(Closed) Any waiting bees have advice about how not to get your hopes up??

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
3969 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@thearcherandthebull:  A timeline would help you immensely. After a long a heated conversation (not the most fun let me tell you!) we were able to get on the same page. He said (back in December) that it would be by October this year (I had wanted it by August, but we compromised– well, he compromised, I’m sure he wanted to wait longer). So I am not assuming it is happening until October, so when I do see him (we’re LD right now ) I don’t even think about it!

Post # 4
Member
5 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2015

Our 3 year anniversary was a few days ago. I’m getting EXTREMELY antsy. We’re waiting on an inheritance from his grandfather that was supposed to come back in August! Now the lawyer is saying the end of May. I mean, waiting a few months isn’t going to kill me, but I’ve been in love with a ring for like a year now and I want it!

Post # 5
Member
561 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

While I’m not necessarily dying to get engaged right now, there have been a couple of times that I’ve let myself get excited when my boyfriend talks about a special secret gift, or when I’ve come home to see a surprise candlelight dinner set up in the living room. The disappointment sucked, especially since it was taking away from an otherwise wonderful experience. I can only imagine how you feel. The only advice I have is this: talk with him. I was similar to the sister; I told my boyfriend that he had five years to figure out whether he saw himself marrying me, and if he didn’t by then, we should both move on. I got antsy (we moved back to our hometown and people were assuming we were engaged/asking about it, and when we were last visiting his mother she kept introducing me to people as her daughter-in-law), and brought the subject up again a few months ago. Luckily, it is easy for us to talk about it, and through talking to him I’ve found out that he is certain that he wants to marry me, and I’ve got a rough idea as to when he’ll propose. Just knowing that he is thinking about it, and that we are on the same page helped me relax, and to enjoy those special moments for what they are: signs that we are happy and our relationship is growing and thriving.

 

Post # 6
Member
1278 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Everytime my boyfriend plans a surprise or something sweet, I get a little fluttery thinking this may be it. But, it hasnt  been yet!

I think the best thing you can do is never expect it to happen, so that when it does you are surprised.

But also, I know we are on the same path (thanks to many discussions) so I know it is in our future. Having that chat was a big relief.

Post # 7
Member
1157 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I hate waiting too! I think my Boyfriend or Best Friend has a date planned for August, but I can’t be sure. For me, I’m trying to enjoy each trip/occasion without any expectation. It’s not easy, but I know how important it is to my Boyfriend or Best Friend that the proposal be a surprise and at just the right moment. I don’t want to miss out on the experience or just spending time with him. So when I start to feel antsy, I remind myself that I KNOW we are going to get married and that I love him so very much. When the time comes, it will be amazing, perfect and everything I thought it would be. Until then, I don’t want to ruin the moment. But it’s frustrating and it takes a lot of effort. I know I’ll be happier and he will be too if I don’t assume he’s going to propose at every turn.

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