Post # 1
With a month to go my family keeps trying to change things on me and with the anxiety i’m so worried my wedding is going to be a mess because people keep changing things on me especially my mother. I’m seriously freaking out and panicking that afterwards I’m oging to hate my pictures because of my ideas clashing with those of my mother’s and just getting very emotional…
Doesn’t help that whenever she beings something up I get overly emotional and overwhelmed that I just can’t say no because I don’t want to have to put forth the effort to defend and explain myself and argue….
Everything just seems like it’s spinning out of control…
Post # 3
You’re not alone. I’m right there with you! Our wedding is less than 3 weeks away and I have a lot to get done and no idea how I am going to pull it off. 🙁
Post # 4
Yay I’m glad someone understands not yay you’re feeling this too!
Post # 5
Do you have an assertive but diplomatic frined/bridemaid/relative that can help you? You could discuss all the things you want with them, and then they could be with you in a “meeting” with your mom, so they can defend your position/state your view for you when you get overwhelmed. But it would have to be someone who will be calm and not start get into a fight with your mom.
Regardless of that, maybe you should just tell your mom that you are feeling very overwhelmes and like the wedding is out of control. YOu could tell her at a time when you aren’t trying to plan any part of the wedding. Maybe she doesn’t realize how much this is stressing you out. Maybe you could just tell her what you need, like “All these changes are really overwhelming me, and I really need for everyone to stick with the plan we made to do [blank] so that I feel like things are under control and I can look forward to the wedding.” You could say it everytime your family tries to change something. Your “take the power back” mantra.
Post # 6
Tell your family it’s your wedding and there’s not enough time to change things and how much it’s stressing you out. Remeber, this is YOUR wedding and it should be how YOU want it to be! Everything will work out!
I’m kind of freaking out too, mostly because I’m afraid I’m forgetting something. I’ve made list after list but I still feel like there’s something, something very big that I’m forgetting!
Post # 7
I think that would drive me crazy too.
I can’t say I can relate. Since I am the one paying and planning my wedding, no one really has a say. I get ideas from my sister and mom but it’s usually because I ask their opinion and what they think and I trust them, They are all about being helpful to me, not stressing me out.
Post # 8
Yup!!! I hear you and you are not alone… I have decided I will no longer engage in disagreements and have pointed those people in the direction of my sister. thank goodness she knows how to put people in thier place in a nice way because I am getting to the point of saying.. you know what don’t bother coming.. you can step down.. go away.. get away from me.. really it’s my wedding not yours!!! GRRRR .. wishing I had kept it simple… really.
Who knew it was going to be like this?
Post # 9
@nativedesires: I’m so glad you have someone you can point people too. Unfortunatly I don’t really have someone like that, but I’ve learned that under a month until the wedding I need to put my foot down and say “what’s done is done!”
Post # 10
Yes. FI’s family is getting out of control and currently writing cheques that nobody can cash when it comes to the wedding. I am going to have to reign it in pretty soon when we actually start booking things.