Post # 1
Today my fiancé and I worked on our prenup for a few hours, and it was so much fun! Even though we’ve talked about it a lot before, it was great to sit down and thoroughly discuss our financial expectations together. It was a nice reminder that marriage is a lot more than the pretty dresses and flowers-it’s a serious emotional and legal commitment to another person.
Did anyone else get excited about their prenup?
Post # 3
I’m a lawyer…and I happen to find contracts more interesting than the average person, but I can’t see getting excited about a prenup, a will, etc. They are just tools. I’m glad you were able to use this as a way to broach an open conversation about your finances though.
Post # 4
I didn’t vote. We don’t have one, and I don’t necessarily want one, but if either of us were in a position where it would have made sense, I wouldn’t have argued against it.
Post # 5
We don’t have one…and I don’t think either of us really needs one (financially speaking). But I wouldn’t have been opposed to one if one of us thought it made sense.
Post # 6
We don’t have one but it is still a possibility for us. I think like you said it’s a great way to broach what can often be a difficult topic for couples to discuss and it’s meant to protect you. It’s a great investment.
Post # 7
@kay01: I’m a lawyer too, but I don’t practice family law. Really, what excites me is planning the practical aspects of our life together, not the contract itself.
Of course, it’s also pretty fun to dabble in a different practice area…
Post # 8
My position is that at the end of the day, a marriage is a legal contract. Period. Any other legal contract I would analyze and ensure that all assets are protected. Personally, I think that almost every marriage should have a prenup to determine present and future assets and expenses. For example, I want to ensure that if anything happens, my Fiance isn’t responsible for my student loans and vice versa. You can also stipulate future things such as inheritances. There are certainly other ways from keeping assets legally separate (contrary to popular belief, things aren’t always automatically joint property when acquired while together), but in my mind it’s just a responsible legal document to have in the same way that a living will or a will is a responsible document to have. I think the key is to take the emotion out of it.
This thread reminds me that I haven’t gotten to that yet!
Post # 9
We don’t have one and we don’t need one. In Oklahoma, in the situation of a divorce, you can only take what you brought into the relationship. So, he’d always get his things and I’d always get my things.
I’d have no desire to take money or things from him in the event of a divorce. Just too much hassle.
Post # 10
I def think talking about your future plans and finances is exciting but I don’t know if the actual prenup contract is…
Post # 11
I’m not excited about drawing one up, but I know it’s necessary for financial reasons (re: inheritance). However, my BF is not too keen on the idea. But it’s either have a pre-nup or forfeit my inheritance.
Post # 12
we don’t have one, but if it had been appropriate to have one, I wouldn’t have a problem with it. I wouldn’t be excited about it though, that’s just weird to me.
Post # 13
It kinda sounds like you are forcing yourself to act excited to cover up the fact that you’re really not. That’s all I can come up with as to why you’d say you’re excited. I couldn’t stand the idea of a prenup – I saw it as planning my divorce.
Post # 14
I’m glad we have one, because I brought more money into the relationship at the start, but he’s bringing more potential, and we’ve already dabbled a bit in small businesses. Of course we’re not planning for divorce, but with a pretty complicated financial picture, it’s nice to know that we won’t feud over money, should things not work out. Divorce and money bring out the worst in people.
Post # 15
@oneofthesethings: I was genuinely excited about our prenup. I saw it as planning my marriage, not planning my divorce.
Statistically, you are less likely to get a divorce if you have a prenup.
Post # 16
We don’t have one because we have no assets, so I sort of wish that we had one because it would mean we had enough to worry about! We have an informal one for our hypothetical future money, but our grad student selves don’t need it.