(Closed) Am I the Only Sad Bride?

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
175 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I know what you mean. Don’t feel bad or like you’re crazy because home is comforting to you and you get along with your parents- that’s a great thing! I know that it will be hard and difficult to get used to the new life, but you will, and that doesnt mean that you have to give up your family and comfort. Just focus on the positive and the man that you get to share your life with now. It’s a part of growing up, and I’ve been through it a few times. When I got married it meant that I had to move to Japan for 3 years to be with the guy I love… While I wanted to be with him more than anything I was EXTREMELY sad to be leaving home. You are definately not alone.

Post # 4
Member
851 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Homesickness sucks and is sooo hard and you get super depressed but it passes!

Post # 5
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

aww you’ll be totally ok!! i think you need to focus on the fact that you’re not losing your old life, but enhancing it!!
Things will change, but they won’t be completely over! You’ll still have your room in your house, your parents and dog will be there. everything will be there. and TRUST ME this is normal when you’re undergoing any change.
I know exactly how you feel, i think about things like that too… I’ve had a great life as a single girl and i’ve enjoyed my freedom, living alone, having male friends (LOL) not having to answer to anyone. but at the end of the day those are phases in life that pass, and there’s nothing better than knowing you have an amazing husband-to-be that is your best friend and partner in life. PLEASE do not be sad about your honeymoon, it’s an amazing vacation that you will love and enjoy!!

I remember feeling that way when i moved down to south florida for college (i’m from NJ) and even when i moved out of my parents house a few years after college.. you start to have doubts like OMG i dont want to change, this is sad and a bad idea, but then you remember the reasons you went thru with the decision in the first place… and as time passes, the shock passes and then you’ll think back to this and you can smile and tell the story years later:)

 

Post # 6
Member
575 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

No worries, you will get over this. But know that there will still come times, when you still sit and cry about things you miss. But you are starting a new chapter in your life with a wonderful husband and you will also be very excited while it all unfolds.

Best of luck!

Post # 7
Member
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

I think home is comforting to almost everyone, but it is really important to recognize the value of maturing and moving on with your life as an adult. Moving in with your husband doesn’t mean that you won’t see your family – it just means that the time you have with them will be valued even more. Soon, you’ll feel the same way about your time living with your husband – creating a new family is an amazing thing!

Post # 8
Member
1755 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Recently I had confessed to having some of those feelings to a friend of mine who was recently married and she said she’d gone through that too.  Being engaged and getting married is wonderful, but there are some moments of sadness because it’s a big transition.  Especially if you’re moving away from your family.  I’m going from being minutes away from my family to hours away when I get married and I feel a bit lost at times.

Talk with a good friend and here when you have sad feelings.  Believe me you’re not alone.  Give yourself permission to feel sad about leaving one part of your life even while you’re celebrating the start of another.  You might also want to read “The Conscious Bride” by Sheryl Paul which talks about the sad feelings that sometimes come up when you get ready to leave home and get married.

Post # 9
Member
4583 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I was in the same situation when I first moved in with Fiance. We weren’t even engaged at the time, but we wanted to try living together first, knowing we were headed in that direction. Let me tell ya… it was hard. I, too, had never lived away from my folks (I was 26) and I was also only moving about half an hour away from them. But it was a HUGE adjustment. I was super emotional for weeks after the fact, and it hurt even more knowing my mom was so sad to see me go.

But, it DOES get better. Even now, I still have occasional moments of homesickness, but they pass pretty quickly, and I try to see my mom at least once a week. It may not be so bad for you because you’ll have the excitement of being newly married. Good luck!

Post # 10
Member
10 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2011

You should read “The Conscious Bride.” I think it would definitely help you. It’s all about the other emotions involved during the engagement/wedding that people don’t talk about. It discusses how to let go of your single life as a daughter, friend, girlfriend, etc. and how to move towards being a wife, eventually a mother, and creating your own family. It specifically talks about leaving your mom and dad and the emotions that go with it. It’s cheap on amazon.com – maybe $10? Good luck, and hang in there!

Post # 11
Member
69 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Hi bees,

I can’t tell you what a comfort it’s been to read these posts and know I’m not alone. I, too, am waiting to move out until I get married and the closer the date draws, the more scary it all feels. I don’t doubt for a minute he’s the right guy, but the thought of moving out of my parent’s house terrifies me. I feel guilty because Fiance seems happy and excited, and I am too, but I can’t help but have this rollercoaster of emotions (from happy to sad and guilty about moving out , then I forget about and I’m happy again)…and I’m afraid to tell him because he might think I’m having doubts. How long does it take to get over this feeling?? I know it will eventually go away, but this is driving me crazy!

Post # 12
Member
1 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I am feeling sad and anxious myself. I’m in my 40’s and have never been married and will be moving in with my fiance and his children. I’m very independent and while I’m excited I’m very scared, nervous and sad to leave the life I know for something new with so many new challenges. I admit I like my privacy and independence, something I didn’t realize until now. I know I want to marry him and yet I am scared I will fail at wife and stepmom. There have already been many challenges in the moving preparation process. I am happy to read that I am not alone in my feelings. I thought it was just me who was feeling such a rollercoaster of emotions. If anyone has any tips on how they’ve dealt with the changes, I would love to hear them.

 

Post # 13
Member
1270 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 1994

I had been on my own for 13 years before getting married. But my husband and I lived together for about 3 years prior, and I had lived with other boyfriends before. It sounds like a big change for you. Try and think about it as an exciting change when you feel sad.

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