- 4 years ago
- Wedding: restaurant
So my fiance and I got engaged a few weeks ago, and he is in grad school until 2016, so we were thinking about getting married the Fall of 2016.
Both of our mom’s said that they would give us $2k, and my aunt will chip in $250 for my dress, so right now, we have a total budget of $4,250. All of the money my fiance and I are making over the next 2.5 years is going toward his schooling, or buying a home/moving. Obviously, if I am in love with something and just HAVE to have it, we could dedicate a few hundred dollars more to the budget, but we feel that $4k is reasonable for what is a glorified “party”. (PLEASE don’t get me wrong, I LOVE weddings and would view things totally differently if I had a bigger budget, but I would really like to keep things small, rather than going into major debt for the big day)
I would LOVE some tips on how to pull this off, here is what I really want:
-reception in someone’s backyard
-50ish people (though it will likely be more like 100)
-ceremony before sunset, party until like 11
-buy a second-hand dress
-everyone will dress nicely, but the feel would still be low-key.
-no formal dinner, just fun appetizers that you’d actually want to eat when you’re drunk (pizza bagels, pigs in a blanket, meatballs, mini grilled cheese sandwiches)
-mostly standing and dancing, and a few hightopp tables and chairs for those who need a break/elderly people
-we have family/friends that can get my cake/hair/makeup/officiant for almost free
-I’d like a DJ rather than an iPod playlist (but other than craigslist, I wouldn’t know where to find one for pretty cheap…max budget of like $700)
-Lights strung above us (ideally, it would be in a garden!)
Problems I’ve run into:
-my friend is a photographer… I went to her wedding with my bf (now fiance), is it rude to invite her as the photographer and not invite her husband? (since she will be working the whole time, and we are keeping the guest list extremely small). I painted her a picture for her wedding as her gift (I usually charge around $800 for this), is it rude to ask for a discounted package and have it be her wedding gift to me?
-for those of you who had the reception in someone’s backyard, did you get a tent? My mom is insisting, but I really don’t want to have one if it’s gorgeous out, and I don’t want to blow $1-2k on something I don’t need “just in case”
-We don’t want to get married in a church, where did you have your ceremony?
-I’ve already gotten a lot of people asking when the wedding is (implying that they are expecting an invite) and I think a lot of family members are mad that they may not be invited. Did anyone not invite family members, and how did you navigate any issues it created with other members of your family?
-everyone keeps saying “oh, well why don’t you just put schooling on the backburner, and focus your money on the wedding?” << This question really pisses me off, I’m not going to spend $10k on a wedding so that I can invite every Tom, Dick, and Harry that I’ve ever met
-How did you deal with people who invited you to their wedding, but didn’t make the cut on your guest list?
Wow…lot’s of different subjects on here. I’m just starting to look into things and I’m thinking that I have similar problems to MANY people who want to have something small in someone’s backyard and have to leave certain friends out. Any tips/advice you have on any of this would be greatly appreciated!