(Closed) Annoyed… *sigh*

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
642 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I dont understand why girls back out of weddings. I jsut dont get it, but anyway!

I dont think your selfish at all! I have a friend like that, thankfuly she is coming and even flying here to be in my wedding, but for a few months I didnt know if she could make it and I felt like you do.  It sucks!

Do you think maybe her reasons are an excuse? Maybe she can afford it? Her son is 2 ya know…there should be no problem in her attending any of the events.  If I were you I would honestly take her out for coffee and talk about it.  Her reasons just dont sound right to me…I have 2 kiddos and the kid reason would never be an issue. Daddy is around, right!

Post # 4
Member
12248 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

I would be pissed, too, in your shoes! I think it’s pretty awful she can’t bring herself to stand up for you. And you’re getting pretty close to the date!

Post # 5
Member
488 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Maybe you could respond and let her know that you want her to stand beside you on the day of, and you don’t care about the other stuff. i’m sure you can find a dress she’d be comfortable in. She’s not trying to hurt you, she is just afraid to let you down as a bridesmaid

Post # 6
Member
488 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

It is weird that her son is preventing her from attending the rehearsal and reception. Is he such a terror that he cant be in public for a few hours?

Post # 7
Member
2390 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Just make sure she knows you don’t expect her at any of the “extra” stuff, and let her wear whatever dress she wants so she’ll feel comfortable. 

Post # 9
Member
185 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I would be upset.  It sucks when people disappoint you.  I agree that those reasons seem very flimsy and she probably just doesn’t want to be in the wedding (though I’m not sure why?)

If her son was truly the issue but she really wanted to be a part of things, wouldn’t she be expressing that to you and asking how you guys can make it work?  If it was me and I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to find a babysitter for all of the events, I would probably say something like “It is going to be tough for me to get to all of the prewedding events because of my son, so I may only be able to attend the recemony and reception — would you be okay with that or would that make things difficult for you?”  Instead she is just making assumptions about your expectations for bridesmaids.

And “She isn’t close to any of the other bridesmaids?”  Come on ….

Try to think of it this way … at least the person or people who end up being by your side on your big day will actually want to be there!

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