Post # 1
My problem is that my girlfriend is bringing her child age 9 to our wedding instead of her husband. I had wanted to have a child free wedding but was over ruled by my dad because his sister has 2 young children and all the other cousins were coming. I agreed to have first cousins only come. Now my girlfriend stated in her rsvp that she was bringing her daughter and not her husband, I have many friends & family who were told their children couldn’t come. My friend didn’t call and ask me if this was ok. What should I do. I am going have others wonder why her child is at my reception and their children couldn’t come
The invitation was addressed Mr. & Mrs so & so. They have 3 children she is bringing her oldest and I guess her husband is staying home to babysit the other two.
Post # 3
You should call her and let her know that you only want those very few children at the wedding.
Post # 4
Yep, call her and indicate that it is an adult wedding. If she makes any comment about the couple of kids there, tell her they are children of close family members.
Seriously what the hell are wrong with people?!
Post # 5
I would call her to clarify things with her (did your invite say: Friend’s name +1; or Friend and Husband?)… One way or the other, a phone call is probably the best option.
Post # 6
My husband’s cousin did this, and we had an adults-only reception (cost-wise, there were too many kids in the family to include them all). She RSVP’d with her daughter (4, I think?) instead of her husband. Someone called or emailed, and said we’d love to have her at the ceremony; all were welcome. Unfortunately, we weren’t planning to have kids at the reception.
Post # 7
Tough one! I think many people don’t understand common wedding invitation etiquette. It’s not taught, and unless you’re involved in planning one and have been to quite a few, you might not even realize you’re committing a wedding faux paux! Your friend probably doesn’t know about the “No Kids” rule, so it’s best to run it by her. I can see it her way, too. It’s tough finding a trustworthy, dependable babysitter nowadays, and cost might be an issue with folks. I can see it being an inconvenience. But that’s not your problem, and if she really wants to go to the wedding, she’ll find a babysitter so she and her husband can go. If she still insists on bringing her daughter, be apologetic, composed but firm. If she really is your friend, she’ll understand.
Post # 8
I would call her and say that it is an adult recption only with only a few family exceptions. There’s a lot of guests that do not like this but it is your wedding and your choice. Escpecially since the invite was addressed to the Mr. and Mrs! Maybe some people just do not know any better
Post # 9
I would call and explain the situation. When we had friends who didn’t have a plus one but asked to bring one we put it off on the budget and that seemed to help.
Post # 10
thanks everyone, I did call her but she had already made reservations so I can’t have her cancel and not come, I’m just really surprised we’re already had 2 other friends rsvp and include their children I had to call them to say no they can’t come, they were all 3 and under. My mom said if anyone complains to me about her being there to just send them her way and she will explain. She also rented a suite at the hotel and has arranged for babysitting for the younger kids, so now we’re going 7 & up we’ll make an exception. I have to laugh though, I’m one of 5 kids and my mom can’t believe parents don’t want a night/weekend and leave the kids at home. Thanks again everyone
Post # 11
@mbmjwm: I’m also surprised by the amount of people who don’t want date night!! I’ve had so much push back regarding no kids at my wedding, even after I explained that I would pay for babysitting. I just don’t get it.
Post # 12
They really want to bring their kids!!! I think they want everyone to see how they have grown. I had one guest just say she wouldn’t come but she would send her husand and the kids. Thanks! I don’t even know them like that.