(Closed) An announcement that informs someone that they are NOT invited

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
2417 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I think I would be more offended if I got a “you are NOT invited (in complete Maury fashion)” then if I didn’t get anything. I can’t believe this is a “trend.” To me, it is just plain rude.

Post # 4
1734 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

That is beyond ridiculous. I hope I never, ever encounter this in real life. Seriously, wtf.

Post # 6
965 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Oh my gahhh!! Oh the one hand I can see from social media and stuff why this has become a trend.  But although I have yet to receive one of these, I would find it extremely insulting if I did.  First of all, like the article says, Get Over Yourself!!  And second of all, give people a little bit of credit!  For the most part, we’re all adults and can understand that a bride and groom cannot invite everyone under the sun to their wedding.  Sheesh, this is beyond tacky IMO! 

Post # 7
108 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

That is rude, and the excuse being budget reasons — I’d imagine the “you’re not invited” un-invites cost a fair chunk of money that could have gone toward the wedding instead of bridezilla pissy mode.

If I didn’t get an invite, I wouldn’t go, simple. I think (or I’d hope this is how people still behave) that the large majority of people do the same. Take care of individual crashers on an as needed basis on the day. See if your venue has security or anyone that can act as a barrier for those who weren’t invited. Crap, hire security instead of offending people with rude announcements that are bound to damage relationships. Or ask a couple of trusted people who also have the personality for it if they would just keep their eyes out for trouble and during the reception if they see someone that they know isn’t invited, have them ask that person to leave.

This is just no. No way.

If I ever got one, I’d write “GOOD. Enjoy your mistake! Happy 5 months of marriage, may at least 2 weeks be blissful and without arguing!” and mail it back. Or something equally nasty and immature. I don’t really care what people think of my kneejerk reaction. A big slap of “get over yourselves, I doubt either of you are so fabulous that people will be breaking doors down to crash your wedding that not invited notices are needed” would do a couple sending this out a good dose of putting themselves in perspective, it reeks of narcissism and self-importance. Everyone should mail them back with commentary if you ask me.

Post # 8
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

does anyone have an example of the not invited notice? this is nuts but i would love to read the wording on how you inform someone of this. I need a laugh!

Post # 11
1282 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@lindseyl06:  I kinda get it though.  As the article said it used to be if you didnt get an invite, people would understand they werent invited.  Nowadays people tend to stalk the bride and groom when they find out and assume they are invited.  On the other hand I would be offended too if i got one.  I think it stems from the whole social media thing….. Not everyone has to know every detail of your life on FB and Twitter.  I’d be hard pressed to find a lot of people on my very limited fb account that actually know our wedding date because I don’t plaster it all over.  Never posted a pic of my ring on there, and very rarely even talk about the wedding.  I just keep private things private I guess, and I dont want to give anyone the option to assume they would be invited to the wedding.  I get it though because we have been bullied into inviting a handful of guests because so and so mentions we are getting married to so and so and they see us and say, “hey we are looking forward to the wedding.”   

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