(Closed) Another question… online rsvp’s

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1629 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

We have a wedding website that has and RSVP option, so we’ll definitely include that, and probably include a name and phone number to call so our bases are covered.  I think it depends on your group of people.  I know most of my friends will appreciate the convenience and the older crowd can do the phone thing if they’re not comfortable with the internet.

Post # 5
1243 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

We set up an email address for RSVPs (I like the wedding website idea as well) and used my parents phone number as well.  I made an insert in our invites that said “The favour of your reply is requested by October 31st.  We have reserved two (or one) spaces in your honour” and then stated our email address and the phone number. 

I will say this, we had a 100% response from our guests.  We heard from everyone.  Most people used the email RSVP, but the guests who don’t have computers or who aren’t internet savvy just called my parents (most of them were family or friends of my parents, so no issues there).  I was really pleased that I didn’t have to call anyone to chase them for their RSVP.

Post # 7
1696 posts
Bumble bee

To me (since I pre-date the innovation of “reply cards”, which I detest) the “traditional” way is to use my own note-paper and the return address on the invitation itself, and send my own note. One does this for all formal dinner parties, by the way, not just weddings.

In my teens (the fifties) when we were rebelling by getting all modern and efficient, Amy Vanderbilt and a few of her fellow etiquette revisionists decided it would be acceptable to let people R.s.v.p. by telephone. The notion was born of printing the phone number (shock!) right underneath the R.s.v.p. in the bottom corner!!! (Of course in those days, truly formal invitations were no more permitted to say “R.s.v.p.” than they were permitted to say “Formal dress” and for the same reason: you were supposed to trust your guests’ to know their manners).

So nowadays, when one of my parties isn’t over-the-top formal, I put both my email address and my voicemail number in the “R.s.v.p.” corner of the invitations. You could certainly put an R.s.v.p. website URL there as well.

Post # 8
646 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’ll be using primarily online RSVP for my wedding.. On the reception card, it will say “To RSVP and for more information please visit http://www.ournames.com

I’ll be printing a separate RSVP card, but only including it invites going to those who I think would have a hard time with the online RSVP. (I may even just include San Francisco post cards as the RSVP cards, as it is a “desination wedding” for most of my guests, even though I live here…)

I know it’s non-traditional, but websites like weddingwire.com allow you to upload your guestlists for multiple events, create reports about who has/has not responded, and will even put the “yes” guests into a seat-planner… And the BEST part is that it will only let you RSVP for the names listed on the invitation, so no one can add a plus one!

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