(Closed) Anyone else experience this during planning?

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: So... does it happen to you?
    ALL the time! : (8 votes)
    17 %
    Once or twice. : (14 votes)
    30 %
    No, but I know it happens to other people. : (21 votes)
    45 %
    Nope, I think you're alone there! : (4 votes)
    9 %
  • Post # 17
    4690 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY

    YES! I get this all the time hahaha, you hit the nail on the head! So annoying.

    Lesson I learned early on: TELL NO ONE ANYTHING!!!

    My favorite phrase when people ask about details… “Oh, we haven’t decided on that yet.”

    Post # 18
    188 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: February 2016

    The only reason I don’t get that version of this trope is because I try very hard to avoid talking about people to other people. In all things, I mean, but especially wedding. I’m not being nice. I just don’t need their mutual bullsh*t.

    Post # 19
    8575 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    My mom has made soooo many comments about things I wanted.

    Like the colors. Black. Ivory. With hints of hot pink/fuschia. She doesn’t like the black. Okay well, good for you, lady!

    She didn’t like the bouquets I picked out. Calla lillies/roses. She likes carnations. Not my problem!

    I wanted to do cute and funky socks [for the younger guests], with a tag that says, “Love is like a pair of socks. You gotta have 2, and they’ve gotta match!”. She didn’t like that idea. Couple months later she admitted that she turned it down, not because it was bad, but because it was really cute and she was jealous of my creativity. Wow.

    I just stopped talking to her about things. She doesn’t really support anything I want to do.. nor is she paying for it, so she has no say.

    Post # 20
    161 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Lawl, hypocrites anon.

    Aw… don’t listen to X. You’re the bride, and you should do whatever you want. It’s your wedding, right?

    “Aw, thanks guest… I’m the bride and D really makes me happy, although it seems to super horrify you. I’m glad you had the presence of mind to agree with my wedding earlier enough for that to not be an issue.” *super sweet smile*

    Post # 21
    258 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I’ve always found myself trying to defend what we’re doing and how we’re doing it, but lately I haven’t given a crap as to what anyone else thinks. Partly because it’s getting closer and I haven’t got the time or patience to change anything, and partly because it’s OUR day and we will do it how WE want to.

    For example (on discussing the reception at our destination wedding):

    Future Mother-In-Law – What are we doing for the reception?

    ME – We’re not having a proper reception. We just want to make a group booking at a restaurant and keep it low-key. We can have a backyard reception when we get back home.

    Future Mother-In-Law – So you’re not having a reception in Rarotonga?

    ME – No. We can have a backyard reception when we get back home.

    Future Mother-In-Law – Why?

    ME – Not many people. Not worth it. Keeping it low-key.

    Future Mother-In-Law – So, no reception in Rarotonga?

    ME – No. We just want to make a group booking at a restaurant and keep it low-key

    Future Mother-In-Law – Oh, okay *Rolls eyes*

    …Listen, lady!!



    Post # 23
    311 posts
    Helper bee

    Ugh, I think all brides face this! And sometimes from those you least expect it from.


    As mentioned by many others, I initially was happy to discuss all my cool ideas and research with all friends and family.  Until we started getting resistance and people thinking we were opening the floor to debate some of our decisions. To top if off my Future Sister-In-Law got an engagement ring very similar to mine and it was done.

    Now I like to use the “our planner is deciding that, but I’ll let her know” or just smiling and nodding.  I’ve only had to pull the “NO” out a few times.

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