Post # 1
i’m the kind of person that HATES not knowing. i like to plan things, and unfortunately my SO refuses to tell me a ‘timeline’. i was doing so well with thinking about other things, but then all of a sudden everyone around me is going to weddings, or getting engaged and it’s gotten harder.
so i was wondering if anyone out there has tips on how to be patient? distract yourself? anything. i feel i may or may not go crazy waiting for this…
Post # 3
Go distract yourself. Take a try of Mr Bee’s 3 Step Plan. 🙂
Post # 4
Ditto! Ditto, ditto, ditto. (for each of the 3 steps 😉
Post # 5
I HATE not being in control. I would especially hate not having a timeline….get busy with other things or else you will drive yourself nuts!!!!!
Post # 6
What has helped me wait for the ring has been –
a) agreeing on a timeline. I think this helped R budget and feel less pressured, and it helped me feel like I had a grasp on how long.
b) talking to other brides. The Bee has been a great help with this. Through the boards on here, I’ve gotten in touch with several brides, brides-to-be and DOCs who have been more than willing to telling me the ins and outs of the venues and vendors I’m looking at. I feel like I’m getting somewhere in planning even though I’m not putting down any deposits.
c) taking breaks from thinking about it/wedding planning. I started working out again, set some fitness goals for myself, and started cooking from scratch 4-5 nights a week instead of about two.
Post # 7
I agree distract and the 3 step plan. I felt like this earlier this month, like I was on the verge of a break down.LOL But then, all of a sudden, I just got over it. Maybe because I’m doing other stuff and being concerned with that.
I will admit I bought a Cricut and thought of how much I can use it for the wedding one day.LOL I bought it because I like to scrapbook though, not just for that.LOL
Post # 8
My biggest suggestion is just to be patient and remember that things will happen in their own time. Honestly it is a lot of fun to plan for a wedding but it can also be very stressful. There are ups and downs to engagement just like there are anything else. Just enjoy the time you have right now. A lot of guys dont do well with pressure so the more you just let things be the better. It can definitely be hard especially when others around you are getting engaged and married, but you just have to remember that what is right for others might not be right for you. It WILL happen one day and it will happen before you know it and then you wont even be able to remember what it was like before!
Post # 9
My suggestion is different from most other Bee’s advice. I vote for sitting yourself down and asking what’s most important to you. Once you figure that out, tell your Boyfriend or Best Friend and explain why. If he loves you and DOES want to marry you (which I’m sure he does) he will respect it. I don’t like how everyone acts like it’s totally up to the guy and we have to sit around and wait. I am a huge proponent for actually having a SAY about when things happen. You don’t have to give him an ultimatum, but making him aware of how you feel is something a lot of girls aren’t able to do. Really. I know other girls will read this and say “I told him, what is Moderndaisy talking about???” No, you didin’t . You hinted and hinted and thought he understood, but chances are he didn’t. And thought you were annoying to boot. You have to actually have the uncomfortable conversation where you tell him when and why you want to get engaged and express your feelings about the possibility of it not happening at a comfortable pace for you.
Post # 10
@moderndaisy – you know, I used to think a lot of girls did that (sat around and waited) and that R and I were the oddballs out for agreeing on the proposal together, but a good number of the waiting girls on here have set pretty detailed timelines with their SO! I’m glad that we’re all forward-thinkers here. 🙂
Post # 11
i think it’s a combination of Mr. Bee’s plan and other bees’ suggestions of getting your priorities in order and being very open and honest with your Boyfriend or Best Friend about them and making sure you are on the same page.