(Closed) American women = masculine?

posted 7 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 62
Member
887 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@strawbs:  Thank you!! It is a huge pet peeve of mine when people completely misuse and misunderstand the concept of ‘stereotyping’. One of my previous comments tries to address that, but you explained it really well. 

Post # 63
Member
10363 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

There are about 170 MILLION WOMEN in America.

Generalizing that many people into one group is pretty uneducated and ridiculous.

Post # 64
Member
4474 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@aussiebride26:  We love the Aussies, too!  And thanks for the teeth comments – although I think you have a lot of American Orthodontists to thank for that.

Post # 65
Member
43 posts
Newbee

As an Englishwoman who’ll be marrying an American and into his American family, I have to say that before I met him/them, I had a fair few preconceptions about what “them Yanks” – both male and female – were like (not all exactly complimentary, either.)

 

However, I have to say that everything I thought I knew was wrong. My SO’s family and friends immediately took me under their wing and made me feel at home – they’re so friendly and accepting of me and my weirdo foreign ways. His female relatives have really all been lovely – his mother is very maternal, especially – and I haven’t noticed anything different between the way they act and dress to my friends and I here in Blighty. I’m totally sold on “them Yanks” now.

 

If anything, I would say it’s American men – not women – who perhaps spend less time on their clothing/appearance than, say, Europeans, based on the ones I have met anyway. No bad thing, either. My brother spends a bloody hour and a half in the bathroom getting ready every time we go out anywhere together, moisturising this and gelling that. Does my head in. Also, his trousers sometimes are so tight they would make our mother blush. I’m honestly surprised he doesn’t pass out.

Post # 66
Member
595 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

@araneidae:  I think people’s attitudes about housework is very interesting. I still think that as a nation (and IDK maybe it’s like this in other countries too) we are still struggling to define the roles of men and women in society. I think lots of this is because we have forgotten our history. People like to think that women cooked/cleaned/laundered etc. and many of them did but they forget that women also did farmwork and what not as well.

I think “women’s work” can often be looked down upon because, at least from what I’ve learned in my limited research, women were often chosen for certain work because they were deemed innately more caring, compassionate, feeble-minded etc. I think women can sometimes steer away from being a housewife, teacher, nurse, librarian, etc. because they don’t want people to automatically assume they are a certain way. Also some may feel that by being in that type of profession they are supporting the stereotype.

A few years ago I wrote a paper on stereotypes within American librarianship and it was quite fascinating. For example, initially librarians were men but then Melvil Dewey figured out that if women did it they could be payed significantly less. He also thought they were better suited for the task because he thought women were naturally more patient than men and so could endure tedious tasks…I mean, come on, really? He was a real creeper also as he apparently groped his female colleagues. Ick. Anyway, this is why the profession is feminized now and partly why it’s severely underpaid.

So I can see why women wouldn’t want to associate themselves with anything considered traditionally feminist. Additionally, I think when you are married it’s hard to like housework. If you do housework and you are single it’s like, “Hooray! I’m acting like an adult! Good for me!” but if you do housework and are married it’s like, “Whoop-de-doo, you are doing what you are supposed to. Big deal.”

Post # 67
Member
4655 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@4cube:  

@village_skeptic:  

So much this. Don’t even bother refuting it though, it’s like talking to a wall, just ignore.

I think most women are capable of looking around and gauging how traditionally feminine they are with how traditionally feminine they’d like to be and in what ways. Be however you want. You want to rub feet and make coffee and sandwiches? Great. Don’t? Also great. Don’t act like someone you’re not to appeal to men, find a man who likes the way you normally are.

Also, don’t be a jerk while traveling, kind of a no brainer.

Post # 69
Member
1462 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think that is the point most American women have an opinion and have no problem voicing it. I can only speak for myself when I say that my Fiance appreciates the fact the I do have opinion and I speak up. When he gets pushy I put him in his place and I too love to cook/bake and treat him like a king.

I think when men say those type of things they are looking for a particular type and cant handle a strong minded woman because she intimidates somehow. When a man is strong and secure with himself he wants the same in a mate.

Post # 70
Member
595 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

@minipenguin:  Thanks for the clarification! Very interesting stuff!

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