Post # 1
I asked my uncle if his son could be our ring bearer last December.
Flash to a month before my wedding. We have not heard from them and we know the wife is not coming because she used all her vacation time and they work saturdays. My dad texts my uncle to see if they are coming because I need to do my programs. My uncle says he is not sure because his vacation has not been approved. They have known about the wedding for more than a year, their son is going to be the ring bearer and he put his vacation in a month before. So I went ahead and did my programs and left him out because as you all know, this last month is STRESSFUL and so many things need to be done. Low and behold, two weeks before the wedding he texts my dad back saying they will be there. TWO WEEKS BEFORE when his son was a member of our bridal party!
I am still having him as a ring bearer but I do not want to redo the programs. I think it was very inconsiderate for them to think I have all the time in the world to wait for just their answer. He is still getting a gift and walking down the aisle, he is just not included in the program. Am I wrong for this? Should I just redo them? Now if I wanted to I could, like if I mispelled someone’s name, but it is the principle of it. Its my time and effort and money going into something because they did not think it was important to find out beforehand.
Backstory: My wedding is on the 19th. This is my last weekend at home though to get everything done since the wedding will be in my hometown and I am leaving to go there next week.
Post # 3
I voted no. I don’t think you need to re-do them. But I also don’t think you should be pissed at them. Yes, they should have worked things out earlier, which is annoying, but it’s not worth getting all riled up. Just be glad that they’re coming and don’t worry about the program and move on.
Post # 4
- Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall
@CuteAsAButton: Personally I would have put the Ring Bearer on the program and then if they couldn’t make it I wouldn’t have cared. But it doesn’t matter, you have other things to worry about with 2 weeks to go!
Post # 5
I wouldn’t be too upset but I also wouldn’t redo them…not because they were inconsiderate but because it’s not that big of a deal and you’ve got lots of other stuff to do.
Post # 6
I’m definetly at the point where I am overly stressed and emotional haha. Two weeks is overwhelming. However, his wife is the type that if she can’t go she doesn’t want him to go (even though she used all her vacation) which I assume is why he took so long to put in for it.
For the record, I would not be this stressed about something this small if the wedding weren’t so close. You could tell me the sky is purple and I would probably cry because I know its not hahaha. Oh lord.
Post # 7
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
@JenGirl: +1. Yes it was inconsiderate of them, but it’s SO not worth getting pissed and having a little one-up by not putting his name in the program. I wouldn’t bother fixing them, but not to “show them”.
Some of the best advice I got when I was getting married was to just LET THINGS GO. Otherwise, the planning process and wedding itself is going to be marked by a lot of stress and pissiness, and that’s what you will remember. Don’t you want your memories to be ones of you being excited and happy, not angry and stressed about little details that went wrong or people who were rude?
I asked my now-husband to tell me when I was getting stressed about something that ultimately didn’t matter – late RSVPs, fiddling with the seating chart a thousand times, exact layout of centerpieces, etc – since often it’s hard to identify that behavior yourself. And I would say, “You’re right, it’s not that big of deal in the scheme of things, why am I letting this ruin the moment?”
Not to get all preachy on you, but it honestly made my experience a thousand times better and everyone was so glad/impressed by a happy non-stressed bride.
Post # 8
@CuteAsAButton: Are they printed yet? If not, you should re-do them. If they’re already printed, I wouldn’t worry about it.
Post # 9
@MrsWBS: Yes they are all printed and cut and ready to go.
Post # 10
I think I am more stressed at the fact that I feel guilty not changing them even though I could but I just have so many other things to do. 🙁
Post # 11
@CuteAsAButton: I say don’t change them, but you shouldn’t be pissed about the situation. Stuff happens, and some jobs really don’t get back to you as soon as you put your time in, so I think this is an honest situation. Just leave the programs as they are becuase there is bigger stuff to concern yourself with.
Post # 12
I voted no, but not because they were inconsiderate. I think you shouldn’t re-do them because I’m sure you have 100 better things to do and spend your money on. Realistically this kid is a kid, and he’s not going to care if his name is in the program or not.
Post # 13
I think them not telling you is inconsiderate. im sorry you are in this position, and hope you sort it soon
Post # 14
Don’t reprint! At this point, it’s a waste of money.
Don’t even worry about it (and certainly don’t bring it up to anyone in your family)
It’s just a ring-bearer… it’s not like the program is the credits to a movie! 😛
Everyone will see the ring-bearer, know who he is (if not by name, by looks) and congratulate him later.
It will be fine.
Post # 15
@CuteAsAButton: I wouldn’t bother changing them. Quite frankly, no one is going to keep them except for you and perhaps your close family members. I wouldn’t waste money on something that will end up thrown out. Plus, it wasn’t your fault. You can’t wait forever for someone to make a decision.
Post # 16
I wouldn’t fix them. If he mentions something about him, you tell him the truth. He got back to you too late after you had asked for an answer earlier. His loss.