- 6 years ago
- Wedding: May 2013
We are planning a wedding in May, and since we are of different cultural backgrounds I would really love to incorporate wedding traditions from both sides.
I am Dutch/Scottish (Second generation as in my Dutch grandparents immigrated here) My Fiancee is Chinese descent on his mother’s side (generic American caucasian on his father’s).
I have been able to incorporate several Dutch elements with the help of my Oma, such as a marzipan filled wedding cake (yum!) and a wishing tree instead of a guest book. My father, uncles, and brothers will wear their formal plaid to the rehearsal, so I have a little bit of Scottish tradition (undecided on the hand-fasting).
However, it has been VERY difficult for me to successfully incorporate Chinese elements. My Fiancee knows nothing about weddings, and my Future Mother-In-Law, while very sweet, does not seem willing to offer opinions even when asked. I’m also afraid of asking her too much for fear of being ignorant/offensive. The only thing she has asked me regarding Chinese elements is whether I plan to print the invites in Mandarin as well as in English. I discussed this with Fiancee and he is against it since he does not read Mandarin and he is the groom. While my Future Mother-In-Law is not very strict on tradition, her family is (I won’t be able to meet all of them until Christmas).
So. I have been doing some research, and I would really like to use the double happiness symbol, BUT I’m terrified of doing this in a way that is somehow innapropriate or offensive!
I had the idea to print it on the napkins for cocktail hour, dark pewter ink on silver napkins, as well as on the menus. Is this an appropriate way to use this symbol? Are the colors acceptable / auspicious? All that I have gotten from my Future Mother-In-Law is “Don’t use white.”
My colors are blush, cream, and silver, so using red is something I would like to avoid, though I know it is a traditional Chinese wedding color.
Any ideas for Chinese traditions/elements I may not have thought of, or other ways to incorporate the double happiness symbol?