Post # 1
Two nights ago a pregnancy test confirmed I was pregnant. My husband and I are SO excited! We already have a 2 year old son and cannot wait for him to be a big brother.
Still though, Im scared to death. Not about the typical things like money, jobs, If I will be a good mom…etc. In my first pregnancy I was diagnosed with Preeclampsia in my 30th week. To make a looonggg story short I was hospitalized, drugged and finally went through an emergency C-section just to not meet my 3lb baby that I went though hell for, for 28 hours. It was the closest to death and the most traumatic experience of my life. But needless to say I would do it all over again. (But I hope not!)
When finally got to take our baby home we quickly realized he wasnt a “normal” baby and would cry for hours apon hours on end. He didnt have a “hungry” cry or a “dirty diaper” cry. He had a torturous cry that would make anyone think we were hurting him. After numerous doctors visits, scans, and x-rays every doctor just said “He is a premie and a colicy one at that. Just get through it”. This seemed so cold hearted and left my husband feeling helpless and myself in therapy for everything this baby was going through and ultimatly putting me through.
We are now two years down the road with a (thank God!) “normal” 2 year old. Some days it feels as though he has some type of relapse and goes back to making me want to pull my hair out. But most days there is nothing that I cant handle and he seems to melt my heart a little more everyday.
This is my fear for the next baby. Number 1, I’m scared to death if getting sick again and my baby or myself not making it this time and number 2, I’m scared to death this baby will be like my son. I really dont know if my husband and I can handle another very, very colicy, premie baby….as weak as that sounds and yes I am ashamed to admit that.
I heard that most woman who have two kids say that their children are like night and day compared to the other. Is this true? And is there any mothers who had a traumatic pregnancy and didnt with the second???? Any advice or insight will be WONDERFUL! Thanks ladies!
Post # 3
I had a mild pre-e with my first pregnancy. I just had my 2nd son last Sept and had to be induced because my pre-e was so bad that my liver started shutting down. I ended up with an emergency c-section, almost died because the fluids had built up so much in my body that they started filling my lungs, ended up getting pnemonia from the fluid in my lungs and had a very hard time. But!!!! we were blessed with a very healthy, happy and great sleeping baby! At one point, we thought he had colic and I just said “forget it!!! I’m changing his formula!” it was a Sat night and I couldn’t wait to talk to the dr about it. Every single night he would scream his poor little head off for hours!!! but not after we switched formulas!! I went to nestle’s good start gentle formula and it was sooooo worth it!!! But yes! this baby is totally different than my first! He started sleeping through the night at 3months exactly…always happy and healthy and it’s been great this time! PLUS you know what to expect this time around. It’s not all new and you’re not going to panic like first time. I think everything will work out much better than you expect. If you want to talk….feel free to message me 🙂 and congrats!!
Post # 4
My first daughter was very sick when she was born. I had abruption of the placenta and instead of both of us bleeding out (which is what usually happens), her blood went into me. I was ok she was not. She was intubated and in NICU for several weeks.
Daughter number 2 I had uterine hemorrages early in pregnancy, but they healed on their own and she was perfectly healthy.
Personality wise my first was very sensitive and emotional. My second is so easy going. She come home from the hospital and had to wake her up to feed her. They are completely night and day. The second time around it is easier though because you’ve been through it before.
Good luck with everything. What you went throught the first was very traumatic. If you need to vent, feel free to PM me. Try to be as open with your husband as you can be, he proably has the same concerns and you can be there to support each other through this.
Post # 5
I’m in the same boat as you. Im terrified to have another child. I contemplated having any more but Fiance wants another so bad(He’s not the father of my child). I ended up on bedrest at about 34 weeks because I became hypoglocemic and was passing out/dizzy all the time. They ended up inducing me at 39 weeks and was in labor for 20 hours! talk about exhausting. After they gave me my epidural i started passing out, throwing up, and my blood pressure/heart rate went down to someones that was having a heart attack. A lil while later, right before it was time to push my epidural started wearing off. I didnt want to feel anything but was TERRIFIED of the same thing happening as the first epidural. Luckily, it didn’t. After delivery I had stitches (ALOT) and was bleeding profusely. More than normal. They couldnt control the bleeding and i was passing out left and right. At one point the nurses were helping me to the bathroom and i passed out while walking. I soon learned I am borderline anemic. All the sudden when im 21? Yea. Kinda weird. My daughter was also VERY colicy. But only till about 3 months. Needless to say, I am STILL contemplating another child. I know it could have been worse. Atleast my daughter was healthy. But that was enough for me! My sister has had 2 children and she said they were like night and day.
Post # 6
I’m not sure if you’ve read (or seen the dvd) of Happiest Baby on the Block, but it has helped immensely in calming down my daughter. She is a pretty easygoing baby, but for about 2-3 hours every night she just gets really cranky. I tried adjusting her food and sleep, but it seems that she just gets overwhelmed at the end of the day and needs to “blow off some steam” as her pediatrician says.
Anyway, the technique in Happiest Baby on the Block really helps in getting her calmed down when she gets to the point where she just screams for no reason. According to the book, the technique really helps with colicky babies by recreating the womb experience. It might help out, in case your second baby turns out to have some of the same challenges as your first.
Post # 7
Mrs. Spring beat me to the punch, but Happiest Baby on the Block is basically a how to guide for fussy babies.
We’ve taken the 4th trimester VERY seriously, and Ceci really only cries less than an hour a day all told. You don’t have to use all 5 S’s all the time, but it’s great to have options to go to when she’s a little fussy. Between that and babywearing, we’ve gotten through reflux and the bottle strike.
Oh, and I think there should be a 6th S, something like Jager “S”hots (for mom)!
Post # 8
Thank you SO much for all of this support girls! I will for sure have to try out that book! With my first son we found out he was lactose and tolerant AND was allerigic to soy. His perdiatrician said we would have to use Nutramigen as his formula and if that didn’t work we would have to drive to a little farm about 30 miles away from our house to a Goat farm and get Goats milk. Needless to say, I was VERY happy when the new formula worked. Still though, he was a very, very, cranky baby. Even at 2 years old he still gets up some nights 2 or 3 times.
I will be making a trip to Barns and Noble today!