Post # 1
So…..ever since I attended my 1st bridal shower as a child (many years ago) & saw the bride opening up her gifts in front of a crowd of staring women; right then & there, I decided a shower was not for me. I’ve attended many showers since & still feel the same.
It’s the all eyes on me while opening up gifts I find so uncomfortable. Can’t I just put them in a back bedroom and open them up privately with my fiance? Obviously Miss Manners and all her friends think not.
I never thought this would be an issue since I never saw myself in this happy & wonderful place. However….mom & sister in law want to start planning & hosting some sort of gathering. They know my fears & will completely work around whatever I want. They only request is, they host a full size gathering of friends and relatives. I’m not a traditional bride, I have no Maid/Matron of Honor or maids. My awesome brother will be my Man of Honour!
So…what’s an alternative?? I’m an early May 2010 bride & I live in CT. Timing for this would be end Jan/Feb so anything outdoors wouldn’t work in snowy CT. Fancy, casual? I’m fine having men there, although I prefer not to call it a Jack & Jill. Is it too far along to call it an Engagement party? A Cocktail party with our registry included in the invitation or is that tacky?
Suggestions, guidance and your wonderful advice is welcome.
Post # 3
- Wedding: September 2010 - Jewel Box in Forest Park and Windows on Washington
Just call it something like an "Open House." I friend of mine did the same thing and we are planning on doing so too. It will just be a gathering with food, drink and friends. Obviously guests will be gifts, but there will not be any games. It’ll just be friends and family spending time together before the wedding.
Hopefully this helps. You can have it casual or fancy, depending on what fits you both as a couple best.
You can include your registry information on your shower invites….it isn’t tacky, even Emily Post says so!
Post # 4
Hmmmmmm….That is a really good possibility. People here tend to think an Open House has something to do with selling houses. However, with the proper description in the invite, it can make sense. I’m glad to know I’m not the only one out there who doesn’t want to open gifts in front of others.
Any other Bee suggestions?
Post # 5
When my son got married we sent out invites that said "Shawn and Mary are going to make Beautiful Music Together"..we invited couples and singles of both genders. We included registry info and we played music trivia and name that tune. (they were both conservatory majors) The guys had as much fun as the women.
For my daughter we are having a movie themed party/shower. Again, all sexes. They are getting married in a historic theater with a "Red Carpet" theme. So, for the shower/party we are doing all movie food and lots of movie games/trivia. Prizes will be DVD’s.
You can include both genders and take the spotlight off you if you make it fun. (my son and daughter in law waited to open gifts but sent out thank you’s right away)
Post # 6
A good friend of mine who is doing a reading in our wedding and three other girlfriends are having a shower for Fiance and I in a couple of weeks-it is a tailgate themed UGA shower-for guys and girls, single friends too-serving tailgate food, coolers on the deck, a UGA cake (we’re big Georgia fans), pop up UGA awnings in the yard-I’m so excited bc I think it will be a blast-be very different & lots of fun. The printing shop that did the invites told my friend that she thought it was “the neatest idea and you’re going to start a trend”. I threw a cookout for one of my friends (a close colleague) I knew him, but didn’t know her-as a baby shower-and everyone had a great time-guys and girls both invited, some couples and some singles. It was fun & the cookout theme helps everyone feel comfortable.
Post # 7
In the small southern town I’m from brides are given a tea (held on sunday afternoon) or a coffee (held on saturday morning) where ladies attend and socialize while having finger foods and tea or coffee. Gifts are taken by the hostesses and opened to be displayed on tables for guests to look over. A tea is more formal and the coffee option is more casual with brunch served. The nice thing was I didn’t have to open any gifts and people just wandered around and looked over the gifts and chatted with me and other guests.