(Closed) Anyone else experience major worry or regrets after they picked their ring?!

posted 5 years ago in Rings
Post # 16
351 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

I was worried at first too! But it is a big purchase, so the anxiety is understandable. After everything was said and done though, I worried for nothing because I love my ring and you will love yours too! 

Post # 17
282 posts
Helper bee

Yes! I had my top two, he ended up choosing THE ONE. I was nervous that I made a mistake one having him decide the final one BUT I believe it’s because it is such a big decision. It is something you will wear for the rest of your life and then there is the “what if’s”… what if a new one comes along that I love even more!?

We are now married, as of Jan, I have 2 wedding bands ((the 2nd was a surprise at the ceremony ring exchange)) that look amazing with my Ering and I LOVE them all πŸ™‚ 

Post # 18
1488 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - Cape May

The anxiety and worry over choosing the right ring is totally normal, especially when we feel this insane need to get the perfect ring. I freaked out so much that he proposed earlier than intended and brought me with him to pick up the ring when it was ready. Fast forward 5 years later and I love my ering. Sure there are tweaks and changes I’d to to customize it. Picking out a ring and then having it was a journey of emotions and completely normal.

Post # 19
58 posts
Worker bee

Totally, totally normal! It’s a huge decision, and I know my fiancé and I were both nervous about it when we picked it. He even told me after he got it that he was worried it wasn’t good enough in some way. But we both love it. Mostly I wonder if other people would change aspects of it, but that’s not what matters. It’s perfect for me. If I truly didn’t like something or felt it didn’t suit me we could change it. 

Post # 22
58 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

View original reply
lesliewalcott:  Yes, I just went through this. We ordered the ring, she put in the custom order and I immeditely regreted it. We also picked it out together, I chose the setting, he chose the diamond. The halo would be too big, it would look gaudy and too big on my small hands, 1ct is too much, it was too expensive, ect.. I was convinced I was going to replace it as soon as it came in for a daintier halo. I actually talked to the jeweler about it and she assured me that returns of E-rings happen more often than most people think and if I wasn’t satisfied that she would handle it.. My Fiance was a little disappointed that I was already set to trade it out, but he wanted me to be happy so he agreed.


Well it just came in on Wednesday and he proposed on Thursday and I LOVE the ring. I should have trusted my gut, there is a reason I picked it out in the first place. I hope yours has a happy ending as well, but if not, trade it in and find a ring you absolutely love. There is nothing like having the perfect ring. 

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 5 months ago by melanie0517.
Post # 23
258 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

View original reply
lesliewalcott:  Yes! My 1 carat looks so much bigger in photos!! In person, it just looks like a regular size stone. When I got engaged everyone on FB wanted to see the ring, and I was shy about posting it at all because I didn’t want to be ostentatious about it. I actually went through the pictures and chose the one I thought it looked smallest in, lol! Unless your finger is tiny (I’m a 5.5 with long skinny fingers) then it probably won’t look big at all.

Go with your gut on the F1 and you won’t regret it. We compared my F1 to my mom’s 1 carat diamond, side by side, and they were identical looking to us. My mom was blown away (in a positive way) by this. I love that I can have the look I want and not feel guilty (ethically or money-wise) wearing it.

Post # 24
17 posts

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lesliewalcott:  Going through this right now! We originally were offered a family stone (marquise) and I initially was very hesitant, because I never thought I liked marquise-shaped diamonds. However, I knew it would be rude to not accept such a generous gift and started to look for settings here and there that I might like. I actually ended up finding a setting both my boyfriend and I really loved and we were very happy with where we were going. Then…he found out his grandmother sold her stone…after offering it to us in a very moving way a couple of years ago, without letting us know. It’s 100% her perogative to do whatever she wants with her possessions and my boyfriend and I would’ve been totally okay with it if she let us know, but he was sort of blindsided when we asked for the stone and she said she sold it…

So, then he says to me “well, now you can pick anything you want!”. I suddenly felt sort of overwhelmed with having to start the whole process again, and I really did love the setting we found so I decided “screw it, I still want a marquise” which I swear I still can’t believe I’m saying. But the setting is beautiful and unique and so many rings I see look so similar. I love the idea of having something different, but there is so much negativity around marquise diamonds that I have 100% been second guessing my decision! I know I love the ring I picked out, but I can’t help but question! I’m telling myself it’s normal and no matter what, I end up with my boyfriend becoming my fiance and that is the real point <3 

Post # 25
201 posts
Helper bee

I know exactly how you feel. I designed my ring myself and literally picked every detail about it. It is exactly what I wanted. When it arrived, I felt underwhelmed…  It’s beautiful and again exactly what I want but I kept thinking maybe I should have gotten another setting. My SO told me to stop looking. Lol.

He has since taken the ring and put it in the safety deposit box until he proposes. I have a feeling once I get it on my finger all the second guessing will go away. Well I hope so anyway!

Post # 26
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016


I picked out about 4 rings and then let him choose the one he liked most.  And when I say I picked 4, I mean that I AGONIZED over the decision for hours and days and weeks.  When he accidentally told me he ordered one, I was so excited…but then nervous.  Then one day, I opened his phone (I was using it to make a phone call), and I saw the ring he had picked (he must have been checking on it).  My heart dropped and I was honestly a bit upset, even though I had included it in the list of rings I LOVED.


Almost a week later, when he proposed, he opened the box, and though I saw pictures of this thing…in person, with my love on one knee holding it up to me, I could hardly breathe.  

I think you’ll love your ring…because when the moment comes, you can’t not love the gift from the love of your life πŸ™‚

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 5 months ago by cjkostuch.
Post # 27
199 posts
Blushing bee

I just today mailed my grandmother’s heirloom stone to James Allen and I’m immediately questioning all of my choices. πŸ™‚

Since I had an immediate gut reaction of “that’s it” when I saw the setting, the obvious solution is to stop staring at it and just trust it will be okay.

Like you I’m worried about size. I was planning on a .5ct moissanite prior to my mother offering grandma’s ring… Which is a very different story. I can only remind myself that this is not a bad problem to have. 

Let’s just eat chocolate and do some yoga and try to zen out about it!

Post # 28
53 posts
Worker bee

Yes!!! Fiance and I placed the order together, and for the next 3 weeks while the ring was being made and shipped, I found a new thing to obsess over everyday! I went with a smaller stone with better quality, and was SO worried it would look small.

I then began to worry if the ring would be too tight, that I would have finger muffin-top, and I actually went back to the store and tried to change to a bigger size, before recieving it! They told me it was too late as it was already on its way. They said to just try it on first. 

Needless to say, all the stress and anxiety was for nothing. I fell in love the minute I saw it; it fits perfectly and looks amazing on my finger. 

My friends thought I was going insane, and would have none of the obsessive drama. I am the first to be engaged from my group, and while my friends are happy for me, they dont truly know how it feels. Its hard to find someone who knows just how important every little thing is. Thats when i turned to the Bee! Here, we know how you feel. I would say try not to worry. Once you have it, you will know it’s the one. There is a connection. You will love it. And congrats Bee!

Post # 29
124 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Tennessee

Yes, I had a worry that .75 wouldn’t look how I was wanting, and maybe I should’ve gone with a 1ct (moissy). When I brought it up to him that maybe I’d like to see what a 1 ct looked like on my finger, it was clear he’d already made the purchase, so I backed off, but I still kinda worried that I’d wish for a bigger stone. Once it was on my hand, it became the perfect ring, and all my worries vanished.. =)


Post # 30
73 posts
Worker bee

Oh my gosh, this is me right now.  The order was put in a few weeks ago, and I’m starting to panic that maybe I won’t like it. My boyfriend let me pick, so I’m so scared that it will be ugly and it will be my fault.

I always thought I wanted rose gold. I looove rose gold and the warmer color compliments my skin (at least I think so). But now I’m panicking that rose gold is too trendy, and I should have gotten a more timeless white gold or platinum.  And then I got a dainty halo with an oval stone – something I didn’t even know existed (I didn’t look at erings until recently haha), and I was immediately smitten with the style.  But now I’m afraid my center stone (1c) plus the halo will look way too big/gaudy. Also, will I regret not getting a more traditional cut, like a round or a princess cut? Or the more traditional solitaire? Also.. it has a pave band, which looks absolutely **gorgeous**, but I’m starting to panic that what if it is too sparkly??

I am driving myself crazy, clearly. lol πŸ˜›

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