(Closed) Anyone else experience this during planning?

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: So... does it happen to you?
    ALL the time! : (8 votes)
    17 %
    Once or twice. : (14 votes)
    30 %
    No, but I know it happens to other people. : (21 votes)
    45 %
    Nope, I think you're alone there! : (4 votes)
    9 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    6124 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @Rachel631:  YES!!! and after being in this situation, I would suggest starting/ending the conversation like this:

     

    Bride: Well, for that aspect of my wedding, it’s still in the works or we’re not sure yet.  Hey, hows that new job of yours?

    Instead of

    Bride: Well, for that aspect of my wedding, I wanted to do A, but person X said that I should do B instead because [insert reason].


    Just make it all a surprise to everyone!  I know it’s very hard not to share.  BTDT.

    Post # 5
    Member
    3825 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    and this is why i don’t talk to people about my wedding. well, i only talk to my matron of honor and my mom. they know they will be at the wedding sooo… and even still, my mom tells me “i don’t like that.” and i have to politely say “well i’m going with it, but thank you for your opinion”

    Post # 6
    Member
    6015 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I’m the only sister of 5 kids, I think i’m just bossy and no one really questions my choices.  They are used to just listening to me and going along with my wants.  My sil questioned why we weren’t getting married in church, and once i explained the obstacles and the time constraints there were no more questions about it.

    Post # 7
    Member
    6124 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @Rachel631:  You’d figure at least SOME of those opinionaters have been married before, and wouldn’t you think they would HATE if someone did to them what they are doing to you?  I don’t get it. If it worked for you guys great, but doesn’t mean it’s for everyone!

    Post # 8
    Member
    101 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    hahah those kind of demands just make me laugh.

    I’d tell the people who make them that they are free to make those choices at their own weddings and to leave it at that.

    Post # 9
    Member
    7652 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I think in that case its just best not to talk wedding with people. People will always have opinions, and they are just that. Nothing you have to take into consideration if you don’t want to. It is you and your FI’s day, and whatever you want you get. Guests don’t have to come if they don’t like your decisions.

    Post # 10
    Member
    2902 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    Why are you still sharing details with people? 

    I don’t tell anyone what I’m doing, I just say we are still in the process of planning so don’t have any details at this stage. 

    Post # 12
    Member
    1841 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    The details of my wedding are between me and Fiance.  Maid/Matron of Honor knows, but is BFF enough to only offer her support of whatever Fiance and I want.  Of course, I’ve reached a point in my life that I don’t really GAF what anybody thinks. 🙂

    Post # 13
    Member
    8424 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2012

    Yes yes and yes….my wedding has come and gone but I too ran into stuff like that as well. It seems like when people hear the word wedding that they want to put in their 2 cents (which they always think is right) even when you didn’t ask for it! After a while I just started avoiding wedding discussions around certain people!

    Post # 14
    Member
    2902 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    @Rachel631:  lol love being compared to Yoda!! To be honest I live in another country from all my friends and family so it’s much easier to bullshit over the phone than it is to do face to face 😉

    Post # 16
    Member
    198 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    I’ve stop telling people details of the wedding because of that very reason. Everyone has an opinion and everyone wants to add their two cents. Forget it; keep details to yourself and when asked say “If it’s ok with you I’d like to leave the details as a surprise for everyone”.

    When we first began planning we received such negativity from certain people that we just decided to keep most things to ourselves. Now we just plan and have peace.

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