Post # 17
We invited any boyfriends/girlfriends that guests had been dating for at least a few months. We put all of their names on the invitations. The only person whose invitation said “and guest” was a single woman from my Mother-In-Law office, who wouldn’t know many people at the wedding. She actually chose to invite a friend of Mother-In-Law, which was fine.
I think it’s all about what you want to do! If you can afford to give ‘and guest’ to all adults, go for it.
Post # 18
we are just doing if you have been dating someone for a longer period of time or they are your fiance or husband or wife. Luckily all of my friends are young and single so hopefully they will all pair up at the wedding!
Post # 19
@Neva: Interesting…I do wonder if it’s a regional thing. I’m from CT and ppl are REALLY obnox about certain things. that wedding I mentioned above that I wasn’t even invited to…the bride was a real snoot about not inviting me, like she was almost proud that it was “her day” and she could pick and chose who could be there and who coudn’t. Let me Clear up that I am not that kind of gal… lol! I’m just trying to keep my mom’s cost down b/c we are NOT that kind of Connecticut family! My mom is driving me nuts b/c our list when from 150 to 189. But yeah…maybe it’s a regional thing. I’ve been to a lot of weddings where I didn’t get “and guest” even after I had a BF!
Post # 20
Lol – you don’t have to give me a disclaimer, I’m probably the least sensitive poster here 😛 You won’t offend me if you disagree, I promise but I think you’re even sweeter now for adding it!!
Anyway, I agree that sometimes people feel put out to find a guest when single (although I’m usually my bestie’s +1, lol) but the nice thing about always giving them a +1 is that you give them the option of having someone join them that they’d like to share the day with or declining the ‘and guest’ part and coming by themselves. I would be pretty put out to go to a wedding alone if I didn’t really know anyone (or if they all had dates at the table) but I would probably go to the ceremony and reception and leave before dinner – I hate eating alone or making small talk with strangers while eating. But it could be that I’m just a high maintenance bish….:P Either way, we would make sure that any single person (you couldn’t possibly know all of your friends/extended families dating situations anyway) would be invited with a guest and then add that into our total budget. One other important note, we wouldn’t take money from either of our parents to pay for our wedding, either, so that could make a big difference. When someone else is paying for your wedding then you have that guilt about them paying for extra people or stuff, I think, or at least you have the potential to feel guilty about it I guess.
ETA: I was also going to add that I think it’s regional but I always end up mentioning that so I didn’t want to say it first, lol
Post # 21
We are inviting anyone who has what they consider a significant other, plus the wedding party gets a guest even if they’re single. But if they are definitely single, they don’t get to just bring someone from the fun of it. I’m not paying $50 a head for someone’s friend.
Post # 22
Anyone 21+ got “& guest”. We both have some single cousins, aunts and uncles who are older, and we felt that they should get the option (most of them won’t take it), but it was hard to justify my single 30 yr old cousin getting a guest but not my single 25-year old cousin. If we lowered it to 18+, it would’ve added about 20 more people, which we just couldn’t afford.