- 5 years ago
Does anyone have experience with an antisocial boyfriend? My main issue is that I and my close friends find it wierd that they don’t know him better…after I’ve been daing him 7 years. Is this unusual?
I would like my friends to know and like him too…being a couple in other people’s eyes can be important. When my friends invite me to things, almost no one asks him along too. I don’t blame them, because after saying “Mr.Green should come” several times, and him never coming, it gets old.
Boyfriend or Best Friend and I went to middle and high school together and only became friends + started dating after graduation. We are the same age. Dating officially began with a 3-year LDR from 2007-2010 – our last 3 years of college. We have now been in the same city for 2 years, living together for 1 year.
Mr. Green has little to no interest in meeting or spending time with my friends, ever. Most of my friends are female, so he says “It’s girl time”. Even if a guy is coming, he will still give every possible excuse to not go. Which is usually whining about being too tired or needing to “study” for certification exams (CPA), which he is actually busy with 50% of the time. When a social event arises, it’s always study time.
Our rule has been “2 weeks advanced notice”. With how mid-20s people socialize, that does not leave me with many opportunities to get him to come. He also finds it too draining. We attend a total of 4 – 6 social events together per year. In contrast, I meet up with friends every weekend.
Admittedly, he is introverted, and has a small circle of very close friends, all of whom he keeps in touch (daily) through IM and email.
Do you find this situation strange? If you were me, what would you do about it?
P.S. I think this is the glitch in our relationship. Outside of this, between him and me individually, we’ve been able to negotiate and solve problems and life questions that come our way, so I think the fundament is strong, but the outside perception of him is lacking.