(Closed) Annoying when other women call you pet names?

posted 7 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 17
Member
188 posts
Blushing bee

@Sea_Ashley:  ah! sorry! I totally do this. I is normal in my culture and region. Between boo sweety and dear I can’t help myself. Especially when I am trying to soften a possibly harsh statement.

Post # 18
Member
3355 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I knew a girl in college who was like 2-3 years younger but called me sweetie, hon etc. She acted like a grandmother though, but it annoyed me.

otherwise, I just find it very patronizing when someone around my age calls me that so I dislike it a lot.

Post # 19
Member
6354 posts
Bee Keeper

Yes, hate it.

Oddly, it only bothers me when the person is trying to be pleasant, not when they’re hoping to use it as a “subtle” put-down.

I’m not sure why.

Also, it doesn’t tend to bother me from elderly women.

So, just young or middle-aged women being pleasant. I think it’s because it suggests a false sense of intimacy we do not have and that makes the whole interaction feel fake.

Same thing as when a (straight) girl I only met a week ago sends me texts/emails that are signed “Love, ThatGirl” or “XOXO”

Like… genuine much?

I know it’s a common way for women to bond with each other (overexpress intimacy) but honestly I don’t like it, and I just prefer to accurately express intimacy.

Post # 20
Member
5658 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Depends on who it is, there are certain people around my office that do it that makes me want to slap them. For awhile also one of the admins in HR would give me kiss faces when she saw me. Like “kiss kiss dear” type thing I think. It grossed me out, she finally stopped doing it. EW

Post # 21
Member
4272 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

My girlfriends and I are guilty of this. Of course lately I have been getting “Mama”. It dosn’t bother me, I enjoy it.

Post # 22
Member
2093 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

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@MsJ2theZ:  LOL. I do this to my dog so that is what made me think of that. It would gross me out too! And at work?!

Post # 23
Member
751 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Uh oh. As a nurse, I tend to call most of my female patients “Sweetie”, especially the older ones. I just do it because I am trying to convey sympathy. But if it is this annoying, I guess I should stop. 

Post # 24
Member
5658 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

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@Coral99:  Yeah totally inappropriate! And I could have reported her but I do like her as a person and I knew she was just doing it in a friendly way. I figured if I looked away every time she would get the hint, and she did.

Post # 25
Member
5658 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

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@Stargaze31:  This is a totally appropriate and endearing quality in a nurse. If I’m in a hospital bed I WANT you to treat me like I”m your daughter or best friend!

My coworkers on the other hand, no, just no. LOL. I also think it depends on the name. Do not call other women babe. That is a name reserved for intimate relationships IMO!  it’s just WEIRD!

Post # 26
Member
1349 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2019

I think it all depends on context.

If it’s being used to be rude or condescending? Then hell no.

But honestly I’m kind of a private person. Unless if we’re really good friends, I don’t want you to give me a pet name, hug me, be close to me, or be anywhere in my personal space.

Post # 27
Member
6014 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

I’m used to older ladies calling me sweetheart or honey at the grocery store or something.  Recently, a few times, younger girls are calling me Honey or sweetie… um i guess it’s better than m’am but still icky.

Post # 28
Member
492 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I use pet names ALL THE TIME!! hon, sweetie, pumpkin, pumpkin head. I call my bffs, family, and Fiance pet names almost constantly. No one has ever told me that they don’t like it. But this area is very “miss, hon, boo” and all that. I actually like being called pet names. I think it’s more fun and makes for a much more colorful conversation and interaction with people. 

But I’m a very animated and entertaining person.

Post # 29
Member
2143 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I do this. Oops haha. But I also like when people call me pet names! My SOs friend calls me sweetheart (only a year older than me) and I actually love it 🙂 

Post # 30
Member
2838 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

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@Nona99:  +1.  I was born and raised in the South. This is how it’s done and it’s not meant to be condescending (you have to listen for tone… tone can imply condescension).

 

The only name that annoys me is when my supervisor calls me “kiddo”.

Post # 31
Member
2564 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

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@Coral99:  Awesome.  If it was being done to me this way yeah, that would annoy me.

But friends calling me “sweets”, “love”, etc.  I don’t mind.

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