(Closed) Anyone else having a Self-Marriage?

posted 5 years ago in 30 Something
Post # 121
Member
864 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2006

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mojitomint44:  

I’m happy that you reconsidered this idea because you probably would have received some very negative attention from your guests which would make you feel worse. 

You may want to consider therapy for your self esteem and entitlement issues. I only mention difficulties with entitlement because you seem to think that others are obligated to give you items and attention. 

Post # 122
Member
13663 posts
Honey Beekeeper

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mojitomint44:  If you had to save for a year to do it, at the expense of your own potential future needs? I’d pretty much say the same thing. Not going into debt is a pretty low bar.

Post # 123
Member
864 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2006

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immoralbeloved:  

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ilovesophia was only speaking the truth about the discrimination against obese individuals in the dating world. How did you come to the conclusion that she meant overweight people cannot find love? I don’t understand….

Post # 124
Member
6217 posts
Bee Keeper

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weddingmaven:  She’s already updated a change in mind anyway… page 7 I believe.  So it’s probably not worth arguing over.

Post # 125
Member
278 posts
Helper bee

Can’t wait to hear details of the honeymoon!

Post # 126
Member
4393 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

This reminds me of when Dennis Rodman married himself.

very interesting…

Post # 127
Member
4066 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2009

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mrsbrizz2017:  omg, I want to wear a tutu and eat a cake, lol.

Post # 128
Member
677 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I’ll never for the life of me understand why people register when they have kids.  A wedding I get, you’re hosting a big party, but kids?   Nope. Why should I buy nappies for your baby?  (And I say this as a heavily pregnant mother).

So, I find it damned hypocritical that so many PPs have no problem forcing their acquaintances to buy bottle sterilizers but balk at this single woman for registering.

If anything, a single woman living on one in needs the community support more than anyone.

Post # 129
Member
814 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

This thread started as laughable, then turned really sad…

Post # 130
Member
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

I find the idea of a self marriage difficult to grasp. There are so any ways you could choose to show your commitment to self. However, even if I didn’t understand, and you were a good family or friend, I would support your decision. What you are doing in no way is harmful to anyone else and we all have the choice to participate or not. IMO, if I were you, I would use the money that you will be using for your wedding to enrich myself…. travel by myself, take some classes to learn something new, do new things to meet new people… once you are happy with who you are by yourself as a single women, then you would have truly made a commitment to self. 

Post # 131
Member
13663 posts
Honey Beekeeper

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skunktastic:  I know, but in case OP has second thoughts I wanted to add the financial consideration. It goes to my bias that 20k for a one day party is a questionable use of resources for the majority of people in their 20s or 30s. 

Post # 132
Member
568 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I’m still trying to understand self-marriage but I’m seeing more and more people doing this nowadays. You seem excited and happy for taking this step in your life and that’s all that matters. I think some posts were uncalled for and rude and I’m assuming that is due to the fact that many of us don’t understand or see the reasoning behind it. But if this what you want to do and you want to share your committment with family and friends…then go for it! But I do have to ask…if you found someone that you want to be with…will you be willing to give them a chance? But if you don’t want to be in a relationship and focus on yourself…there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that either.

Post # 134
Member
15 posts
Newbee

To be honest as another mid-thirties single who is not dating or entertaining anyone, the way you commit to loving yourself is to just do it.  You do the things that make you happy,  live your life the way you want, and pursue your goals.  Everything will fall into place, including meeting someone.  Don’t spend all that money on a “ceremony”, instead take yourself on a great vacation.  

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 5 months ago by AlitheBee.
Post # 135
Member
839 posts
Busy bee

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MarriedToMyWork:  If I was to put together all the homeware items I’ve received as gifts into a pile and then divide that into wedding gifts and non-relationship-status-related gifts, the latter pile would be much larger. I started receiving homeware items as gifts when I was a teenager for birthdays, Christmas and other life milestones (like my high school and uni graduations).

I’m all for celebrating the milestones in a person’s life, but I would definitely be pretty damn confused if I received an invition to an event celebrating a person’s commitment to themselves. I thought that that was pretty much the most profound commitment anyone could make, by default.

 

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