(Closed) Am I wrong?

posted 9 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Should I add the other nieces/nephew to the wedding party?

    Make the oldest who is upset a Jr. Bridesmaid - the others don't care.

    Find a place for everyone in wedding party

    Don't be bullied by the sister

  • Post # 3
    2152 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    Its your wedding. This is the day you get to do what you want.  So do just that. Not what his sister wants you to do

    Post # 4
    357 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    I understand that the sister sucks but the kids are innocent, I wouldn’t want to hurt kids feelings. Inthink leaving her kids out may only make things worse. If youguys were ever hopeful to build a better relationship with her may would be a good start to be the better person and include her kids….

    Post # 5
    4799 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    While I don’t think you should let the sister bully you, I also think it’s a shame that you aren’t closer to these kids because your Fiance doesn’t approve of her parenting style – which I’m sorry, but that’s really none of his business. And I’m sure the favoritism hurts the children, and like Amy said, the kids are innocent in this and I think that  the right thing to do would be to try to build a relationship with them.

    Post # 6
    611 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    View original reply
    @Wonderstruck: I agree with this 100%.

    Post # 7
    5294 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: January 1993

    That’s a dirty move by his sister – she could have easily taken care of that and explained to her daughter that’s it’s ok she wasn’t asked to be in the wedding. To let her call your Fiance and try to guilt-trip him was a mean thing to do to both your Fiance and his niece. 

    Personally, I wouldn’t let her bully you into doing what she wants, but now that she’s pulled her children into this (I can see why your Fiance disapproves of her parenting style), is there any way you can give them a small role? Handing out programs or bubbles/rice?

    Post # 9
    7679 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    I agree with

    View original reply
    @hisgoosiegirl:   It would be a good way to include the kids to give them small jobs, without having it making it something that could get out of hand if the mother flakes out.  The kids won’t be completely left out that way, and the mom doesn’t get to manipulate the situation, or flake out.

    Post # 10
    2246 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I honestly wouldn’t worry about including them.  This little girl probably had NO IDEA (nor did she probably care) that she wasn’t in your wedding. Her mother (your FSIL) is manipulative, obivously.  I can guarantee she rubbed it into her daughter’s head about the other nieces being in the wedding and put her daughter up to calling your Fiance.  If you make way for your FSIL’s kids, she’s likely to not even show up with them. 

    How does Fiance feel about this?  Is he encouraging you to add his other niece, or is he just saying to forget about it?

    Post # 11
    245 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I wouldn’t worry about it either.  I have 35 cousins, yes 35 first cousins and I am the oldest.  I chose 2 to be in the wedding because I am closest to them.  It sucks that the other kids might have hurt feelings but it isn’t their fault that they aren’t close to you.  This should be something that their parents should explain to them.  It was in really poor taste of your FI’s sister to have their daughter call you about it, it puts you in a really awkward position. If you want to placate the situation, just have them give out programs.  That way, they can wear whawt they want and if they don’t show it won’t be the end of the world. Hope this helps!

    Post # 13
    8029 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2010

    It sucks that the SIL would put the kids in the middle.  But I would stand your ground.

    The topic ‘Am I wrong?’ is closed to new replies.

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