(Closed) Any advice on helping conquer procrastination with your partner?

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 32
Member
85 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Oh, wow. It’s as if he could tell I was talking about him: Just got texts that he’s actually doing some things (how does that autocorrect to tgongs?!) that he’s been saying he’d do — one of them has turned into a months-long project that should’ve taken one night, but I should be able to help him wrap it up tomorrow, and then we can put it behind us. And now I will praise, praise, praise him and hope I can get more out of him before this productivity streak ends. (Because it will.)

Post # 33
Member
193 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

The whiteboard is a really good idea, I do kinda the same thing… I write post it notes… and stick them on his computer monitor. That way, he can’t play games on his computer without first being reminded of everything he needs to do…

I try hard not to nag.. but it is very frustrating! To be fair, he remembers the important things!!

Post # 34
Member
143 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012 - the Columns Hotel

We used to have this problem more, and had a few spats about it while wedding planning. But one day as I was leaving town for a work trip, I made him a list in the notes of his iPhone. Since then, he has kept a running to do list, vaguely sorted in priority. I still do status checks and remind him occasionally, but I would say this has mostly killed my nagging.  It has made delegating things much easier, and it’s private not public, and always close at haNd.   It works for us , ymmv.

Post # 35
Member
6737 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

View original reply
@Jamergurl921:  He sounds like he has a problem with willpower.  When you have a stressful job, you use up all your willpower during the day, so coming home and doing things you don’t want to do and need to use willpower to do are much, much harder, since you’re just out of willpower.  There was a radish/cookie experiment that shows the truth to this.  I had a similar problem with working out and eating right – for 2 years I was in the best shape of my life, when my job switched to a very difficult, highly stressful position, I lost all my willpower, would come home and just want to scarf pizza.  Eating grilled chicken and going for a 4 mile run were the last things on my mind.  Here are some links to help you understand it:

http://www.fastcompany.com/1635035/why-change-so-hard-self-control-exhaustible

http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2012/04/the-chocolate-and-radish-experiment-that-birthed-the-modern-conception-of-willpower/255544/

I still think the dry erase board next to his xbox would help.  Maybe get brightly colored markers and mark things in different colors so it stands out.  Or make your own dry erase board (just get a picture frame) and use a very, very bright color paper for the background so it always stands out.  Put what needs to get done and the deadline for it and tell him as you’re writing it, too. 

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