(Closed) And You Do What Now?

posted 10 years ago in Beehive
Post # 3
133 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2008

Either a friend or your coordinator for the wedding day

Post # 4
402 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2008

i’d agree with Camille’s suggestion.

 one of the reasons why i was seriously looking into a DOC is for setup…everyone that i trust to carry out my vision will need to be in pictures and helping me get ready/getting ready themselves.

 but i had some volunteers at my church offer to do my decor. so’ll i’ll be rolling with that.

Post # 5
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2007

This was my question as well… we ened up hiring a DOC in a large part because of this.  When my friend got married, she was fortunate enough to get into the hall the day before the wedding and church ladies and friends got everything set up. That was impossible for us- we couldn’t get into the room until the morning of the wedding, so our DOC was a lifesaver.

Post # 6
2030 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

If you are using an outside caterer, this would be their responsibility.

Post # 7
236 posts
Helper bee

We are looking into having a DOC if our catere won’t handle the setup.  We will have most things predone.  But it is an outdoor reception and we can’t put the tablecloths down or set the tables the night before, with our luck one of the neigborhood cats would have fun walking all over the tables and leavign muddy footprints on the napkins.

We are going to prefold the knwpkings and tuck the menu card in them so that they just need to be set out with the silverware and centerpieces.

Post # 8
164 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2007 - Hyatt Lodge, Oak Brook IL

I too recommend going the Day Of Coordinator route. After all, your friends and family are also your guests and deserve to enjoy the day as well. Besides, a DOC would be responsible for producing your "vision" and would pay more attention to how the escort cards are displayed and menus are tucked, etc. etc… And YOU certainly don’t want to be stressing about this on the wedding day either!

Post # 9
61 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2007

whoever you ask to help out, make it easier on them by organizing your things as best you can.  for example, alphabetize the placecards and put them in a box, along with a sheet on how you want them arranged.  a photo is even better.  also, make sure you have someone take down the stuff if your venue won’t. 

we dropped off everything to our venue a week before and i labeled everything with what it was, which room it belonged in, special care instructions, and how it should look.  on the day of, everything was where it belonged, which made me sooooo happy.  we were lucky, they set up everything and also packed up everything for us at the end of the night, so i didn’t have ot assign that to anyone.  but i did have a small excel sheet putting my sister in care of our kate spade cake knife and server, as well as members of the bridal party making sure we had our clothes and stuff.

Post # 10
383 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Day of Coordinator and her assistant..

dont enlist your friends or fam to do this…

Post # 11
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2008

I did it for my sister’s wedding, and it was no big deal. 

If it’s not in your budget to hire a coordinator, what about a cousin or aunt?  I would make sure to pick someone not in the wedding party.

Post # 12
212 posts
Helper bee

yea i agree with MJ.  if it’s minor things like placing place cards + menus… i would just enlist the help of your family.  like for example, i have 2 sisters not in my wedding party so they will be involved in helping me set up those things.  they’ll be there early anyway (for pictures, etc).  i would make sure to give everyone (no matter who you pick) detailed instructions to make it easier for them.

Post # 13
2292 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2008

Our venue (which is also providing the catering) will do any setup that involves the tables where the guests will be seated (e.g., favors, menus, etc) as long as we provide the items and show them how we want them set up.  Any other table decor, including items like the guest book, we have to arrange separately.  The florist and cake people will coordinate with the venue for their parts of the setup.  Any setup that we have to do we have arranged to do BEFORE the ceremony, just to make sure we have enough time and so that nobody has to miss out on the actual festivities.  This is also what we did for my sister’s wedding a few years ago.  For wedding at 4, cocktails at 5, reception at 6 we will have access to the rooms for set-up at 1:00, which we figure should be plenty of time before we have to start getting dressed and ready.

Of course we are doing minimal set-up – the venue is handling all room decor except for flowers, so between the florist, venue, caterer and such it is mostly handled already. 

Post # 14
38 posts
  • Wedding: June 2008

One thing to consider if you do not have the money for a DOC is most places will let you have the napkins a week ahead of time.  This way you can fold the menu card in there and add the ribbon, then ask a friend to place it on the table for you.

I am doing the menu in the napkins ahead of time and having the charicover/linen person place them on each setting.

Good luck!!

Post # 15
1458 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

You should be able to get in the morning of the wedding, anything past 12:00 is unacceptable. They can’t expaect people to skip the wedding to do this. 12:00 day ofis the latest my venue has tolet me in to get set up

You will have to deligate out things to family members however, and make sure you ask if there’s ANY possibility you can get into the venue the night before. They may not be able to tell you until the week of, but it can really help if you can.

My venue says as long as there no "pop-up funeral reception" being held the night before there’s no reason why I shouldn’t be able to come in and do it with the maids and moms. 

And even though I have a linen lady, if I wanted my napkins folded a certain way I would have had to do it myself the week before and deliver them to be laid out by staff.

Count your blessings they don’t do any of that – the prices my place wanted was insaine to do something as simple as place favors out. 




Post # 16
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

My question is related to many of the comments above. Is it really such poor form to have friends and family help out on the day of wedding, if it is all going to be done that morning, before the actual wedding?
My friend is also engaged and she insists on not having any friends/family help out that day and agrees that this is rude.
However, my friends and family (who are not a part of the wedding party) all insist that I must NOT hire a DOC because they WANT to help and don’t want me to pay a stranger loads of money to do what they can do. My cousin is in interior design and has helped me do a lot of event planning so I completely trust her and know she is capable… but more than that, she is completely willing. Is it really bad to put her in charge of setting up the extra things like escort table, menu placement, etc.? I know I have done this for many a friend and family’s wedding and totally loved being asked and able to do it…

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