(Closed) Anyone else have a terrible MIL?

posted 8 years ago in Family
  • poll: Do you like your MIL?

    I love her to pieces!

    No, but I try my best for my FI sake.

    Somewhere in the middle.

  • Post # 47
    Member
    831 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: Either Philadelphia City Hall or a small chapel.

    She can be helpful and supportive of us, but, then at other times is just a bitch.

     

     

    Post # 48
    Member
    1102 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: City, State

    I try. But she’s not my favorite.

    Post # 49
    Member
    831 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: Either Philadelphia City Hall or a small chapel.

    He’s away right now and she was snappin saying she regretted her family, putting him down (she was originally blaming me for him going to jail), and in general I’ve come to find her & her husband prefer his half sister over FH.

    Like, how are you gonna hope I’m sterile or birth control because you don’t want your son to have kids that will be like him?

    Your fuckin daughter is 24 and lives rent-free; you pay for everything for her. Her 35 year old ex was there too until they broke up. Is that fair at all?

    Post # 50
    Member
    2093 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    I answered somewhere in the middle. I REALLY like my future Mother-In-Law & Father-In-Law. It’s my future step Mother-In-Law I’m apprehensive about…she’s mean. 

    Post # 51
    Member
    25 posts
    Newbee

    View original reply
    @JessPoz:  HOLY CRAP! This is exactly my situation.  My Future Mother-In-Law has been absolutely amazing the past 4 years.  I moved to a new city closer to them and she has done so much to make me feel welcome and comfortable in a new city.  Now that we are engaged I think she has literally lost her mind!

    A – I told her that we wanted a SMALL intimate wedding with 100 people MAX.  She gives me a list of about 70 people and still complained about how many people she couldn’t invite.  That this 70 was her absolute MUST HAVES and there is “no cutting anyone” from this list.  That is 70% of my guest list.  It’s like she didn’t even consider my family.  My fiance and I cut a bunch of plus 1 she added to get it down to 58.  

    B – She pressured me the first week we were engaged asking me who will be in my wedding party.  I felt really pressured to include Future Sister-In-Law (whom I do not get along with or like). I made the mistake of saying “of course she will be a Bridesmaid or Best Man..I don’t have a choice” while laughing to make light of it but now I regret it SO much.  I still haven’t asked Future Sister-In-Law to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man and Future Mother-In-Law is like freaking out (behind my back lol).  She DEF told her daughter that she was going to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man.  

    C – She is trying to now force a relationship between me and Future Sister-In-Law which is seriously pissing me off. I can’t even get into it bc it is just so much. 

    D – I invited her to go venue searching with me (my mom lives out of state) which I did not have to do and now she’s pissed bc the venue we picked is the only venue I didn’t take her to. She keep making all these backhanded comments about how she “has no idea what’s going on with the wedding” even though I legit tell her every detail. I invited her to come see the venue one weekend to hopefully shut her up and she called me to make those arrangements of course causing a big deal over the Future Sister-In-Law coming (long story).  While talking she starts OUT OF NOWHERE freaking out saying “I dont even know whats going on? Have you been meeting with photographers? Videographers? Did you find a band yet? Are you going to use my florist?” I was like WHOA THERE CHILL.OUT. I politely told her yes I’m looking for bands/photographers.  She’s all over me with “you should use x band, x photographer, my florist in my town, get your dress altered at my seamstress.” I asked her if everything was ok bc she was getting so hyped up and she started crying. I was so confused and she basically hung up on me. Apparently she was having a bad day but that resulted in me telling my Fiance he needed to tell her to take a chill pill and calm down. Not to call ME crazy like that over the wedding.  

    OY! Thanks for letting me vent!

    Post # 52
    Member
    2203 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    View original reply
    @bostonbridebee123:  Omg, this sounds like my experience exactly! Especially A. Ugh. I’m really trying to get along with her, but it’s a daily challenge. 

    Post # 53
    Member
    62 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I can relate.. my Mother-In-Law is terrible.. well most of his family is.. I cant vote cause we just decided it be best to keep our distance…. sometimes its best to avoid conflict and be abe to live your life! 

    Post # 54
    Member
    25 posts
    Newbee

    View original reply
    @sleepyhead22:  It really is such a challenge! I don’t get it.  She was so sweet, caring and awesome before we got engaged and now sh’es a maniac.  I talked to some older girls at work who have “been there” and they said that MOG’s are just freaked out about “lossing their sons.” Didn’t know that gave them the right to act like emotional monsters LOL.  I’m so glad I found these boards bc I’m just reading through commenting and feeling better already- We are not alone!!

    Post # 55
    Member
    62 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    View original reply
    @bostonbridebee123:  Godzillas in laws! they do get all frantic of loosing their son… when we had a family cookout to get to know each other my mother ( she loves my hubby) told my Mother-In-Law that she didnt feel as if she was loosing a daughter but that she was gaining a son….. my Mother-In-Law went CRICKET CRICKET!!!….  BUT you know the saying… a daughter is a daughter all her life… and a son is a son til he takes a wife.. =0

     

    let me just add i dont take it personally cause she has 3 sons and 2 daughters and she has something to say about each son or daughter in law… till they break.. reason why we are stayin far far…

    Post # 56
    Member
    22 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    My Mother-In-Law has good intensions, but sometimes she’s just too much. She wants to be SO involved in the wedding, she acts like she’s my Maid/Matron of Honor sometimes or that she even wants to be the bride again!! But things have gotten better ever since I started planning my NYC wedding over Choisr.com, I added her to all my planning decisions along with my family and bridesmaids, and now she can give me all the advice she wants just but answering my Choisrs and giving me her feedback online!! Now she only calls twice a day instead of 6 times a day 😉 Got to love getting a new family 🙂

    Post # 57
    Member
    312 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    My shower was this past weekend, it was the most amazing shower I could have asked for, my mom bridesmaids and Future Mother-In-Law hosted it, however my Future Mother-In-Law was not even there!! She was on vacation and missed her flight back.  Lovely right. I have no words,

    Post # 58
    Member
    3173 posts
    Sugar bee

    My Future Mother-In-Law is great. My mother is going to make a terrible, evil, and absolutely awful mother in law someday. My little brother is currently dating a Stanford graduate and she is not good enough says my mother. He is currently not speaking to her. She also told me that she will never be happy for me and is choosing not to come to my wedding.

    Edit: Actually, I forgot she is a mother in law already. My sister has been married so long that I don’t even think about him. She tolerates my brother-in-law at best. No one is good enough and everyone is a liar according to my mother.

    Post # 59
    Member
    1848 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    I like my Future Mother-In-Law, I do. It’s just the little things that get to me:

    1. She is terribly overbearing. When she gets her claws into something, she doesn’t stop.

    2. She apparently doesn’t think I can know something better than her because I’m younger.

    3. She ALWAYS calls at the worst times.

    She’s a nice person and she tries, but I am so glad I don’t have to deal with her too too often. My family is pretty quiet and we don’t fight too often, so it’s definitely something to get used to.

    Post # 60
    Member
    1022 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @javamonkey:  mu Future Mother-In-Law and I get along great. adore each other, truely

    Post # 61
    Member
    288 posts
    Helper bee

    I voted for somewhere in between. She isn’t horrible and 80% of the time I really like her. However, I have my moments when I CAN’T STAND HER!!! I’m marrying her only son and yongest child and man does it show. Whenever we talk about moving out of state she freaks and talks to him when I’m not around about staying here because she couldn’t possibly lose her baby boy. The other thing that drives me crazy is that Future Sister-In-Law (who I adore) is by far the favorite. She has the perfect hubby, the perfect dog, the perfect home, the perfect work schedule, and has the one and only granddaughter. They adore her dog and are always babying it, asking for him to come stay with them and they won’t even let Fiance and my dog in their house! It drives me crazy and scares me for when Fiance and I TTC. We can never live up to her standards. So frustrating.

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