(Closed) An engagement ring? No thanks!

posted 5 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
1092 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@lealorali:  It’s interesting I guess but I think the symbolism behind an engagement ring has changed over time. I don’t think she can apply the initial theory behind it to modern use.

Also, I don’t agree with her theory that because people wait to get engaged until they feel financially stable indicates that marriage is only for the uppercrust. That is ridiculous. It’s only sensible to feel financially stable enough to make the next move, however much money you think that may be.

Post # 4
1127 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Ha!  I read this, too, this morning, and my own blog post today is in direct response to it.



Post # 5
3638 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

This comment is meant as a bit of fun, I haven’t even read the article:

Oh come on, it’s the one sexist tradition that actually works in our favour! We get a diamond ring before being married and the man gets NOTHING. How many other traditions are like that?


Post # 6
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I love my ring, I kind of agree though. I’m more feminist than not. I always pick on my fiance saying he gave it to me to “claim me as his own”, jokingly but I agree with @Everdeen it may be sexist but it totally works out in our favor! 

Post # 7
1211 posts
Bumble bee

Wow, she’s so suprised that more people don’t think of her lack of ring as some huge radical statement? Maybe because they don’t CARE? They’re probably just thinking, “you do you”. *eyeroll*. No one really cares what is or what isn’t on anyone else’s finger.

Post # 8
434 posts
Helper bee

I just want a ring so that the world can see I’m taken and committed. I don’t want a diamond. I don’t think I care if he proposes with a ring or not. Or if he even proposes – by the time we are ready to start planning a wedding, we will have been talking about marriage for the vast majority of our relationship and it would be a formality. I’d be happy if we just started talking about it while cuddling in bed and decided mutually to start planning. But I still want some sort of ring to signify that I have someone who I care about deeply and am spending my life with. On a daily basis I want to yell out to the world how much I love him, and seeing as I can’t realistically do that, the ring is what I have to do that for me.

I think that’s a pretty feminist standpoint. The same things can mean different things to differnet people.

Post # 9
2664 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - Ketchum, ID


@lealorali:  I honestly think it’s kind of a dumb article. Look at her being so ~edgy and cool and different~ I want a ring because I want a ring, not for any other reason. The ring isn’t what makes me engaged, and it certainly doesn’t mean my SO owns me. No one will ever own me. 

@MrsGolden2Bee:  +1000

@Kir32:  “I don’t think she can apply the initial theory behind it to modern use.”

+10 yes, this.

Post # 10
182 posts
Blushing bee

the part that stuck out to me is where it says only women wear engagement rings. I know a lot of women who have fiances who wear a band to show they are taken. (While personally I think male engagement rings are unnecessary there is the option)


and I don’t know about you bees but the only time my husband talks about ownership is when he says “you told me you’d pack my lunch for me when I put a ring on it and I did!” Haha! 


i love my ring and its the best way to not get hit on. 


EDIT: and also one time turning a rough argument my husband said to me “if you ever doubt how much I love you look down at your damn finger and that’ll tell you” 

Post # 11
92 posts
Worker bee

@lealorali:  sounds to me like the person just wanted an iPad. If she was indeed wanting to stay away from the sexist “contract” of an engagement she wouldn’t have still required an iPad in my opinion.

From my experience the ring is an old tradition but often times the man WANTS his girl to be able to brag about the ring. he gets to hear about how good he did and everyone saying how beautiful it is. I told my boyfriend I didn’t need an expensive ring and he is insisting he wants me to have something I’m proud to show off.

Post # 13
3082 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@lealorali:  really? Maybe different guys have different philosophies. My fiancé got me my engagement ring because he knew I’d love it and he bought the carat size in the display ring because he wasn’t sure it would look as nice as smaller. It wasn’t a statement of his wealth or that he wanted to be showy. It was “she wants this one, I want to make her happy, let me buy it.” 


Post # 14
107 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

My fiance didn’t spend 2 months salary for my e-ring but I love my ring anyway. I agree that at times women get stuck on how big the rock is but I feel its still needed as a sign of commitment. I also understand that e-rings aren’t for everyone but I don’t think its a dated tradition. 

Post # 15
1231 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

The Bee is usually a pretty traditional place (nothing wrong with that) that’s pro traditional weddings…it’s interesting to read other perspectives. Even if this symbol has changed meaning in recent years, its important to know where it comes from.

Post # 16
3424 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Heatherliak:  haha my husband says the same thing to me:)


Sigh…I’m irked by this article. 

My husband gave me a beautiful ring as a symbol of his love for me.  It also happens to be pretty substantial as far as size and price..why? Because he could. It’s as simple as that. 

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