Post # 1
Member
303 posts
Helper bee
Hey guys,
im just looking for perspective. If anyone has read some of my other posts, it’s quite evident that I’m a little anxiety prone. I’m not ashamed to admit it cause I know that many people suffer from anxiety. I have seen a therapist about it and it had worked wonders and my anxiety levels mellowed out for the longest time. It felt so liberating. Now that I’m 13 weeks pregnant and have passed my 12 week mark, my anxiety levels have really amped up.
I have been terrified that something will happen to the baby , like experiencing a late miscarriage due to an incompetent cervix or having a still birth. I’ve had friends suffer through both scenarios and can’t seem to get them off my mind lately, especially since they both seem to be grieving pretty badly still (even though significant time has passed, although I know the pain will never go away ). I know the odds are on my side but as we all know, we can’t always be the ones to escape the odds and it happens to so many people that don’t deserve that kind of pain. I know worrying will not change the outcome of the rest of my pregnancy, and that it is all out of my hands At this point . However , there are days where all I can feel is dread bc i have so much time left in this pregancy. I really want to enjoy my pregnancy as much as I can. I really don’t want to worry about not bringing home a live baby. But I suppose part of the anxiety stems from the fact that im scared I’ll never be the same if it happened and that i’d never make it through aNother pregnancy again sanely.
anyone out there that has felt the same way or can offer any perspective to help me through these feelings? I have talked to my husband about my fears and while he’s supportive, all he says is that there is no way we will lose the baby And leaves it at that. I don’t want to keep bothering him about it cause I don’t want to steal his joy away about the pregnancy Cause he’s so excited !
I just want to be excited too .
Post # 2
Member
18628 posts
Honey Beekeeper
Have you considered going back to a therapist? It sounds like you need someone to talk through all these fears with.
Post # 3
Member
227 posts
Helper bee
I’ve never been pregnant, but I have experienced anxiety. I have one little idea that might help: you could start going to pregnancy yoga classes. I know that yoga can help with general relaxation, especially if done regularly.
Post # 4
Member
303 posts
Helper bee
MrsSaltWaterTaffy: totally have. Just christmas time is a harder month financially for us a you can imagine , and on top of all the holiday finances , decemeber is when i owe all my professional membership dues for renewal to keep working. Once that all settles down , I’ll likely go back for some theraPy to get me through the rest of my pregnancy. I was hoping to find some sort of perspective in the Meantime so I can enjoy the moments now 🙂
Post # 5
Member
9819 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
You should probably consider going back to a therapist, because the anxiety or worrying (in my experience) could be a lot worse after the baby arrives. I don’t think you ever stop worrying, so it would be good to get a handle on handling the anxiety for more than just pregnancy.
After the baby is born you will worry about it not breathing, or spitting up during the night, or any number of things.
Post # 6
Member
303 posts
Helper bee
kes18: it is definitely in the plans eventually. Like I mentioned to another poster ,Once Christmas and all my membership renewals for work are clued up I’ll be making an appointmeNt. My insurance only covers $300 a year which is nothing considering my therapist is $150/hr. For now i’m trying the exercises he gave me last time and looking for advice in other places to see if that can tide me over until then.
Post # 7
Member
285 posts
Helper bee
I don’t have much to add except to say that you are not alone. I am almost 12 weeks and I feel very anxious and worried a lot of the time. I think the only thing you can do is realize that you don’t have control, and it’s both terrifying and freeing. Today, in this moment, you are pregnant. Try to hold onto the moments and enjoy them, no matter what may come. And don’t hesitate to see a therapist if needed! I find that yoga breathing exercises help me.
Also, Google is not our friend.
Post # 8
Member
423 posts
Helper bee
I’ve got a 7.5 month old and I felt very anxious much of my pregnancy. It is very normal! I would advise you to acknowledge your feelings as normal rather than trying to lock them away. find someone supportive to talk to, and do what you can to ensure a healthy pregnancy – eat right, moderate exercise. I think that’ll help you feel like you are bringing positivity to your pregnancy. good luck! H&H 9 months to you!
Post # 8
Member
207 posts
Helper bee
If you regularly suffer anxiety all the hormones from being pregnant might be making it worse. I have an unspeified mood disorder, meaning in my case that I missed the mark or being on the bipolar spectrum…I can’t really be medicated and I’ve just had to use behavioral tehniques to cope. I was pregnant once for 11 weeks and I was a completely out of control. It was scary.
Definitely go back to your therapist. There is this huge thing to recognize post partum depression…no one talks about the part where being pregnant can cause or exacerbate a variety of mental health concerns. Some people have labeled it pre-partum depression but it really includes more than depression. I didn’t even know it was a thing until it happened to me.
Congrats on your pregnancy.
Post # 10
Member
622 posts
Busy bee
One tip I have found helpful is to make a “worry appointment” for yourself, if you’re finding your whole day consumed with worry/anxiety. Set aside a time for your worry (say, from 5:00-5:30 pm) where you can go over all the worries about your pregnancy. Any time throughout the day when a worry pops up or your anxiety is increasing, tell yourself “I’m not worrying right now, I can think about that later” and set it aside (if you are still concerned, write down the worry to save for later). When you’re considering the things that are bothering you, it is helpful to think about 1) how likely it is to happen, and 2) how you will cope if it does. That helps put things in perspective, and reminds you that you are empowered to face the things that scare you.
I have anxiety too, and pregnancy has not been easy in that regard. The thing is, there is no milestone week at which we can stop worrying. I’m 34 weeks now, and I still worry when I haven’t felt him move recently. (And if the birth will go okay, and what it will be like once he’s born, etc etc.) There’s always going to be something provoking anxiety. We’ve just got to find coping mechanisms that work.
Good luck and congrats on your pregnancy!
Post # 11
Member
11744 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
Aw you poor thing! I definitely echo others suggesting therapy. Honestly, the worry doesn’t stop once baby arrives safely. It morphs into a whole new set of worries And may even intensify with the hormone shift after birth. I think self awareness of your anxiety is a great thing, but gettimg help to manage it needs to be a priority. Being a parent brings a lifetime of worry, but it doesn’t have to be debilitating!
Post # 12
Member
303 posts
Helper bee
Hi everyone. I’ve been trying to reply to you all a few tiMes. I’ll be super embarrassed if They are going through but I can’t see them. So I apologize in advance if I’m double posting.
I just want to thank everyone so far for all Their Input. For the health of my baby and I , I will be seeking therapy eventually. I don’t like being this way and would definitely prefer to be more laid back like many of my friends. I’ve had a bit of a rough past and I just tend to expect the worst when it comes to things that are super important to me.
I dont want to miss out on all that pregnancy has to offer . It’s a work in progress every day.
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