Post # 1
So, I have a feeling that the proposal will be coming this summer, and if so, we’d get married next June. I am already thinking about the ceremony and being in front of all those people. It makes me REALLY ANXIOUS. We both actually have social anxiety. When I think about marrying him, I get really excited. When I think about being in front of 80 people doing it, it gives me knots in my stomach. Does anyone else feel this way?
I worry about walking down the isle and everyone staring at me- what if I trip on my dress? Also, when I get really nervous, I go bright red! (I’m sure that would look great in photos lol. Sometimes, when I say my SO’s name I’ll goof and call him my cats name. What if I say “I take you, Smokey” (cats name) lol
Does anyone else feel like this? I was thinking when we get engaged, we could both go to some type of public speaking coaching session to calm my nerves? I’ve thought about doing a small ceremony, but I know SO wants a larger one, and so do I. I just worry about my nerves.
Post # 3
I remember with my first wedding many years ago I felt a bit like this….my skin would flare up red same as you….when I picked my dress I didnt want something with a bare chest as guaranteed I would be red and blotchy….so I picked a dress with lace across the chest area…that stopped me from freaking out about that so I was calmer all the way around..as for soemthing funny being said in the ceremony that is just life:) It makes for a more memorable occasion and keeps it unique…who wants a cookie cutter wedding anyhow:) Standing up in front of the Vicar I didnt feel like everyone was watching me at all…it was just my fiance and I and the Vicar…even though the whole church was filled…I was nervous speaking, but you are just repeating what the Justice of the Peace or vicar says unless you write your own vows..I made a little blip and laughed at it and so did others but it was laughing with me and not at me…it all went great and you will have your man by your side so wont feel so alone..Really, its not so bad:)
Post # 4
Yesterday was 4 months until our wedding. We were both like, “WTF!!!!”
Post # 5
@lifegirl: That’s a good idea about the dress. I was thinking about getting a tan before the wedding to hide me getting red.
With saying the wrong thing, I just keep thinking about the friends episode when Ross says Rachel lol.
Post # 6
@memo: haha that just reminded me of our reception…(my first wedding years ago)…I was standing up saying thank you to the bridesmaids or whatever…and when I said her and her fiances name I unfortunately said her ex boyfriends name…was really embarrasing…haha and she DID NOT appreciate it…not trying to freak you out or anything:) I am not worried about such things now and just think it makes your day unique with these little bumps in the road:) Going back to the lace dress: I have seen a lot of bolero type lace things that you can buy on Etsy that can sit over a strapless dress and look amazing….a bit of a tan may help too although I am going to use the tanning cream rather than actually subject my skin to tanning booths:) Happy planning!!
Post # 7
@memo: All these worries now won’t be a problem on wedding day. I suffer from Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Social Anxiety. I thought for sure I would have an anxiety attack being in front of 100 people. The moment the church doors opened and I saw him every nerve went away. It was all excitement and happiness 🙂
Post # 8
were you diagnosed with it? or.. you both just feel anxiety.
i was diagnosed with social anxiety, i do take anxiety meds and see a counselor bi weekly and it helped to ease some of my fear of being around large groups. like you, i always feared the day if i ever marry, having the attention pointed squarely at me. one of my homework assignments in counseling is to ‘face my fear’
for example i use meetups as a chance to meet groups of ppl and get used to socializing and being around them. it definitely helped me ease my anxiety if that day ever comes and my social skills are improving. it doesnt hurt to take a shot or 2 to relax a bit either 😡
i know i would for sure still prefer a small wedding myself. im sure you two will be fine on the day of..
Post # 9
@NickiBee: Yeah, we’ve both been diagnosed. I took meds for it for a few years, but since I’ve stopped. I was thinking about talking to my doctor about something for when the time comes. I used to take Adivan if I had something big coming up, but didn’t find it helped very much.
Meet ups might be a good idea to get used to socializing and having eyes on me. I went to a bridal show last weekend and felt really anxious with everyone trying to get my attention