Post # 1
I set my wedding for September 1. My dad is getting married September 29. I’m pretty sure my date was set first. Anyway, he called me a couple of times and it was kind of fun to get each other’s perspecitves on wedding planning. I told him what I was planning and the color scheme, etc. I told him my colors were black, white, and ivory and that I was using a lot of Damask. I asked what his colors were, and he said they would be fall colors, red, brown, etc.
I sent out my invitations (black and white Damask, keep in mind) and a wishing well poem to request donations for our honeymoon in lieu of gifts, if they choose to give anything at all (it is expected to include a registry within an invitation where I live). Not too long after this, I receive his wedding invitation. Much to my surprise, there is the same poem requesting donations to his honeymoon. I sent him a text and told him that it looked familiar, and he said “Yeah, I borrowed it.” I was a little annoyed with this, but it’s kind of a common poem that anyone could find on the internet, so I decided to move on.
A couple of weeks later, his fiance posts some pictures on Facebook of some of their decorations. Much to my surprise, they were black and white Damask, with just a small addition of red! What happened to the fall colors? A splash of red, in my mind, doesn’t constitute “fall colors.”
I’m seriously getting annoyed with this. Obviously there are going to be a lot of the same people at both of our weddings, and goodness forbid I’m allowed to have a little individuality without him “borrowing” all of it. Am I just overreacting here? Since seeing those pictures, I haven’t even been able to talk to him on the phone.
The only silver lining I can see here is that my wedding is first so his will look like he simply copied me.
Post # 3
At least your wedding is first. How frustrating.
Post # 4
That’s shitty. I’m getting married 5 days after my Dad and am making every effort to have mine be very different from his. There is some green in both weddings but when his Fiance said their’s would be sage I made sure mine was apple green, so again they would be different.
Sorry to hear your situation but know that you will be first so everyone sees it the first time with you!! They will be jaded by the second time 😉
Post # 5
I don’t see it as a big deal….he’s the one who will look like the copycat
Post # 6
I can see why your upset, I am happy that your wedding is first.
Post # 7
Truth is he’ll the one who will look like he jacked all of your ideas do I wouldn’t worry. As long as his date remains after yours, don’t sweat it in the long run. I know it’s really annoying but it’ll only reflect on him.
Post # 8
Black and white damask isn’t exactly uncommon these days, but I can see why you’re feeling frustrated. I think the best thing to do is to avoid sharing details about your wedding with your dad for the next few weeks. Like you said, yours is first so if anyone notices, they won’t think you copied him. To be honest, I doubt too many people will notice!
Post # 9
And (as much as it sucks), realistically, do you expect your dad to put together a wedding from scratch? He probably doesn’t have the faintest idea what he’s doing, and doesn’t know where to begin except to imitate you. I’m a little surprised that his wife-to-be is on board with it – I would think she would be reluctant to be seen to be copying you – but who knows?
Post # 10
stop sharing anymore details with your dad, and be greatful yours is first, it will end up looking like the 2 of you co-ordinated with wedding schemes, but it’s your dad at least, just try to be happy for him and move past it.
Post # 11
Don’t tell them anything else. If they ask, just be vague or lie. This seems to happen a lot. I don’t think the intent is always malicious. Sometimes, I just think people hear a good idea and think, “Oooh, I like that!” I know that happened to me several times in the wedding planning process and I was terrified people would think I was copying them with the things I “borrowed”. Just take solace in the fact that his wedding will be old news, since yours is first.
Post # 12
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
Mimicry is the sincerist form of flattery.
Post # 13
Ug, now he’s copying my Facebook posts! Anybody know a 6’3″, 250 lb. man willing to walk me down the aisle!? lol j/k
I’m not going to worry about it anymore…
Post # 14
It’s going to look like they copied you, I know it stinks but no one ever remembers this stuff. It dosen’t take much for the same things to look completely different. Also remember it’s not your dad driving these things it’s his fi. I wouldn’t share anymore!