(Closed) Any bees near 40 and with the baby fever despite all logic?

posted 8 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
1701 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Now is not a good time for Fiance and I to have a baby.  He really would like to wait a couple more years and we would probably both be in a better place.  However, I don’t have that time.  We are just going to have to do the irrational thing.  For you, it wasn’t a great idea to have the first two when you did and they are coming out OK!  You’ve already done it so you know what’s involved.  This hetero couple may have to go through all the procedures you do but a baby born out of love starts out with a blessed life.  There is probably a reason why baby fever won’t go away…

Post # 4
1561 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

i’ll be 31 in 3 weeks and he is already 37. Neither of us had been married or had kids before – so obviously we’re REAAAAADY! however. we really wanted to TTC immediately after the wedding – but we have a ton of debt (not wedding debt, but pre-wedding/pre-each other debt) we are trying to pay off (and doing a good job!) but yeah – we don’t want to TTC until we have it close to paid off if not completely.

And ALL our friends are having babies right now (and they’re all younger than us!) and it’s like, “dangit, i FINALLY found the right person to have one with, we WILL eventually – but damnit, we want one now!” yup – i totally feel like Varuca Salt from Willy Wonka – “don’t care how, i want it now!”

so, yeah – little different situation, obviously, BUT i know how it feels to want one NOW knowing it’s NOT the right time.

good luck! and also – even though you’ve been together for 7 years – congrats on finding the love of your life!

Post # 7
7081 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2009

I was 38 when we got married.  If I had waited until the time was right (partner–27 yo at the time– was older or finances were more stable), we never would have had our beautiful daughter.  Sure I’ve had an awful lot of life changes in the past year (wedding, job interviews, pregnancy, baby, new house, new job)… but life is so sweet, and I’m so glad my honey and I have this insanely sweet child together (and I say this while we’re going through teething!)

Post # 8
7490 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

I will be 34 on my next birthday, and I had my daughter when I was 26.  Fiance and I would like to have a child together, but sometimes I think to myself “really?”  Do I really want to go through all of that again when I’m through the diapers, potty training etc?  And then I do get the baby fever. Like CRAZY. 

Post # 9
3762 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

What about looking to foster a baby after you are done with school?  A lot of baby foster situations turn into adoptions.  Just as a thought since having children of your own would be costly and maybe very hard.  This would give you plenty of time to finish school etc without worrying about a biological clock ticking.  

Post # 10
759 posts
Busy bee

Yep! Me, me!!!  I’m 39 with a 14yr  and I’ve had baby fever off and on for about 8 years now.  Even started an adoption but it fell thru.  The Boyfriend or Best Friend is 40, almost 41, and would love to have kids but as you can see we aren’t even ENGAGED yet so I’m not sure if that will ever happen….and that makes me sad cause I always wanted to have a baby and share that experience with the man I’m married to and love (I was a single mom when I had my daughter).  But as time rolls on it doesn’t look like that will ever happen for me… πŸ™ 

But I say go for it, there’s rarely ever a good time to have a baby.  I was a single mom with a low paying job and I did it, so I’m sure you can do it too!  πŸ™‚

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