(Closed) another invitation wording post (help!)

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1403 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Here’s what we did, if it helps.  It was slightly less than formal because we didn’t include middle names, we gave equal weight to both of our parents, and we didn’t spell honor with a u!

BrideFirst BrideLast
&
GroomFirst GroomLast

Together with their parents

BrideFatherFirst & BrideMotherFirst Last
GroomFatherFirst & GroomMotherFirst Last

Request the honor of your presence
As they are united in the Holy Sacrament of Marriage

Post # 4
Member
1689 posts
Bumble bee

So, there are many circumstances where a mother may not be available to, or may not be able to host a wedding reception for a daughter. The nineteenth century and early-twentieth century etiquette writers assumed that in these situations an aunt or other relative, or a respected friend of the family, would step up and offer to host the wedding; and they provide variations on traditional invitation wording that make it clear the hosts still have the honour of being the hosts, while avoiding suggesting that the bride is Mummy’s little darling. You might consider adopting one of those variants, along the line of:

============================

Mr Thomas Banana and Mrs Jana Banana
request the honour of the presence of

<write-in line for guests’ name so that you don’t need that inner envelope

at the wedding of
Ms Anna Leanna Banana
and
Mr John James Handsome Guy
son of Mr Henry Guy and Mrs Mary Guy
on &tc.

=====================

You can leave off the “Ms” and “Mr” from any and all of the names if you want to be modern and informal (I wouldn’t, but I have never in my life wanted to be modern and informal!) and you can leave off the “son of blah blah” if you want to be traditional and aren’t afraid of hurting the inlaws’ feelings — which I would do, because including it makes your fiance look like he *is* Mummy’s darling while your name is out on its own all independent.

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