Post # 1
I need to vent to those who I think will understand 🙂
I am in week 9 (due the end of September) hubby and myself decided to keep it to ourselves until at least 12 wks – which it becoming very difficult.
We live out of town from most of our close friends and family, so avoiding them as been pretty easy. But it’s co-workers that I am having a problem with!
I have had a few appts in the past couple of wks to confirm the pregnancy, and my first ultrasounds 2 wks ago, so with taking time off work for those appts, I also took a sick day a few weeks ago. Anyways, in the midst of all the time off I have had co-workers out right are asking if I am pregnant. It’s really starting to drive me a bit insane, and I just want to almost yell right at them for asking me such a thing.
I can’t imagine ever asking a girl that as I have had friends in the past with problems during pregnancy, I think it’s such a personal thing, I just can’t believe people (especially women) would ask me right out the way they do. I usually just brush it off when they ask, and try to laugh at it, but it just got to me today again when I got asked a third time when I left for another appt.
Anyways, thanks for reading – just need to vent!
Post # 3
I’m sorry your coworkers are so insensitive. That must be hard to deal with.
I had to tell my boss early on because I needed a couple of days off for appointments, but I managed to not tell the rest of my coworkers until around 12 – 13 weeks. I’m not sure what I would have said if someone outright asked me if I was pregnant! I’m a terrible liar.
You only have a few more weeks to go and then you can make your announcement!
Post # 4
I do! Darling Husband and I are dying to spill but we’ve only told two people because of vacation plans we originally were working on but now is no longer a possibility (assuming this baby sticks!).
I’m sorry that your co-workers are so insensitive. Really, they shouldn’t be asking you that type of thing as I’m sure it’s a violation of an HR policy somewhere. Further, plenty of people at my work take time off for doctor’s appointments, dentist’s appointments and optometrist’s appointments, so having that much time off isn’t abnormal.
If you wanted to throw them off, maybe next time they ask, you can say, “OMG YES I AM!” and when they squeal and go “OMG Really???” you can say, “Ummm. NO. Just messin’ with you. Did it work?” I’m pretty sure if I did that with my coworkers they would stop asking – forever.
Post # 5
@clinique: I’m just about as far along as you are. 9w4d. When my husband and I had JUST found out, we were out of state visiting my inlaws. My brother-in-law’s girlfriend asked me straight to my face if I was pregnant, with really no reason to. I shook my head and she asked if it was wrong for her to ask and I said, yes, it is. So later on that day she proceeded to ask my husband the same thing. I know they are just excited, but it’s annoying. I hated having to lie about being pregnant too.
At this point, our parents know about the baby and our siblings. We told our parents around 5-6 weeks and our siblings we sent Valentine’s Day cards to telling them the news. No one else knows yet (except the Bee) and it’s been really hard. I’m unemployed, so coworkers isn’t an issue for me, but my husband is probably getting anxious. He works with a woman who is having infertility issues so he talks to her a lot and she knows we were trying too. Besides that, it’s been awhile since I’ve seen any of my close friends. Just a dry spell from seeing them, so it hasn’t been an issue to keep it from them. We have plans to see all of them in a couple weeks and plan to share the news. I’ll be almost 12 weeks by then.
Post # 6
Yep, it totally sucks not being able to tell people, but turns out if you tell your BIG MOUTH in-laws, they will just go and spread the news for you! Grrrrr!!! We specifically told them not to tell people and they completely disregarded it and have been telling most of their friends/family. I am a little pissed because you wait until 2nd trimester for a reason, and the reason is in case anything goes wrong I would not want a gajillion people asking me about a miscarriage. Guess the in-laws didn’t get that. We are probably going to “announce” next week after my appointment if everything goes well, I will almost be 12 weeks by then and enough people know now that I guess it doesn’t even really matter how long we wait.
Post # 7
Thanks ladies – happy to hear I’m not alone in this. With common knowledge about the time sensitivity I just wish people had more respect about the topic and let us talk about it whenever we are comfortable and not push it.
Post # 8
@cowgirlace: I can’t imagine!! Wow I feel for you having your inlaws tell others before you – what a disappointment.
Post # 9
It’s hard, and honestly I’m kicking myself for telling so many people. First it was my bff. Then his. Then my sister. Then my other bff. Then 4 friends that I spent the long holiday weekend with bc I couldn’t hide it. Then my parents. Then his parents.
And I’m only 8 weeks! I need to zip it and hold off for another 4 weeks, but I just know I”m going to end up telling 2 more of my closest friends this weekend… blabbermouth.
Post # 10
It’s been really difficult for me to keep my mouth shut. I’m usually an open book, and before I got pregnant, I swore that I wouldn’t keep it a secret for 12 weeks, but now that I am, I just feel so protective of my little one, and I don’t feel comfortable putting that kind of business out there just yet.
We’ve only told my parents and my DH’s parents. Not even our siblings, who we’re extremely close with. We decided this because information becomes an avalanche. Once one person knows, they only have to tell one other person for the whole thing to begin rolling down hill.
However, we went on vacation last week and met a few nice couples, and they noticed I wasn’t drinking, so I told them the news. I figured I’d never see them again and they don’t know anyone in my real life, so what’s the harm. It was fun to be able to tell people and be open about it!!
Post # 11
We’re telling people in stages (told the parents at 4 weeks, will tell best friends around 8 weeks, won’t make it public until 12) and it’s been really nice to have a few people in the know. It’s still hard because I’m so impatient to tell everyone, but at least I can call my mom when I want to talk.
Sorry your coworkers were so douchey. I can’t believe how rude some people are.