Post # 77
Member
48 posts
Newbee
Stay at home fiancée here! I stopped working when I moved across the country with my Fiance for his career and don’t plan on going back anytime soon. Fiance loves his job and I love to be domestic! I bake, make healthy meals, make my own soap and candles and all of our cleaning products, garden year round, take care of our dogs, and occasionally volunteer. We are both happy with our situation and I am much happier than I ever was working.
I believe that being feminist is about women being able to choose to do whatever makes them happy. There seems to be are a lot of judgey bees on here who aren’t clear on what feminism is.
I also wouldn’t judge a man who stays at home and lets his wife bring home the money, if that works for them as a couple. Different strokes for different folks.
Post # 78
Member
58 posts
Worker bee
@Soladylike: I do chalk it up to being petty and jealous, and intolerant.
@WestCoastV: She must be referring to the snarky comments about how she’s not a SAHW; she’s unemployed. Snark snark.
Post # 79
Member
1811 posts
Buzzing bee
I’m a housewife! And I love it! I spend my days reading, volunteering, working out, cooking, cleaning, visiting with friends and family, running errands, and keep my husband organized. Very rarely do I have a day where I’m not actively running around. Those days are numbered though with our first kiddo expected in August!
I hold a degree and I worked and supported myself for many years before we got married. For us it came down to the fact that DH comfortably supports us, but between our business, his work for his fathers business, and his work towards his degree he really needs a lot of help keeping everything together. By keeping him fed, clothed, organized, and helping him accomplish his work goals I AM contributing to our household’s financial wellbeing.
Post # 80
Member
1589 posts
Bumble bee
I think it’s important for housewives to make sure they have a backup plan. My friend’s father was diagnosed with cancer in his late 30s so after she watched her mom struggle she learned that everyone should have a plan if god forbid something were to happen to their spouse.
Post # 81
Member
509 posts
Busy bee
Not a Stay-At-Home Wife but I’ve been a Stay-At-Home Mom for the past 13 months and Im returning to work this coming Monday. I Love my job and think I do important work and I make great money.
If I were a Stay-At-Home Wife (not a SAHM); I would probably have 10 foster dogs, 2 horses and maybe even a fostered goat!
But aint that the great part of living in the developed world right now? We actually get to choose! Thanks to all of the strong women who paved our way…we can do ANYTHING we want!
But OP be careful about comparing yourself to women of an earlier generation whether it be the 1950s or 1800s, they did not have the choices you do.
Post # 82
Member
470 posts
Helper bee
@Jessica_Rabbit:
Oh my God, a bunny! I love it! Hey wait, I just realized both of our names are about lagomorphs!
Post # 83
Member
8027 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
I worked at my last job for 13 years up until 2 weeks ago when I quit to be a Stay-At-Home Mom to our 2 kids. Working full time was hard with kids, staying home it a lot easier and nicer. I honestly don’t know what I would do if I didn’t have kids though- they take up a huge chunk of time, so if I didn’t have them, I’m not sure what I would do all day. And if we didn’t have kids, my husband would never just let me stay home. He is pretty awesome to let me be a Stay-At-Home Mom, but a Stay-At-Home Wife would not fly. Glad it works for you though OP!
Post # 84
Member
470 posts
Helper bee
@Soladylike:
You are so sweet. Thank you for your support!
Post # 85
Member
470 posts
Helper bee
@cant.wait.to.be.mrs.d:
You indeed are. A housewife’s contributions are needed on so many levels.
Post # 86
Member
1443 posts
Bumble bee
I would feel weird not contributing financially, and I would also worry about having to make lifestyle changes should I become widowed/divorced.
Post # 87
Member
8469 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
@Bunny_the_Bride: Oh, trust me, I won’t miss it.
Post # 88
Member
2874 posts
Sugar bee
i spent a while not working while i was engaged to DH due to visa issues. we’re now married and im 34 weeks pregnant and going to stay at home with the baby for a bit. once ive sorted out the visa issues…who knows?
but that doesnt mean i havent contributed anything. i own the 3bedroom house we live in (paid in full,mortgage free) so whilst im not paying anything in bills right now…hes not paying anything in rent. i can easily cover those bills if god forbid something happens to DH by teaching a few english lessons (as i live inmexico) so im not worried about the future
Post # 89
Member
3051 posts
Sugar bee
I’m too lazy to be a housewife. Legit. lol I was a part time student/stay at home gf last year due to losing my job unexpectedly & using that time to refocus on school & attempt an accounting major.
After a couple months, my depression worsened, my motivation lessened, I wasn’t cleaning any more than I did while working…maybe cooking a tad more but definitely not coming close to contributing the way I do while working.
I could never do that again. I need to feel like I contribute to society…I don’t feel that helping my spouse by caring for the household is contributing to society. Esp with men, because TYPICALLY (not always) the working woman would still have the household care fall on her lap. She’d just buy the clothes instead of making them.
Post # 90
Member
1344 posts
Bumble bee
- Wedding: October 2013 - Vine Street Church
No way. No. Way. My job may be really trying at times, but I love it. Would I go part time if possible to have more time to work around the house? Definitely. But I could never quit my job and stay at home while depending solely on my husband for any income. I’m not a child — I don’t need someone giving me an ‘allowance’.
Post # 91
Member
4843 posts
Honey bee
I would love it. My only fear is that many women around me that ended up divorced later in life have nothing to fall back on. Like, their husbands moved out and they have no money and no way to work because they have nothing to fall back on. In some cases they can’t get out of an unhappy relationship because of this. I really enjoy the domestic side of things, but I need to be independent.