(Closed) Another "thought he was gonna propose" heartbreak.

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
817 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Maybe he wants to give you your perfect moment and that wasn’t it. Maybe he wants it in a more intimate setting. He may have been ready to do it and had anxiety because of all the people. I know my Fiance has large group issues. Give it time. Your special moment is coming.

Post # 4
Member
238 posts
Helper bee

Hang in there darling! 

Post # 5
Member
6256 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2014

I think it’s really good his mom is on board. Things that sound like nagging and ultimatums coming from the Girlfriend can sound perfectly sensible coming from the mom.  Sometimes moms can light a little fire under them when they need it. 😀

Post # 6
Member
3170 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

So sorry!Frown I know the wait sucks a lot but I promise that the second it happens it will be so worth and you won’t even remember the wait being as awful as you feel right now.

Post # 7
Member
1855 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Definitely give it time.  I’m sorry you’re feeling disappointed, but it is clear that you and your Boyfriend or Best Friend are very serious and close with each other’s families.  It will happen.  It may happen tonight, or next week, or next month, but it’s coming.  He may have some other vision for your engagement. 

And keep in mind that the hints are not always clear; I would have put money on the fact that my Darling Husband was going to propose last Christmas (so many hints), and instead of a little square box, I got a stripper pole.  Yeah.  Now, my proposal came two months later and it was bigger and better than anything I could have imagined.  Did I have a moment at Christmas time that was less than pretty?  Yes, but I wish I hadn’t because I knew he loved me and wanted to spend the rest of his life with me and I should have had faith in that.

((hugs))

Post # 8
Member
148 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Just try to have comfort in knowing that the parents know it’s coming so Im sure he’s told them something! It will be soon! Try hard not to be upset, I know its hard. Hugs

 

Post # 9
Member
239 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I know it sounds impossible…but try not to focus on it too much. It reminds me of the silly idiom of “a boiled pot doesn’t boil.” Of course it technically does, but the sentiment is true. Let him surprise you, don’t look for all the signs and let yourself get swept up in it when it happens. Don’t push too hard, it can massively backfire. Deep breaths, go for a run. It’s what I do when the voices in my head get too loud. Hugs!

Post # 10
Member
1399 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Maybe he didnt’ want to propose in front of your families. I wouldn’t have wanted Fiance to ask me in front of either of our families. Orrrr maybe he’s waiting to Christmas or New Years. Hang in there! 🙂

Post # 12
Member
24 posts
Newbee

I completely understand. Just went on a super romantic trip with the boyfriend that seemed like an ideal opportunity and…nada. Oh, waiting.

I like to think that they do really have some kind of sweet, personal proposal in the works.

Post # 13
Member
1448 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@Beeyoutifully Me:  Yes, you’ve been waiting a long-ass time.

“He asked me what was wrong because he could sense I was a bit distant, and I just told him I was so tired from the huge event.  I just KNOW he probably knows why I’m a bit down, so why even ask?”

Men won’t ask questions to things they know the answers to.  Now he probably thinks that “Oh, Beeyoutiful is just tired,” even if he suspects something else.  Would it really have been so much to say, “I was anticipating us getting engaged last night and am disappointed it didn’t happen.”?

If his family is on board and your family is on board I think all you need to do is wait some more for your fellow.

Post # 14
Member
3885 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Beeyoutifully Me: “This just hurts a lot.  I’m trying not to think about it, but it just feels like such a let down.  I feel like he’s thinking more about HIS proposal and perfect moment and less about how I feel waiting, and waiting, and waiting, and waiting…”

Well you have to look at it from his side too— it’s his proposal too, not just yours, and chances are, your ring is one of the two or three most expensive things he’s bought in his entire life, maybe even THE most expensive thing.  You have to let him have his say in how it’s going to be done, or you have to cough up some money too, and agree together on how it’s going to go down. But don’t overlook that HE is getting engaged too, and it is perfectly acceptable for him to want to do it HIS way, on HIS timing. 

Post # 16
Member
3420 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Manhattan Church Rec Center

*hug* he better have something good up his sleeve

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