- 6 years ago
- Wedding: July 2013
I got a ton of good advice on how to keep myself classy at the wedding I went to last weekend with my SO. I can’t tell you how much the support meant to me. The advice was basically “Look HAWT at the wedding…but don’t bottle up your feelings too long or it will all come bubbling out.” Well, I did look good and we did have a great time. And then guess what happened on Tuesday night, literally 2 days after I got home?
It all came bubbling out!!! The conversation was a DOOZY. He thought that since we had such a great time at the wedding, we were doing “great”! I was like, honey, we’re not great. You won’t even TALK to me about the future. Vague promises that there is one don’t count.
It was too long of a conversation for me to tell you everything, but in the end I had said that maybe we should not be talking on the phone every day (we are in an LDR) because I didn’t want to lie to him about how I was feeling, but I was feeling vulnerable and rejected that he was not saying anything about our future. Well, that opened his eyes a little. After that, and some of the other things that I said about feeling super-rejected, we made some progress including him talking about SPECIFIC reasons he is scared of marriage–in my view, a huge step forward.
The next day, he made reservations and asked for time off for my sister’s wedding (something I was worried about him procrasting until the last minute). Today, he had flowers delivered to my office!!!
In closing, you bees are awesome and your advice is like gold. I value these baby steps with my SO and I think this community really helped me to not feel crazy! And speak up for myself!