(Closed) Anthropologie gift from my sister

posted 10 years ago in Emotional
Post # 32
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2009

Good lord, they’re just towels.

Post # 34
Member
1275 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I think its nice that your sister made the effort to get you a gift, especially from a store that you like. Don’t be so overwhelmed by wedding planning, not every item you get should go towards the wedding. Just because she saw your line item sheet doesn’t mean she can’t get you a gift. You should appreciate the gift and if you really can’t use it, send it back to her instead of shadily selling it online. You can’t hold a grudge against your sister for doing something nice, if she is more financially able. 

However, I do understand clearing space in an apartment. If I were your sister, I’d at least like the option of taking the towels back because maybe she would offer up something you can use in its place, even for your wedding. 

Post # 35
Member
2312 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Sooo… since you’re so hard up for space that you will have to sell the tea towels to free up the space they’d take up, and you don’t appreciate people “blowing money” on you if they’re not contributing to your wedding, I’m going to assume you’re requesting that your guests do not give you gifts for your wedding?

Post # 36
Member
5887 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2012

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@sfchick: your sister has 50 million dollars?? screw the 500 square feet…i’d move into her pool house! lol

Post # 37
Member
4304 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

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@sfchick: I wasn’t talking to you in the first sentence which is why it said @kitzy.  *shrug*

 

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@Bostongrl25: Very rude. 

Post # 38
Member
5887 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2012

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@sfchick: this is a community of helpers, and when someone is venting and we think they may be making a decision they might regret later, we chime in to help you out.  whether or not you follow that advice is of course your decision, but i don’t think anybody is giving advice from a malicious standpoint.  we call each other out on our b.s.- and honestly, i appreciate that. i wouldn’t want everyone to passively agree with everything i say- that’s not a conversation- that’s a speech from a soapbox.

Post # 39
Member
250 posts
Helper bee

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@ohheavenlyday:  Oh man!  I was just a couple minutes too late.  I came on to post, “Wow!  I hope nobody decides to buy you a wedding or shower gift since you can’t manage to find the room for a few tea towels.”  A little too late Laughing

Post # 40
Member
827 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Sometimes it frustrating but what someone else wants to do with their money is their business… I used to have a friend that would chide me (on more than one occasion) for getting pedicures once a week and would tell me she could eat for a week off of what I spent on my toes. 

Talking over your wedding finances with someone does not mean they are obligated to help you out. 

Sorry, but I’d be pretty sad & offended if you returned/sold a gift from me as well 🙁 

Post # 41
Member
3125 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

When it comes to presents, I love receiving something nice that I couldn’t or wouldn’t purchase for myself. I think of it as a nice treat. I wouldn’t expect anything anway so to get something “extra” why not have it be something decorative instead of functional? You sister is very sweet to buy you a gift- I don’t receive or give anything to my sisters at any time other than regular gift giving evets.

Post # 42
Member
59 posts
Worker bee

If the towels still have tags, you can probably take them back to Anthro for a credit/cash.

The others have already given you good perspectives, but I’ll also add this little story. My friend was laid off earlier this year. She is financially strugling. I gave her a grocery gift card for Christmas because it was practical and useful given the situation. I also gave her a set of expensive hair products from a company she loves. Does she need fancy curl defining pudding right now? No. But she loved it, she actually teared up. She said it helped her feel “normal” and not defined by her unemployment.

Sometimes, people are just trying to give you a treat.

 

Post # 43
Member
229 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

It seems like she was trying to give you a little luxury – something that she knew you’d like but wouldn’t ever buy for yourself. Given the shaky ground on which your relationship currently stands, I would feel like it was a rejection of a peace offering if you sold it. Accept it graciously, since it puts you in no tighter of a financial spot than you found yourself before.

Post # 44
Member
1019 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Return it for store credit and use it for a top for the rehearsal dinner.

 

Post # 46
Member
2103 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I’m sure once the wedding is over and the stress of planning it has resolved you’ll be able to take a step back and realize how ungreatful this post sounds.  That’s a really sweet and lovely gift you received.  I wouldn’t ever expect a sibling to pay for any part of my wedding. 

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