(Closed) An ode to passive/aggressive comments 2013

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 32
Member
2831 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Me, totally joking with my assistant who has been sick the entire duration of her now 5 months of pregnancy: “Yeah, wow, seeing you sick every day and knowing that I’d have to go off my preventatives and have to also deal with a migraine every day, I’m not sure I really want kids – you look miserable!”

Her: “Well, if you aren’t willing to suffer a little and sacrifice for your kids, you’re right, you aren’t ready to be a parent.”

Me in my head: “Bitch”

Post # 33
Member
2444 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Lodge

Oh forgot all about when I was pregnant with my oldest son.  Conversation with grandma went something like this:

Grandma: What names are you thinking of?

Me: Gavin Kelly

Grandma: I don’t like that. Kelly reminds me of your cousin Kelly too similar.  You should have his middle name Michael after your dad.  Its a family name plus biblical.  All your names are biblical.

Me: Ok but I have a cousin Devin Michael, and you don’t think Gavin Michael is too similar?

Grandma: Nope.  I’m so glad we chose Gavin Michael for a name.

Ummmm WE?!?!?!

Me: Grandma I’m not naming him Gavin Michael.  My brother wants that name for his son.  I think he should have it since his middle name is Michael and its HIS family name.

Grandma: Ok, well lets find another middle name.  Cindy! (My mom) Where’s your bible?

My mom: We don’t have one (winks at me).

Grandma: Of course you do, every family has a bible.

My mom: Ok then I don’t know where it is.

Grandma: Oh this kid is doomed, illigitimate, no biblical name…..you need to move in with me Nurse Mandie. I cannot have this child going to hell.

I swear the conversation actually happened just like that.  Its still fresh in my mind and it was 11 years ago!

Post # 34
Member
30 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2013

my future Mother-In-Law ALWAYS comments on stuff. Fiance and i are very untraditional and it grinds her sooooo hard. the following conversatiins have happened:

 

 

 

on my brooch bouquet to a relative : “She’s having a bouquet with brooches. She can put fresh flowers in it like a normal bouquet.” said very bitchily.

 

 

 

“What are you going to toss?!”

 

“Don’t you want flowers?”

 

On my dress. “Oh, it’s not white. It’s….antique……. white. Like old lace napkins.” (saying it looks dingy?)

 

 

 

“That corset back is sexier than we used to do it.”

 

“Don’t you want buttons instead of laces?”

 

“It looks like lingere..”

 

On our joint bachelor/bachelorette party: “But don’t you want to do it separate? Go do things you can’t do when you’re married?” (Such as???”)

 

 

 

“You need to let boys be boys.” (um, it was HIS idea?!”)

 

On our joint shower: “But cooking and cleaning are important parts of being a wife and mother!” (like i don’t know where to start on this one….)

 

 

 

In our colors (red and aqua): Isn’t white a better Christmas color?

 

“We NEVER did anything darker than light pink or taupe.”  

 

 

 

“The church is cheaper than where you’re having it.” (She desperately wants us to have it in a church.)

 

 

 

 

 

Post # 35
Member
496 posts
Helper bee

Once, I was showing my mom a new purse I had just bought.  A few days later she asks, “So, did you return that purse yet?”  Mind you, I loved the purse and never said anything about returning it.

 

Another time, we were out shopping and I showed her this cute dress that had caught my eye.  She responded, “Yea, you do seem to like colorful things.”

Post # 36
Member
72 posts
Worker bee

We just told an older, new-ish friend about wanting to get married. Her response? “getting married for what, just to get divorced??” THANKS! She is going through a rough patch in her marriage but good grief. Luckily we aren’t too sensitive. 

Post # 38
Member
337 posts
Helper bee

I cant remember exact phrases but FIs family are quite distressed at the lack of fruit cake. 

Oh and when I told a friend that we were having a dark chocolate layer and a white chocolate and raspberry layer cake I got told that we “HAVE to have another flavour because some people dont like chocolate and they wont be very happy.”

We have three dessert choices as well as cake. We dont HAVE to have anything thank you very much.

Post # 39
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

My FI’s grandmother is a piece of work sometimes.  At his cousin’s wedding she sat saying throughout the ceremony and well after:

“WHAT?  NO PRIEST?  I’ve never heard of such a thing!” (yup, over and over)

We’ll definitely throw her for a loop in 4 weeks.  No priest, and the officiant is a woman.  AND we have a lot of pagan connotations in the ceremony.  This should be interesting Wink

 

My mother recently, regarding our “big honeymoon” being over christmas (I work with the school board so I can only go on vacation at christmas or march break):

“You’re just like my parents were.  THey would go away to florida every year for my birthday.  But you’re here for your birthday, likely to get your birthday money”. (we leave the 21st–my birthday is the 20th)

Yes ma, it’s a conspiracy (btw I AM here for her birthday in November…I think she was talking about Christmas…which I’m NOT CHRISTIAN so it really doesn’t matter to me).

 

 

Post # 40
Member
5879 posts
Bee Keeper

This one of the funniest and cringe worthy threads ever.

Post # 41
Member
35 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2014

My mother, knowing when I suspected I was going to get engaged, gets engaged the weekend before. Then sends me a text “I hope you’re happy about my engagement”.

 

People on the topic of me getting engaged a week later (not because of my mother, it’s when he planned it) “you trying to keep up with mum are you?”

 

argh. 

Post # 42
Member
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

This thread is sad, but at the same time I’m glad I’m not the only one dealing with this kind of thing. My grandma is the queen of passive aggressive commentary lately. 

 

On my save-the-dates: (To my dad) Those were…. interesting invitations…

They weren’t invitations, b. They were save-the-dates and they were supposed to be fun. But I should have known she wouldn’t appreciate fun.

On my wedding, at large: (Also to my dad, after he mentioned it in passing) Oh. That’s still happening?

Um, yes? This was after the snide save the date comment. 

On my sister’s wedding: (To my sister, on the phone when she called to announce her engagement) Oh, well at least there’s lots of time for you to change your mind.

Not Wedding Related, but after my birthday, she never sent a card which hurt my feelings because I’ve saved every card I’ve ever been given. My dad, already irritated with her for something else, mentioned that it hurt my feelings. She said, “Well, I was going to, but when she sent a card to grandpa it was late.”

I didn’t realize birthday cards were a tit-for-tat situation, but in my defense I was only a few days late. This conversation took place over a month after my birthday.

I’m sure there’s more, but I’m trying to block it out. Needless to say, I’m worried about what she will say at our wedding.

 

Post # 43
Member
1988 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

With my work schedule I am at work seven days a week.  In the last year, I have had three weekends off.  A few weeks ago was one of my weekends off so I met a friend in Chicago and got a sunburn at Navy Pier.

 

When I was back at work I mentioned it to another intern (whose schedule is completely different than mine) and she said “I don’t feel bad for you at all”.  She works 4-5 days a week so has 2-3 days off a week, every week.  I wanted to smack her.

 

Post # 44
Member
70 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Love this thread…makes me feel better about my rude mother.

 

My husband and I announce we are pregnant with our second child…my mom goes “Ooo so is that a good thing? Should I congratulate you?”

 

In 2007 I had a very short 8 month marriage.  My ex husband didnt want to be married anymore.  In 2010 he finally served me the divorce papers.  Mind you we had been seperated in December of 2007, living seperate lives, never speaking, the whole nine yards. I found out I was pregnant shortly after being served the papers, with my now husband.  My mom goes weeks not speaking to me so I ask my dad what is up.  He says “this is all very hard on your mother.  You just told her your getting divorced and now your pregnant.  She needs time to get over one thing before she can be happy about the other.”  WHAT?!??!?! She knew we were getting divorced since 2007!!!!  And Im sorry but did I miss the memo that my life was all about her??

 

Post # 45
Member
631 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Rachel631:  omg your mom lol.

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