Any Bees Regretting Ring Choice and size AFTER joining the Bee?

posted 3 years ago in Rings
Post # 2
555 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2017 - Lake Louise Canada

People will generally not show them off online if they aren’t massive so what you see is skewed to the larger side. Many bees with multiple carats are also opting for alternatives to diamond so that they can go bigger. My ring is the biggest of my real life circle but easily bottom 10% for size on the bee. Half a carat is nothing to be ashamed of, and I’m sure your partner put a lot of thought and money into choosing it, I bet it’s beautiful and we’d love to see it.

Post # 3
2037 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

No I do not regret my ring at all. This site could not change anything for me as I got exactly what I wanted.  Other bees have gorgeous rings that I like for them but I wouldn’t wear most of them.  

Post # 4
1036 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: City, State

No, I haven’t. I also would never reject a ring for not being big enough. I love my half-carat but I’ve only posted it once or twice on here. It’s hard though when you don’t get the reaction you expect when you show people your ring.

Post # 5
1404 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2020

I wouldn’t say I’ve had a similar experience, but I do understand what you’re saying about the carat size. I decided early on that I wouldn’t want over a .75 carat stone because I’m a practical person and don’t want it in the way. 

It happened to work out that we’re going to use my grandma’s diamond, which is .4 carats. I’m thrilled about it since it has that special meaning to me and sparkles like crazy! When you compare anything to what others have (money, car, ring, etc.) It’s easy to become disappointed. But the grass isn’t always greener and typically there’s reasons as to why you chose the ring you did. Just remember those things and learn to cherish what you have.

In my case, it helps that my stone is bigger than both my current grandma’s and my aunt’s, and only slightly smaller than my cousin’s. Once the “newly engaged” phase wears down, no one is really going to be looking at your ring anyway. I never looked at anyone’s until we started seriously talking about engagement, which means over 20 years went by before I ever looked at my own grandma’s wedding set.

Overall, I am much happier having a little sparkler than a “normal” or large stone. Besides, most rings look a lot larger in photos vs in person πŸ˜‰ best of luck!

Post # 6
617 posts
Busy bee

I think women on the bee obsess about rings WAY more than people do in real life. Even if I see a beautiful ring irl, I don’t typically say anything because it’s just weird to me to be like “omg I love You ring!” to a stranger. So while I might go on about a persons ring here, I wouldn’t in person. But hey I’m here for ring porn so I can gush as much as I want haha. I have a 1.5 carat equivalent but it’s a moissanite. I bet a lot of women with huge rings have moissy too (mine is considered “huge” in my circle of friends)…not all but a good deal of women on the bee have moissy I’ve noticed. In fact, I feel a bit ridiculous sporting such a huge rock irl because my circle of friends all have much smaller. So it’s just perspective. What catches my eye is a nice WHITE rock! Others, it may be the setting. I think we think about our rings way more than is “normal” since we sit here on a ring forum πŸ˜‚

Post # 7
47 posts
  • Wedding: August 2017

I wish I had found this website sooner so that I could have gotten other bees’ advice on picking out my wedding bands / matching with my engagement ring. I don’t have a ton of girlfriends “in real life” or family members to get suggestions from. 

Post # 8
1164 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

my husband would have been in trouble if I had found this site along with Pricescope prior to our engagement…

Post # 9
5631 posts
Bee Keeper

coco13 :  This and the other ring forums have made a severe dent in my pocket book over the years.  I didn’t know what shrinkage was, had no idea it existed.  Ring envy was always a thing with me. I just didn’t know it would hit me hard core on the forums.  I wish I had found the forums beforehand, yes. 

But here’s the thing-the online community is just a small representation of what’s out there and everything on this forum [and others] are always going to highlight BIG.  Big in the Midwest is not big in New York.  You have to get what you love and what you can afford.  Just don’t ever feel bad because of other people’s opinions.  You were excited when you got it.  If you’ve outgrown that excitement, then try and figure out a way to change it or remake it or get something designed that you do like.  But never let the jealousy of comparison ruin the joy of what you have.

Post # 10
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

View original reply
coco13 :  Do not even be ashamed of your ring.  The Bee is…not a good example of real life rings, sorry, ladies.  The engagement ring my husband gave me is a half carat center stone, and it’s perfection.  Small by Bee standards, but easily larger than quite a lot of rings I see in real life.  Many women don’t wear or have an engagement ring at all.  I’m sure your ring is gorgeous.  πŸ™‚

Post # 11
7 posts
  • Wedding: May 2018

Can I just say that this isn’t what is important? My ring is considered smaller than a lot of people’s and my thought is- it fits my finger perfectly, I love it and my fh picked it out himself and worked very hard to get it- I also told him I’d be mad if he spent over a certain amount bc that’s a nice trip, new things for our house, etc… don’t sweat the small stuff =)

Post # 12
394 posts
Helper bee

In some respects I’m so glad I found the bee because that’s where I found out about moissanite which I went for And which I love. I would’ve ended up with a chain store overpriced diamond cluster if I hadn’t stumbled upon all the information on here BUT in other ways it makes me doubt my decision because so often on here people are being down about moissanite and it has made me wonder if I’m bad for wanting a larger stone than I could afford in diamond. At the end of the day I love my ring and try to take all the comments with a pinch of salt. No one else has to wear it or even like it! But I do wish there weren’t so many haters. 

Post # 15
266 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2020


IM SO GLAD…someone is discussing this.. I went for quality over quantity.. so I ended up with  the BEST F*#*ING….half carat. It sparkles like mad!! πŸ™‚  I loved the 1/2 carats when we first started looking at rings and thought that was best for my 5.5 finger. We ordered it..

to pass the time i started looking at rings on the BEE…and before I even got the ring I knew i would be a bit sad..

Then i got engaged a few days ago …the ring is even smaller than I hoped and since he waited so long aftger getting it for me there is no way to return it..

Plus I dont think we can afford a bigger diamond,right now, without it being cloudy/yellow..ATM Im repressing my feeling because im scared of hurting him..especially because he is so proud of the cut, color, &clarity. Im sure ill grow to love it eventually.

If I never found this form I would be very happy with my ring right now.

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