when it was over! I was excited to get back to regular life and not constantly trying to follow up with vendors, plan things, etc. I had the most incredible feeling of relief the day after the wedding.
Post # 6
utgirlie: I had the best time planning my wedding. I was engaged for 3 years before finally saying I do. I went to literally 5 Bridal Extravaganzas and shows, pinned over 1000 things on Pinterest and literally lived and breathed in wedding planning books. My wedding turned out to be exactly how I wanted it and girl let me tell you, I’M SO EFFIN HAPPY AND RELIEVED THAT MY WEDDING IS OVER. My wedding planning was stressful at times and annoying with some of my bridesmaids but girl it is OVER!!! Time to move on with our lives and enjoy married life! Even after the wedding, I heard people hating on my invites, my reception, my this and that and you know what, as long as my husband and I were happy with what we did and chose, who gives?! IT IS ALL OVER!!! WOOHOO!
Post # 7
I’m feeling very glad that I had such a small wedding as I’m thoroughly glad it’s over anyway. It was stressful enough anyway that we told my husband’s brothers they should just elope when the time came. No one complained to us about anything (except one guy saying he just wasn’t into the scenery at all, but everyone thought he was nuts and it’s pretty typical). I did have some problems with help in the kitchen, but technically that’s my fault for not having catering.
Our biggest problem? We scheduled our wedding for the usual dryest month of the year (after spring rain, before ‘monsoon’ and for the entire month prior it rained every single weekend – so of course it didn’t stop, even for our wedding. We got about a half hour to squeeze the ceremony in and the sun came out for about 5 minutes during pictures. I’m sad about that because the scenery was phenomenal and we were really looking forward to our pictures (we love photography). Unfortunately now it’ll probably just look bleak. The important thing though is that the deed is done and we had a great time! I was exhausted after… I can’t imagine how I’d be after a huge wedding.
Post # 8
I enjoyed wedding planning. Looking back though, I would have made some changes to make my wedding day more my speed. I would have had a smaller, much more intimate wedding, no DJ, no dancing. Maybe just cake and punch in the afternoon or maybe a beautiful dinner for my nearest and dearest at the best haunt in town. I got caught up in trying to host the most spectacular shindig, caved into my parents guest list wishes, spent a ton of money and while our day was ab fab, looking back, I can really appreciate the appeal and beauty of smaller, simpler weddings.
TL;DR – It’s a shit ton of work. I’m happy to be married and happy to be done planning one friggin’ day.
Post # 9
I’m waiting for October to get here. I just want it over. LOL
I enjoyed planning but I just want to be married already.
Post # 10
We started planning a destination wedding and I became a frazzled insane bitch within minutes. I thought I was so relaxed and “whatever” about everything until I tried to plan a wedding! We switched to an elopement and saved our sanity (and probably our marriage haha).
Post # 11
Olgarie: RIGHT?! My husband feels the same way! We can finally save money for something else other than the wedding!
Post # 12
- Wedding: May 2015 - Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception / Courtyard Marriott Legacy Ballroom
Wow, I’m sorry you had such a tough time! Wedding planning for me was stressful, but I had a lot of help from DH, so it wasn’t as bad as it could have been! The wedding itself was beautiful, and only had one hitch – there were too many people at some tables, but the guests sorted themselves out and we didn’t hear about it until afterwards. We had a lot of help from my Mom’s friends in setting up the reception, and it was a great time for us – I wouldn’t change anything except maybe moved the date up a week – but I was so glad when it was over and we could move on to married life!
Post # 13
The second we got in the car after the reception my husband and I looked at each other and said “never again.” I wanted a Vegas wedding that we could just live stream to everyone but he said he wanted his family there so I compromised and gave him a wedding. The big stress was getting the reception set up. It took 4 hours and I did a large portion of the work on my own (although my bridesmaids did help as well).
The rehearsal was stressful because my family was late and my husband and his friends hit traffic on the way in so we waited a half hour longer than the intended start date. But then everything was fine. The wedding itself was not “stressful” in the traditional way but it was totally exhausting because being around a crowd of people for the entire day just wears on me. I was totally wiped out by the end of it and we decided that we will never have that big a party ever again. I was so glad for it all to be over.
Post # 14
I hear you! Only my stress comes from NOT planning my wedding! Fiance and I are in Illinois and wedding is in Washington. My mom has planned everything, won’t tell me she’s done things until after the fact, and if I even comment on anything she’s done I “can never be pleased.” His mom goes off and does things without consulting us that we’ve already taken care of….oh and she forced me to invite about 60 people more than I wanted to. We wanted a small wedding and now it’s 120 people….oh well. Needless to say I can’t wait for it to be over!!
Post # 15
I just returned from my honeymoon on Thursday, and back at work today, can’t stop looking at wedding stuff. We were engaged for 23 months before our wedding day, and the wedding itself was perfect. There were a few hiccups, but that’s to be expected.
I miss it so much, I am actually changing careers into the wedding business now. I looked forward to the end of the work day for the past few months to go meet with vendors, and go plan details. I would love nothing more than to be a planner.