(Closed) Anyone else have a terrible MIL?

posted 8 years ago in Family
  • poll: Do you like your MIL?

    I love her to pieces!

    No, but I try my best for my FI sake.

    Somewhere in the middle.

  • Post # 17
    Member
    1 posts
    Wannabee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    Hi..I just joined this cause I can’t handle my Future Mother-In-Law. I am getting married in May and she wants to dictate everything right down to how my ring should look like. She has never liked me and has finally conceeded with her son’s choice. I feel like she’s really pushing me to my limits and I am afraid that I will explode. I love Him but I don’t know if I can handle the you marry into the family. If she’s like this now, what will she be like after..or when we have kids? Why can’t she just let things be? I envy my cousin cause she has the most laid back in-laws.

    Post # 18
    Member
    1157 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I don’t really care for my Future Mother-In-Law.I am cordial when I see her,but I don’t go out of my way to form a relationship anymore.his mom and sister are jealous of our relationship.big time!

    Post # 19
    Member
    420 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    Technically I suppose I do, but I’ve never met her. DH hates her and hasn’t been in contact with her for years. His only other sibling (BIL) cut ties with their mom about a year ago, and moved in with us on and off. she’s crazy as all get out! I’m very glad I’ve never met her, lol. Hopefully I never will!

    Post # 20
    Member
    7426 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2013

    Fiance doesn’t talk to his mom, so neither do I, obviously. I’ve never met her.

    Post # 21
    Member
    261 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I think the relationship MIL-DIL will always be a delicate and difficult one. There’s so much written about it on the web, books, magazines and even movies. All this literature on the subject shows how hot the topic is for many married and almost married women all around the world. I also think that the less self-confident and open-minded a woman is, the higher the risk of being an intrusive and jealous Mother-In-Law. In the case of my Mother-In-Law, she didn’t have the opportunity to study and open up her mind, for example, and I guess this is why she’s two-faced, sneaky and jealous. The fact is that the way a Mother-In-Law feels towards a DIL, is probably going to influence the other members of her family: Father-In-Law and, most of all, sisters in law. In the beginning I used to get upset about it, but now I decided to be smart and don’t pay attention to her, she’s the one in the weak position. I’ll be nice whatever the situation is.

    Post # 22
    Member
    1926 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply
    @Tibbs  Jeez, I feel like there needs to be a backstory with this post!

    Post # 23
    Member
    2965 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I have the WORST Mother-In-Law IN THE WORLD. I kid you not. She is a registered sex offender (and we have 3 children), she is NOTHING but a liar and a manipulator (she has tried to lie and manipulate Fiance and break up our relationship). Thank god she doesn’t come around or call as much. She’s already been called out on her mistakes. The only times we are FORCED to see her is for Christmas and the other kids’ (FI’s nieces and nephew) b-days by the way, I am no longer attending.

    Post # 24
    Member
    594 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    @javamonkey  oh man, I feel you on that. 

    Step Mother-In-Law is kind of a walking controlling opinionated insecure woman – her marriage is miserable and she is constantly complaining of how “bored” she is… that makes a person miserable to be around. ;p 

    I really think (new) family members teach us about ourselves (handling a difficult person, patience etc etc) and on how, not to be. 

    I have learned to be open communicative with Fiance, not to bitch about him to others family members, and to resolve problems/disagreements ASAP rather than let them fester for years. I may also add, it is important to have an ongoing conversation about retirement and expectations about children from one another. ;p 

     

    Post # 25
    Member
    594 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    View original reply
    @sasi  WORD ! I cannot agree with you more. 

    My Step Mother-In-Law, has deeper issues that come up. It is sad that they come up because of my relationship with her step son but I have also learned to just ignore and move on ;p 

    Post # 26
    Member
    3038 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Oh my… if I was to marry my FI’s family (and with that I only mean his mum, his dad is a sweet heart) it would not last part the I DO’S. I don’t like her and she doesn’t like me – we both know it and she also pretty much wrote me a novel telling me so. Fortunately, I don’t care what she thinks about me as long as Fiance understands why I feel the way I do, which he does. Question remains though… will she attend the wedding – not sure at this point!

    Post # 27
    Member
    2104 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I don’t like the way my in-laws treat my husband and me. My in-laws (mainly MIL) don’t like how I’ve affected my husband. Tough noogies, we’re married. 

    I did not marry my husband’s family. However, my parents love my husband and treat him like gold. 

    Post # 28
    Member
    535 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    We haven’t seen his mother outside of a courtroom in almost a year. Unless aliens abduct her and leave a human being in her place,  I don’t think he’ll change his mind about inviting her to the wedding. 

    Post # 29
    Member
    12244 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2013

    She’s… something. She’s great 99% of the time, but the other 1%? UGH. Just UGH. She actually told us we should skip FSIL’s wedding because “we probably had something better to do”. She also told us there was “no WAY” that we were going to be able to get married in FI’s childhood church (we are getting married there, by the way).

    She pulls stuff out of the air and says it until Fiance and Future Father-In-Law believe her (so, twice?)

    On the other hand, she was the only person who EVER gave Fiance comfort or confidence growing up. Future Father-In-Law is a verbally abusive MONSTER, and Future Mother-In-Law was the one who picked up the pieces after all the verbal tear-downs.

    So I owe her a LOT for that. But… She can still be… something.

    Post # 30
    Member
    338 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    View original reply
    @musician32992  I’ve been with Fiance for four years, I have in those four years accumulated enough stories about my Future Mother-In-Law to dine out on for the rest of my life. She’s the most manipulative person I’ve ever met – only she’s not very good at it. The results of her attempted manipulations are often both comical and tragic.

    I’ll not go into details in an open forum, but I will say this: A few months ago my Fiance and I were talking about what would happen if some accident (God forbid!) was to befall one of us. He asked that I’d help his mum financially, should anything happen to him (he is all she has left). I told him that the only place I’d help his mum was over a high cliff into the crashing waters below. Such has her behaviour been towards me, that instead of being angry at me, he just decided to take out a life insurance policy with her as beneficiary, so I wouldn’t have to deal with her.  

    Post # 31
    Member
    89 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    inlaws are always difficult.  luckily my FH is scottish, so his fam lives abroad. Family in small doses is always much more tolerable 🙂

    The topic ‘Anyone else have a terrible MIL?’ is closed to new replies.

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