(Closed) Any one else not live together before?

posted 5 years ago in Traditions
Post # 3
Member
513 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@Kandiss16:  My personal opinion, I think that living together can make or break it. Some people are completely different after you live with them. For example, my fiance had a wonderful friend, but completely horrible roommate. I know, not the same thing as marriage, but still. We bought our home last August after almost 6 years of being together, and we’ll be getting married on our seven year anniversary this year. πŸ™‚ I don’t see anything wrong with living together before marriage, I actually prefer it.

Post # 4
Member
275 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I think it’s good to do prior to marriage. No judgement to those who chose to wait, as this is a personal choice. People can be different when you live with them though. You see the real them and their habits; the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Post # 5
Member
1676 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Due to religious reasons, we didn’t live together before we got married. It went just fine when I moved in with him, and I wouldn’t have had it any other way.

Post # 6
Member
1416 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I’m personally all for taking a test drive before you buy a car, in every sense.

Post # 7
Member
1361 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I am adamant about not living together, I always wanted to wait until my wedding night, but that went out the window early on in the relationship, so I feel like waiting to live together is one of the special things about getting married, its a complete change in your life, and if you’re already doing all the things a married couple does then what is the point kind of. I dont mean to offend anyone who has lived together before being married, it makes perfect sense logistically, it’s just my personal opinion. 

Post # 8
Member
3429 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Kandiss16:  Me..we don’t live together..as we both own homes. when we get married, I will move into FI’s house for a year and then we’ll find a place closer to where my daughter will be attending college. I’m kicking the idea around of renting my place out during that year.  The hard part for me is that my daughter will be staying with my parents to finish her last year of high school( they live across the street from HS). She is excited about it, as her friends all live within a few blocks from my parents, but I’m sad :(. 

 I’m a real estate broker, and I know the market isn’t great so I’m waiting to sell.So complicated!!

Post # 9
Member
3823 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Kandiss16:  Fiance and I don’t live together. We don’t plan to live together until after the wedding. 

 

My ex lived with me for about a year for financial reasons (he lost his job). It can put a lot of stress on a relationship that isn’t going anywhere. If you aren’t talking about marriage, it can really become frustrating. You feel like you’re playing house with no real end in sight. 

Post # 10
Member
133 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

We decided not to move in together and we haven’t regretted it yet.  We have both made efforts to choose wisely and love and respect each other, so even if there are things that take some effort to work out with respect to living arrangements, we are committed to loving each other through them and working them out.  Plus, we find it is adding to the anticipation of finally being married (in a good way)!

Post # 11
Member
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Due to religious reasons, my fiance and I are not living together before we get married. πŸ™‚ He actually lived with his parents until a few months ago, while I’ve lived on my own since I was 18 (I’m now 24). Good thing too, because he’d have to buy a whole bunch of stuff if most of it weren’t mine! πŸ˜› πŸ˜‰

Post # 12
Member
11356 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

Because of our faith and beliefs, my Darling Husband and I did not live together or share that type of intimacy until after our wedding. It was very important to me not to have that kind of relationship with anyone until we were married.

 

Post # 13
Member
4336 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m not a car, and I can’t believe that people have no problems comparing themselves (or their FI) to that as an analogy.

I married H b/c I love him and not because of how properly he loads the dishwasher or how quiet he is in the morning or whatever! We did not live together, and there is nothing I could have learned about him BY living with him that would have been a deal breaker. As the typical “roommate issues” have come up since we’ve been married, we deal with them like adults! (or, try to… haha…)

Post # 14
Member
293 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

We are not living together due to religious reasons….I wish we could because this seeing each other only on weekends suck lol but his pastor wouldn’t marry us if we did. I can’t wait….it’s getting me even more excited for when our day finally comes 

Post # 15
Member
1161 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

We don’t live together and I can’t see how anything I would find out about him once we move in could be that much of a dealbreaker. I don’t subscribe to the “test drive” mentality because in my opinion the test drive is the dating itself, not living together. When you test drive a car you don’t take it home for a few years, take it on vacation, get it detailed, etc…you drive it around the block and then you probably do a little more research to see if it’s a good fit. Then and only then do you sign the paperwork and take it home.

We have been long distance for the past 9 months so I’m really looking forward to being together again and finally moving in, and I don’t feel I would have much to look forward to (other than changing my name maybe) had I already lived with him.

 

 

 

Post # 16
Member
539 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Not living together before, and I’m so glad about it!! CAN’T WAIT! to move in with my will-be-hubby in < 2 months. Worth the wait. ahhhhhh so excited!! πŸ™‚

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