Post # 1
My first high schoool reunion is coming up this year and I’m really nervous. While I excelled in school and overall liked my high school experience (and quite nostologic for it at times), I didn’t really have a group of friends. Surprisingly, despite having spread out quite a bit all over the US (we had a HUGE graduating class) a lot of people are still very close friends and still pretty tight with their friend groups. Which I think is lovely and I’m sure they have become wonderful people, but I feel insecure and sad that I never developed such a group even after high school. I’m scared I will perpetually be that floater moving from group to group to talk to. Most of the friends I had I have fallen out of touch with, and the one best friend I’ve maintained strongly since high school I just had a major fall out with recently and we aren’t speaking (and won’t be for a while).
I still would love to go because I missed out on a number of high school experiences so I don’t want to miss this one too. But I don’t want to feel awkward seeing all these strOngly got maintained friend groups reunite and not have a spot in any of them.
Any tips for navigating a high school reunion? I’m proud of Where I am today and who I was back then, so that’s not the issue. More just anxiety of how to socialize I guess. I don’t want to feel like it’s lunchtime all over again and I don’t know whose table to sit at in the cafeteria.
Post # 2
I think it depends on what you want to get out of the experience. I skipped my 10 year reunion because I’d lost touch with most everyone, and don’t regret it. But I’ve reconnected with a few, so if we did a 15 year, I would go to it.
Post # 3
There’s literally nothing about high school I miss or care to catch up on. However; it’s never too late to find a group of friends to connect with. I was in my late 20’s before I found “my group”. I think if you go into it just wanting to catch up with acquaintances then that’d be a reasonable expectation and you’ll have a nice time.
Post # 4
glutton : my ten year reunion was like that for me.
Essentially the head girl of my year organized the reunion for a Sunday afternoon without realising that one of the biggest music festivals in my city fell on the same day. A lot of people had tickets for this festival including my group of friends I kept in contact with.
So basically I still went and had fun talking to people I knew less from highschool. My highschool year didn’t really have a clique type mentality and people were generally nice. A lot of kids in my year who got bullied at other schools transfered to my school and ended up enjoying school, having no further issues with being bullied and found a large group of friends.
Having said all that, I loved my school… My year was pretty cohesive and nobody bullied anyone. Everyone had a group of friends. I enjoyed high school and my close group of friends was about 20 girls. My graduating class was 150 girls (all girl school). If you enjoyed school abd had fairly OK memories then its worth going and mingling. If you are like my husband and hated school then it may be worth giving it a miss if no one you hung out with are going to attend.
Post # 5
glutton : I didn’t go to mine and have no regrets. I don’t share many of the values of community I grew up and intentionally left. Most of the people I was good friends with are scattered around the country (we all climbed the ladder in our 20s) and none of us are in regular contact anymore.
I think you should go if you want to go, but don’t have unreasonable expectations.
Post # 6
glutton : I’m 30 and went to my 10 year reunion only because one of my friends from high school who I’m still friends with begged me to go. In this day of social media, people keep in touch, so only about half our class showed up. We also had a really big class of 900+ students so it was not surprising that not everyone came. I’m still friends with a couple of girls from high school, but my closest friends are from college. It was nice to actually see people that I hadn’t seen in 10 years, but since I was friends with them on FB, I felt like I already knew what they were up too. I did just talk about things like their jobs and kids, but it wasn’t like hearing them for the first time. I wound up leaving early because it was a bit boring. I had a close knit group of friends in high school and most didn’t come so it was kind of strange just floating around nodding and just saying high. I don’t know if I would go to another reuinion.
Post # 7
There was an attempt at a 10 year for my class. I threw out the flyer the minute it arrived. There is no possibility I will ever attend anything of the kind.
It didn’t happen, lack of interest.
Post # 8
Personally, I wouldn’t go. I had some friends in hs, but had lost touch with pretty much all of them by the time my 10 yr reunion came around. The thought of being back in that cafeteria not knowing if I’d have anyone to sit with at lunch (metaphorically speaking) was really unappealing. It was a no brainer not to attend. I’m now coming up on 15 years post HS grad and have not for 2 seconds regretted my decision not to attend.
Bee, I think it’s time to leave high school in the past. It sounds like you wish you could redo your high school experience, but you can’t do that. A HS reunion is just that – one evening strolling down memory lane. While I’m sure it’s fun for people who actually have close friends to catch up with, that doesn’t seem to be the case for you, so what’s the point? Why put the pressure on yourself to go and have an epic time?
Post # 9
Didn’t go either. I stay in touch with my friends, some since middle school. I do think that I would have been just fine mingling with new and old friends. I’m sure no one was going to make the reunion intentionaly uninviting. I’m sure I would have been happy to see a lot of people I had completely forgotten about. And I’m sure there would be a lot of life stuff to be happy about for my former classmates. But alas, it just wasn’t high enough on my list of priorities. Maybe the 20 or 30 year reunion 🙂
Post # 10
I wouldn’t go if I were you. I didn’t attend my 10 year, and my 20 year is coming up in 2019 and I won’t be going to that either. The friends who I care about have all stayed in touch over the years, and I have no desire to catch up with anyone I haven’t seen in over a decade. I would much rather spend the time and money that I’d be spending on that evening on the present, with people I currently associate with.
Unless you have a burning desire to find out what all of those people are up to now, why bother?
Also, you should watch Romy and Juliet’s High School Reunion.
Post # 11
- Wedding: April 29th, 2016
glutton : If you really want to go, maybe connect with a few classmates on social media and see if they plan on attending? That way you can start a conversation now and maybe have someone to talk to (or even go with) when the time comes. Now I’m wondering if someone’s going to plan one for my year. It will be next year, if so. We had a big class with over 500 students so cliques were inevitable, but I had a few different friend groups. I’d go if my good friends were down.
Post # 12
Don’t be so worried. Mine is also this year and I’ll be overweight, largely pregnant, and not yet married. I hope this makes you feel better lol.
Post # 13
My 10 year reunion is this summer and I won’t be going. I graduated with a class of 88 and even so I don’t remember more than half the people I went to school with. I talked to like 10 people in school and I haven’t spoken with them in 8 years or so. Honestly I don’t think we even need reunions what with the interwebs keeping us connected now.
I wouldn’t be nervous in your shoes. Just go, catch up with the people you want to catch up with, and leave when you’re ready.
Post # 14
We didn’t even have a reunion and I’m super bummed because I wanted to have one! I thought it would be fun to see how unattractive people had aged in person.
I think it would be fun.
Post # 15
Wow, I didn’t go to mine, but I wouldn’t lump myself in with you negative Nancys.
Seriously, we are all different people than we were in high school. We all said or did stupid things. We didn’t all grow up to be the president (yet). Perhaps it would be edifying to know what sort of people your classmates blossomed into. Perhaps your smile will make someone’s day and inspire them to keep on pursing a path of personal progress.
If you have a slight feeling you want to go, just do it. You’ll be surprised how many other people will be in your boat and will be thrilled to talk with you.